HumanBeingAwkward
@humanbeingawk
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american ⚘ autistic ⚘ artist ⚘ trekkie🖖🏽⚘ she/her ⚘ black ⚘ adhd ⚘ feminist ⚘ writer 🌸⚘ antiwar 🕊️⚘ 🇵🇸
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Joined May 2022
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KING KONG OUT NOW
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ENCOURAGE TO SAROCHA REBECCA
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“this is the most important election of our lifetime” every time
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If you're wondering why someone who seems very eligible and definitely would make a caring and loving partner is still single, consider the possibility that they may be neurodivergent.
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A solid description of why American mental health is suffering
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Millennials finding out a mortgage is less than we pay in rent, but we can’t get approved due to student loans.
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Manager and supervisors bullied me in a recorded meeting and I sent the recording straight to HR.
I literally told them the meetings were being recorded, -bc I couldn’t help myself, sorry I’m terrible at stealth-.
They’re gonna have a bad time in their next meeting with HR. 😎
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And you were literally everything that was wrong with the world if you didn't go to college.
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They may believe that their neurodivergence would be a burden on their partner. They may feel safer alone. Navigating a relationship and executive dysfunction can feel overwhelming. They may not feel like educating a new person about their particular flavor of neurodivergence etc
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A word of caution:
If you knew what psychology researchers are saying about us you'd be alot more hesitant about self identifying, let alone getting an official diagnosis. Almost all of the theories they're floating basically classify us as some kind of subhumans.
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They may anticipate or have a very real fear of abandonment once their partner realizes they're neurodivergent. They may even anticipate humiliation or abuse. They may be acutely aware of how vulnerable they are and have a hard time trusting etc
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The thing about Adhd people not missing people is a lie. When I remember people I miss them terribly.
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Is it true that people with Adhd dislike authority but do better in structured environments?
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One of the biggest neurodivergent ‘tells’ that I’ve noticed is being ‘too honest’
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I don’t think most ppl who aren’t ND realize how little you have to do for your behavior to be considered abnormal. This is what Autistic and Adhd and other ND folks are referring to when we say there are a lot of ‘rules’.
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My boss just introduced a new Ai that tracks our activity to the minute, and expects us to be actively working/ clicking 70% of the time. Morons.
The only metric they should care about is assignment completion. This will penalize ppl who finish work quickly. I hate this.
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How to communicate like Autistics: 🧵
1. Shift your attention from body language to what is being said
2. Cut small talk. No discussions of weather, children, partners or pets unless there’s something genuinely interesting about them
3. Questions are taken at face value
1/3
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Manager has started singling out the new guy who I think may be Autistic and/or Adhd. Like she’s misreading his body language and assuming that he’s not paying attention, and has started dismissing his questions. Workplaces really need training on Autistic and Adhd differences.
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I've often wondered if it's possible to get all of my nutrition in a single daily drink. I know I'd still need to remember to drink water throughout the day but is there a single drink that takes care of all nutritional needs? Is that a thing?
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Insults I received that were based on my Autistic traits:
So smart you’re dumb
Space cadet
Flighty
No common sense
Robotic
Arrogant
Know it all
Book smarts but no street smarts
Clueless
Airhead
Weird
Disrespectful
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About Autistics being easier to manipulate. It’s only bc we assume other people mean what they say, bc we do. Maybe it would good if we were taught from an early age that other ppl usually don’t.
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I'm not sure if this is an Autistic thing or an ADHD thing; but I find making friends easier when our connection revolves around a specific activity or hobby. I think the solution to making friends as an AuDHD is joining clubs and attending activities in my areas of interest.
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She’s a 10 but she’s autistic…so what I’m saying is she’s really an 11
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If Adderrall makes you ‘robotic’ or ‘calm and sleepy’ you may be Autistic.
Adderrall has treated your Adhd, revealing your Autism.
Allistics abuse Adderrall to party longer and work/study without sleeping. It energizes them. They don’t experience a ‘flat effect’ from it.
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I realize now when HR talks to you they’re basically looking to see how strong your evidence is against the company.
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I'm not sure what the fire part is about but the rest of this meme resonates with me. I'm a cycle breaker and I don't think I'll have children. I may also choose to be single forever. (I've been married 2xs already)
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My uncle who used to molest me is in a coma. I’m ashamed to admit that I want to visit him in the hospital just to watch him die.
#dontbeachildmolestor
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This is what an Autistic person looks like. Autism doesn’t have a look.
This is what an Autistic looks like. Just one of many. 😅 Not all Autistics look the same!
#ActuallyAutistic
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I keep hearing social anxiety described as part of Autism. I can only speak for myself, but I had - 0 - social anxiety before bullying finally convinced me of the necessity of masking.
#ActuallyAutistic
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I cancelled my date this weekend. We talked again and it became apparent to me that our age gap represented major generational differences along with there being other incompatibilities. Glad I insist on a pre-date talking period. Despite it annoying men I highly recommended it.
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Some therapists will take your money knowing they aren’t qualified to help you. I basically paid someone to take notes while wasting my time. She knew by the second session that she was out of her depth, but rather than ending the sessions with a referral, she watched the clock.
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One Autistic trait is described as ‘unusual passivity’. I see it as NTs basically admitting that conflict mongering is one of their traits.
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Autistics have been framed as sensitive, and autism as a ‘sensory disorder’.
The research however, shows that Autistic people have heightened sensory processing abilities.
You’d experience sensory overload too if you could detect as much as we do.
Research links coming
👇
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Does anybody else have an urge to immediately look up any word they don’t know? 🤔
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@SirBreygon
So many reasons depending on the type of neurodivergence, like executive dysfunction, bullying for being neurodivergent, a world that is built for NTs, dissociation, autistic thinking etc.
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One of the most misunderstood Autistic traits is our tendency to ignore rules that don’t make sense, or that nobody explains. But we literally don’t have a memory compartment for “bc I said so” and other made up bullshit. I hope this was clarifying. 🙂
#actuallyautistic
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I personally prefer people who are outside of 'the norm'(if there's any such thing). Despite the theories that say very hurtful things about us. As a person who has always loved psychology and science its just hard to reconcile and feels very unjust.
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One thing I wish I’d known sooner was that I need to figure out a way to build a career out of my special interests, because trying to force my AuDHD brain to build a career outside of them is futile. Save yourself the grief.
#actuallyautistic
#ADHD
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Claiming autism is a disability seems to accept the Allistic view that there is something wrong with us, but I believe something is wrong with society for being such a hostile place to be neurodivergent.
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What does confidently Autistic and/or Adhd look like?
I think it may include
1. sitting however you want and not explaining yourself
2. openly wearing earphones/headphones
3. not scripting, just saying what makes sense to you in whatever way is natural
4. asking questions
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4. Replace baseless hierarchies with rank based on skill level
5. Dispense with time wasting social rituals
6. Anyone can at any moment that they notice inefficiencies, simply state that, no one is allowed to take it personally
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For Autistics, explaining something in detail is a sign of caring. It can even be a love language.
I realized only this year that for NT it has a negative connotation. They see it as a sign of anger, 'telling someone off', deception, or calling them stupid.
#acutallyautistic
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The Autistic tendency to offer comfort by sharing your own similar experience to validate the other person's experience and let them know they're not alone.
The NT tendency to interpret that as the Autistic person trying to make it all about them.
#ActuallyAutistic
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7. Interrupting a dialogue is not automatically rude, depending on the value the information brings to the dialogue
8. Disagreements will be resolved by comparing research
9. Valuable info is preferred to charismatic delivery
10. Flat delivery is sometimes more efficient
3/3
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The 40 hour work week wasn’t actually designed with the assumption that someone else would take care of cooking/cleaning/childcare, it was designed on a foundation of how many hours of labor will workers quietly tolerate. Stop projecting empathy onto the 1%.
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The autistic experience of knowing something but not being able to explain how you know.
#actuallyautistic
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Has anyone figured out any tricks for getting around executive dysfunction?
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I need to be cuddled and loved platonically by a man without getting poked, or feeling any desire from him. I know that’s the definition of a dad, but why can’t more men be safe in that way?
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I’ve always loved parallel play. My friend in elementary school was also autistic and it was natural for us, but it’s hard to find anyone who isn’t autistic who gets it.
#ActuallyAutistic
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I can’t tell my boss that I would get more work done w.o interruptions. For an Allistic a chat might feel like a pleasant pause. For me it pulls me out of hyperfocus, and forces me to abruptly switch tasks (very stressful for many Autistics) and mask for a high stakes convo.
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Autistic tips for NT communication:
To make a stronger point use fewer words. It may feel like you’re not actually communicating but don’t worry, that’s not the goal. I don’t know what the goal is either, but I know NT like this very much.
#ActuallyAutistic
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I have hyperphantasia and I can visualize the apple in my hand, take a bite, throw it against the wall and know what sound it will make, smell it, see it in different colors, press the brown spots on it, dice it up, turn it over in front of a light source...etc, in my mind's eye.
The established self test for the spectrum of phantasia (ability to visualize with your "mind's eye") is to describe how well you can picture an apple.
- Hyperphantasia (1) is indistinguishable from reality.
- Aphantasia (5) is an inability to picture anything at all.
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Is there a such thing as not ready for therapy? The therapy office said that about me when I cancelled.
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My mom is not willing to condemn my uncle for molesting me but she talks about religion nonstop. Religious abuse and hypocrisy is soul crushing.
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Anybody else reflecting on their childhood and realizing they were a really weird kid?
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Inflation is somehow affecting everything but incomes 🤔
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Has learning that gullibility is an Autistic trait made you less gullible? Despite my efforts and hopes, awareness doesn’t seem to have made me much less gullible.
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Austistic just being honest, and Allistic just being honest are not the same. Allistics often say this when saying something cruel, with full knowledge of how it will be received, and being mean is the point.
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Audhd presents differently from either Autistic or Adhd by itself. That’s been my experience as an Audhd, and with others who are either or both, but what’s your experience?
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Why do you think some people are so determined to gaslight Autistic people about being Autistic?
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TW: Painful sincere question:
Shouldn’t more Autistic ppl be more successful than we are since Autism is positively correlated with high intelligence and many of us were ‘gifted’ kids?
What do you believe is/has held you back?
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I want to see a show in which Autistic traits aren't treated as oddities, but explained to create understanding of our neurotype. Like ask an Autistic person what's happening when they're gazing into the distance, or stimming, or changing the subject often or sitting 'oddly' etc.
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@TedHasADHD
You’re right and I’m hoping Hr will be intimidated into doing the right thing by my evidence and documentation.
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I read a theory that intelligent people are less social because they esssentially need to protect their generative mental space from people who might harm the process, and it kind of made sense.
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Literally when I stop masking ppl automatically assume I’m arrogant, too sure of myself, ‘thinks I’m better than everyone’, snobby, entitled etc …PROJECTION. Literally just my resting facial expression with absolutely no mood or intent added to it whatsoever.
#actuallyautistic
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It just occurred to me that this is kind of like regression to being bottle fed. Take me back 🤣
But I'm serious about my inquiry, is it a thing?
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It's hurtful to assume that people who have gone no contact with their family don't value family.
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My big deal of 2023:
I will no longer feel ashamed of or apologize for being different/weird/quirky/neurodivergent/myself.
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I really need to figure out my exit plan or my livelihood will always be at the mercy of these fucking morons. 😒
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The Autistic urge to either directly tell the person you have a crush on that you like them or not say anything at all ever, as opposed to flirting.
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