Derek Heckman
@herekdeckman
Followers
2K
Following
67K
Media
6K
Statuses
23K
Fiction writer/schoolmarm. Not coming back for thirty percent. (he/him)
Washington, DC
Joined March 2016
Thread of my stuff if anyone would like to read it. You don’t have to, but it would be cool if you did. Some of it is pretty good:.
1
2
13
Honestly don’t need this many trailers for Weapons. I am extremely going to see this movie. I don’t need to see scary Benedict Wong while I’m trying to watch And Just Like That.
0
0
0
*Carrie Bradshaw writing Mrs. Dalloway*. “The woman said she would by the flowers herself”.
0
0
2
Think I did most of these waiting in line to go in a grocery store during Covid.
0
0
0
Doing a light rewatch. Dug this back up.
1
0
0
“And what did you get? A Coldplay concert? Lots of people have had that”
0
0
2
Don Draper turning from the blackboard in his meeting with NJM Insurance: “No jingles or mascots”.
0
0
0
Advised to visualize my “inner critic” as a separate entity from myself, so I’m picturing it as Parker Posey in You’ve Got Mail
0
0
2
Riverdale is the best show to ever air on television. In this episode, a character is shuffling through Polaroids of different artifacts and with complete confidence stops on one picture and says “that’s the Holy Grail”.
0
1
4
You can take the boy out of the Richie Jerimovich.
crying that when asked about who their personal fantastic four are, both pedro pascal and vanessa kirby say each other, but add their own families too which is joseph quinn's answer, and then there's ebon moss bachrach 😭
1
0
1
Today’s great Raymond Chandler line is “you look like a guy who was almost a heel, but somebody stopped you, just at the last minute”.
0
0
0
A different branch of the Recently-Arrived Alien/Malfunctioning Android school of acting.
0
0
1
Whatever the hell Mary-Louise Parker is doing in The West Wing walked so whatever the hell Dakota Johnson is doing in her career could run.
1
0
1
Today I’ll go with the joke that Jack went to Princeton on an “Amory Blaine Handsomeness Scholarship”.
I love it when somebody tweets “what’s the best 30 rock joke” and everyone replies with their fave 30 rock joke. Can somebody pls do that? I would but I’ve done it too many times in the past and I should let somebody else have the engagement this time.
0
0
7
Last night the Cat in the Hat trailer played before my movie, and when they did the reveal of all the Things at the end, literally half of the audience gasped.
0
0
0
This is what happened in the civil war.
0
0
2