hayd
@haydroflask
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Following
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secrets from a girl (who’s seen it all)
New York City
Joined February 2017
Texted an old hookup while I’m visiting and he clocked me so fiercely with that last text… clearly not very well if I’m texting you !
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Stood next to him in line at an airport chick fil a a few months ago and could’ve sworn I knew him because he was a Twitter twink or something lmaooo
A major achievement to pull this off and not be remotely famous. The average person on the street might have seen all 3 of these and still not be able to pick him out of a police lineup
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Me asffff
“I hate gay halloween what do you mean you’re” but it’s a gay guy doing something that is in no way niche.
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Celebrity Halloween costume photoshoots are giving the same energy as the ones drag race queens do to show their outfits throughout the season
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Tech bro yelling on the phone in the locker room about something idiotic you will begin to cough in 3 days…
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I hate y’all fr. Why are we being so mean to strangers about this stupid fucking tweet… no more gay beauty standard discourse I’ve had ENOUGH
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New Florence is giving Ceremonials… we used to pray for times like this!!!!
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Britani Bateman should be the next Bachelorette and I’m 100% serious
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My Lily Allen tea…
You can’t hurt my feelings I once had a boyfriend who asked me for an open relationship over FaceTime while he was on vacation
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Doing push day to Lily Allen divorce album >>>>
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This being my biggest tweet (outside of deuxmoigate) is so stupid. Like it’s not even funny! AND it has a typo!!!
One thing nobody gives pigeons enough credit for is their ability to get out of the way in the sidewalk. A lot of you could learn a thing or two from them!!!
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Guy on the elevator told me it was going up when it stopped on my floor so I didn’t get in. Then I watched it go all the way down to the ground floor.
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The best service you can get in New York is on the L beneath the east river.. that shit’s got a direct connection to StarLink or something
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Anyway if you have any London or Barcelona recs lmk I’ll be there for two weeks
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Made the mistake of saying out loud how excited I was to stay home and not travel the whole month of November and the universe decided to punish me by giving me 3 week long work trips instead
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Just saw someone post their friendsgiving like babe Halloween hasn’t even actually happened yet we’ve lost the plot completely
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