gazillion bombs
@gazillionbombs
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Following
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she drugs me to keep me delectable! former baby genius
USA
Joined August 2016
theres a beaver who moved into my house and wont stop sitting at my desk, saying hes "logging in", and laughing till he pisses himself in my chair and i cant get rid of him.
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skinny people are lame asl because they can't shake it like those fellas
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i dont cut my toenails so i can always get that good "hand-free" ankle scratch in wheneva i want! #WEEKENDGAINS
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Sucking on 🅱️ig fat titties like the water thing in a hamster cage.
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freaky friday is a movie where people swap bodies. because that would be freaky
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yet another fool-hearted buffoon tried to question my scholarly acumen. bout as useful as a screen door on a submarine.
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always thought MDNI was shorthand for @ZohranKMamdani's last name...
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accidentally started reading a lovers to enemies fanfiction. #wackymixup
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a server will look me dead in the eyes and say "do you want everything that comes with that?" and then I say "yeah that sounds good thanks"
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and stoned off what never will be.
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i have to knock these free every time i do my monthly underpants change.
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stavros got snubbed in the "fat molestor" category at the oscars this year...
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exact context for this scene btw.
Netanyahu waking up in his Palantir drone body after being infused with Charlie Kirk's soul
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well normally i put it in my mouth and then open and close my mouth to make it easier to swallow.
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watching the #oscars and wondering when 67 gonna happen.
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