“Everybody loves us weird girls, right up until we start doing weird girl shit,” I say to my cat, as we watch a documentary about serial killers in our matching onesies.

taking my bullshit to bluesky, where I will also be annoying and/or mostly inactive

No more visible likes on the ego-boosting validation machine is a very smart and useful idea. I’m sure there’s absolutely no way it will backfire or reduce engagement.

Morning, fuckers. Proof of life or whatever

Talking to a guy I met and he sent me my own tweet as a meme he saved. So that’s something

Happy International Beaver Day

You know I keep that mf thang* on me *small container of googly eyes

Seems like a good day to wear the sun as a hat

Totally not a concerning shirt for your Health and Safety Specialist to wear.

Random app notifications about new features or reminding me that the app exists leads me to turn off notifications way more often than it makes me want to use that app.

https://t.co/iQJIwGeuPw

#NewProfilePic

Safety professionals appreciate a good railing

Everybody knows cattorneys study four years at a meowniversity and three in claw school

My car isn't dirty, it's spicy. Get it right.

I’m so excited for fall that I could blow a craft store scarecrow

Fuck me like I bullied you in high school

I got mine, and it’s fantastic 😎

On a dark desert highway Cool Whip in my hair

When I go shopping for new plants

Waiting for Ticketmaster (Taylor’s Version)