Thought I needed to see a psychic turns out I just needed to up my Zoloft

the potholes in LA are so bad right now i might stop taking my birth control

Whenever I go to the bathroom without my phone I feel like a pioneer woman

Making my boyfriend go to therapy

Having a sibling is great because it validates a lot of your experiences growing up. Like when a Frappuccino almost tore apart the family

No no I’m not sick my voice just sounds like that from screaming in my car

Driving in DTLA

I wouldn’t survive the apocalypse because I’m a slow runner and I haaaaate being dusty

I’m like an American Girl Doll in that when I’m horizontal my eyes close

I come from a long line of women who fear their hairstylist

Just got my period… wearing uggs and yoga pants… this is my divine femininity

Oh you’re not randomly crying on Christmas Eve?? Grow up.

one thing about me is that i tried to watch sopranos in march 2020 but they were hugging and kissing so much that i got jealous and had to turn it off.

In a way, no

Ok I would wanna don’t worry darling myself but I guess my alternate reality is I’m in my room and no one can text me and I have an entire new season of love island uk ahead of me

If you are married before 30 you’re a child bride and if you have a baby before 35 you’re a teen mom and that’s actually science

I don’t remember a lot from my childhood but I remember exactly what music videos were free downloads on iTunes

Ya per usual my Spotify wrapped is absolutely humiliating

Hey is anyone mad at me I promise I won’t be mad if you say yes

I’m a sports fan in the sense that I like events and hot dogs