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@eelwitch_

Followers
229
Following
123K
Media
628
Statuses
4K

☭ eelsage.bsky

いつも私が変なの? あっそ
Joined September 2011
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@eelwitch_
parody account
2 years
finally scanned a schizophrenic mech zine me & a dear friend made last year. read it for free: https://t.co/5oXCABcxQG
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@moayedHarazeen
Moayed harazen 🇵🇸
21 hours
Last night, this hungry cat visited me. Her meowing in the surroundings clearly showed how hungry she was — as if she was asking for help… I rushed to find anything I could offer her, but I only had a piece of bread. There is simply no meat available for me to give her!
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@eelwitch_
parody account
1 day
remember: when a man joins 2 separate military branches & a private military corporation to do war crimes, gets a Nazi tattoo & keeps it for 20 years, posts online about the colonial genocides he wishes he could've helped perform, and lies repeatedly, he ISN'T "proving" himself
@ZephyrTeachout
Zephyr Teachout
3 days
Look I think Pat Ryan is one of the best Congressmembers in America and he worked as a subcontractor for Palantir. Don’t let anyone off the hook it’s totally fair to ask about it but Plattners answers seem totally normal and credible. Let people prove themselves.
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@eelwitch_
parody account
2 days
remember, when a corporate landlord evicts a harm reduction organization, a tool library, or a community print studio, that doesn't count as violence. any of the very reasonable responses you might have to it *are* violence though, all of them, and you should turn yourself in now
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@eelwitch_
parody account
7 days
congratulations to fakecob miseryowski and the milfraudkee spewers on getting swept
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@eelwitch_
parody account
7 days
a lot of ostensibly "woke" still-living artists are being outflanked from beyond the grave
@ryuichisakamoto
ryuichi sakamoto
8 days
The Estate of Ryuichi Sakamoto supports the 'No Music For Genocide' initiative. Ryuichi Sakamoto's music is owned and distributed by various parties. To the extent possible, the Estate has removed or issued formal requests to labels to remove his music from all DSP (streaming and
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@eelwitch_
parody account
8 days
they obviously all deserve worse, so much worse i can't even describe it to you in words, but at least some of these ghouls are forced to sundown in public, making increasingly pathetic appearances until their miserable spirits finally shamble off this mortal coil
@kenklippenstein
Ken Klippenstein (NSPM-7 Compliant)
8 days
83 year old Senator Mitch McConnell just tripped and fell while being asked about ICE
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@eelwitch_
parody account
10 days
really funny to think cherelle parker is avoiding conflict with trump as part of a cunning & calculated uberwoke chess match balancing act when the entire first 2 years of her mayorship have proven her to be a feckless moron with no spine, principles, or brain
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@eelwitch_
parody account
13 days
saturday night commuting from downtown to an extremely accessible place i can reach via all 3 modes of public transportation and even still this is how bad the coverage is lol
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@eelwitch_
parody account
14 days
in 2064 i'm going to be dug into a foxhole defending the swampish wastes of the Winnipeg Free Zone, telling my younger comrades about The Bunt and The Walk and how Rob Thomson's brain could be seen leaking out of his ears if you looked closely enough into the dugout
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@eelwitch_
parody account
15 days
before betts even came to the plate i said in a chat "i hate this decision" and that's how i know i've been completely senile for 42 minutes & counting
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@eelwitch_
parody account
18 days
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@eelwitch_
parody account
16 days
in the final analysis the greatest crime of this Phillies team will be letting clayton KKKershaw off the hook
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@eyuplovely
Eyup Lovely
1 year
Oh no my gorgeous 39 year old baby son got kidnapped just for attending Coachella outside Auschwitz
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@eelwitch_
parody account
18 days
nothing encapsulates the Rob Thomson era better than a miserably stupid & swaggerless tactical decision that represents the hollowing death knell to an entire season of baseball. it was always going to end like this
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@eelwitch_
parody account
18 days
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@norabf
Nora Barrows-Friedman
20 days
“Misunderstood”? Babies aren’t passively dying. They’re being genocided by Israel, by your blood-soaked benefactors. Your pathetic life has mutated into a freak show. Your careerism has led you to this rank hell: making rich liberals feel better about mass murder. Eat shit
@VanJones68
Van Jones
20 days
Yeah, I messed up on this one. And I’m sorry. I was trying to raise awareness about foreign adversaries creating chaos online - which is undermining democracy everywhere. But what I said was easily misunderstood, and the way I said it was flat-out insensitive. Babies are dying
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@eelwitch_
parody account
23 days
the gluttonous imperial luxury isn't even worth the psychotic blood-cost enacted on the rest of the world. hurtling towards extinction so we can have doordash and uber. misery
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@eelwitch_
parody account
23 days
last night on my way to a show i saw 3 septa pigs arresting a guy in the subway because he was selling lighters. then on my way home i had to wait 25 minutes for the trolley to show up. lmao
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@eelwitch_
parody account
24 days
in my decades of life i've learned that the government does 3 things and they are 1. send weapons to isntreal 2. kidnap people and 3. execute people. so not really sure why i should be worried about a shutdown
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@eelwitch_
parody account
26 days
i'm on the highway in a 1963 Dodge Dart listening to "Highway Star" i cannot be killed by anything (except this Dodge Dart)
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