i think i need to admit that being active online has made me afraid to write and just put pressure on me. it was easier for me to write pre-socmed activation bc the only opinions i read are my bf's and the ones commenting on my fics.

i will also come back to do a giveaway. i'll be giving a bookbound copy of a series of mine to give back to my ao3 readers only. i already know how im going to choose. still pending tho cuz my bf is still making the cover, so we'll see if it pushes through. 🙏

see anything. truly, i'll miss u guys. it was a wild ride. i know most of you by your ao3 (and now twt) usernames. know i will always be thankful to you for always giving me your time of day and the love and words. 💛 see you on ao3 fellow pervs! 🫂 dioscums logging out.

i could stay in bsky, but even when i only had a few followers there, i already wanted to leave but couldnt bc there are 2 users there and i happen to be a fan of their work the follow me back and they dont have twt... :( but anyway im quitting all socmed anyway so i aint gonna

follow me back too!! i can die now) and some of them like my works too?! im actually so hyped beyond words like...!! hello??? im a huge fan, i goon to ur works...?! im already content, and what youve all given me was more than what i deserve. it just sucks that twt & bsky suck.

environment, but i always have the option to choose what to do about it. im letting go and leaving so i can contribute to jayvik nation and not letting all the negative discourse get to me. im happy i was able to get to know more of my fav artists and writers here (and they

was hard and i cried writing this bc i really did enjoy my time here on the occasions that i did. im doing this bc i love my readers and i do enjoy writing jayvik nasty sex. i want my whimsy and cracky self back. i cant do that when im constantly depressed. i cant change my

they like it enough, theyll check my account out and hopefully feel excited to see theres many fics to go through and binge. i know that feeling very well. writing this feels like such a heavy weight off my chest. i feel so fucking free being honest about this decision. it

they dont see it, my works will always be there. i'll never orphan or delete them bc i know years from now, there will be a new citizen to the jayvik nation who will look for fics. maybe they'll stumble upon mine by accident through bookmarks, a recc, or a collection. and if

the only things i'll be active for on socmed so i can spread the word and stuff. as for my other fics? i might not promo them here anymore. i dont see the point anyway bc the people who i actually want to read the fics i write will get a notif on their email anyway. and even if

that i dont find by my sorting through ao3. i joined RBB jayvik, a first for me to join any bb event. i have the opening date for contributors marked for this one zine im planning to apply for. i will be contributing to sbvw, dtjw, and 7 deadly sins weeks. these will probably be

only ever held love for bc of socmed. before im a writer, ive mostly always been a lurker consumer of creatives' outputs. that part of me will never leave, even if the writer in me feels like it just got hit by a truck. i joined 1 jayvik discord ytday to get my fix of fics

about my fav character. and as someone who always writes every character with genuine love for each of them? i hated myself for it. so much that i cried in the bathroom when the epiphany that i was beginning to resent my own hyperfixation and fav ship and this certain chara i

bf to post my stories on ao3 in the first place. social media killed my whimsy and took away my ability to write bc every single week all i see is new hate discourse. it got so bad that in my head i began resenting that character bc of the shit their own fans have been saying

i didnt want to explain to everyone that its easier for me to lurk and react with emojis bc im not good with speaking for myself bc even if i pretend to be nonchalant, i do care very fucking much what my readers think about what i write. its why it took so much convincing from my

i started resenting my inability to write. i began hating my own works seriously and nitpicking them when ive never done so that seriously. i hated that i couldnt reply fast enough or interact enough with my mutuals or other users on here bc my social anxiety always kicks in and

unfortunately, im just a pervert with an active imagination who wants to contribute to the jayvik fandom. i was the most content knowing that i even have readers in the first place who enjoyed my fics. the truth is being active here has started making me hate my own OTP.

write viktor getting his pussy plowed. at the end of the day, i know that i have at least 1 reader out there who looks forward to my works bc i always see the same usernames pop up in my kudos and comments. i didnt work so hard to write out all my jayvik fics to clout chase.

fame those other big writers/jvk household names have. i dont have to think that that kind of traction is a reflection of my ability to write. i dont have to worry the next fic i want to post will get me cancelled for ridiculous reasons like me giving jayce a 13 inch dick or if i

socmed. which actually happened so i had no choice but to stop reading that person's work since i assume im part of the demographic that shouldn't interact with them, and i respect that. i dont have to worry or beat myself up that my works or name will never reach the kind of

but i know the world always finds a way bc im in an arcane fb group where they repost a lot of art from here. im on ig liking some of my fav artists' works who are active there. i have ao3 where i can actually enjoy the fics without worrying whether the writer has me blocked on