worms cited
@christapeterso
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Philosophy PhD student. very powerful. love birds (she/her) đ
Joined May 2011
I know this is a minority position but I love the goofy intro sentences students write. Since the dawn of time, humans have wondered about the mind. fuckin tell me about it man.
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Did anyone ever say gustav thatâs enough leafs.
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TSA just unpacked a manâs bag and revealed it was 50% potatoes, is there no privacy in this world.
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my friend told me halfway through giving birth she was like âI canât do this, I simply cannot do this?â and they were like âoh you have toâ and life is just like that all the time.
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I love pigeons because when itâs time to make a nest theyâre like âfuckin whateverâ
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when I was a kid I took a mouse with a broken leg to the vet to have it amputated and afterwards the vet asked me what I thought was a good price and I was like â⌠$50?â and he asked me if I had $50 and I said no I do not and he charged me 5.
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Andrew Tateâs website was straight up just like âWhy am I an expert in this? Because I am a successful sex traffickerâ
Pick up artists are like âwe have invented a method of making her NEED youâ and the method is âpsychological abuseâ.
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do the flat earth people think the moon is also flat.
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i spent 2 hours curating a twitter blue screenshot storyline for my parents so here u go, for your own offline friends that want to have fun:. DAY 1 â ARRIVAL
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children donât like remote learning. thatâs why we have to give every one of them the coronavirus, which they will love.
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this is what the most powerful undiluted masculinity looks like
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Kamala sucks donât get me wrong. but I do think it would be good for the first female president to be a wacky bitch.
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Underneath my ex boyfriendâs car there was a tiny BABY
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elon musk fans are like âwe have created some problems on earth and so our only hope is moving to mars where there are literally none of the things we need to survive for 1 secondâ.
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Very good how a 83 year old with near universally terminal cancer didnât feel like retiring so now we donât get rights.
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Remember when almost 3,000 American civilians were killed. 750 Israeli civilians being killed is equivalent to that happening 29 times.
Netanyahu says October 7th was like âTwenty-Nine 9/11s in one dayâ
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Hotels used to have slots in the wall for disposing of razor blades and people were like âwhere do they go??â and the answer was âin the wallâ
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Itâs so wacky when Israel apologists are like âso everyone gets an ethnostate except Jews?â noâŚ. no ethnostatesâŚâŚ buddy where have you been???????.
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once a year a trans girl wins something and people are like âother girls tried so hard. and she won just because her BODY worked betterâ and yea man sports are like 95% that.
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people are like âZionists did NOT colonize Palestine. it was a Jewish kingdom in 500 BCâ as though Europeans showing up somewhere brown people live like âthis all belongs to usâŚ. We have a connection from two thousand years agoâŚ. â isnât the most colonial shit youâve ever heard.
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ok do we just not know what colonialism is.
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Elon is just demanding random people on his website tell him how it works now
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the Humpty Dumpty rhyme is like âa man fell off a wall and was irreparably harmedâ and everyone was like âhe was, I assume, an enormous eggâ.
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Israelis are like âthis isnât genocide because these arenât people, theyâre human monstersâ and yeah thatâs the genocide thing. That is how people think while committing genocide.
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but how was I as a child supposed to identify a price for general anesthesia mouse surgery.
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âSincerely,â is such a funny way to close a letter now that Iâm an adult and know what âsincerelyâ means.
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the zoomers are trying to input cheat codes into reality
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pharmacists are like âIf u legitimately needed this medicine you would be chill about not getting itâ would i.
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I used to think furry porn on the TL was just part of twitter but it turned out I just followed 1 guy that retweeted furry porn a lot.
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Macaulay Culkin going to a cafe in Paris where the wifi password was âMacaulay Culkinâ and a frenchman came out to say âI knew you would be here somedayâ
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It is impossible to get people to take this seriously but Israel is very literally an ISIS level destroyer of world heritage. Gaza City was one of the oldest cities on earth. It is gone.
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Imagine Irish people started bombing the British and demanding they withdraw from Ireland. Can anyone imagine that.
Imagine that the Republic of Ireland started bombing the UK with rockets, demanding that the UK withdrew from Northern Ireland and all the Protestants left the island. How do you think the UK would have responded?.
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My parents are in Costa Rica and I wasnât invited but they brought a picture of me on a stick where I look insane
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Iâm not a physicist but isnât the exterior of cars crumpling on impact good for like. safety.
To prove that the #Cybertruck's doors were strong, Elon Musk had someone take a sledgehammer to the new Tesla pickup.
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my cousin was telling me they couldnât go hiking because they didnât have a hiking backpack for their almost 2 year old and I 100% thought the issue was that they wanted her to carry her own gear.
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I do not think they should have taken a 19 year old kid 2 miles under the sea in their unregulated unclassed âexperimentalâ carbon fiber tube.
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I gave Eddy the last little bit of the deli turkey I was eating and he is purring like a freight train and patently about to beat the shit out of me if I do not give him more. but there is not more
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if I was JK Rowlingâs editor and she said âin my wizarding world thereâs slavery. And abolitionism is embarrassing â I would have said fucking what.
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American politics were pretty fundamentally broken by no one understanding that 1950s manufacturing prosperity was âthe only industrial power that wasnât just bombed to oblivionâ prosperity, which cannot return.
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I did not really expect there could be a more humiliating loss than Clinton in 2016 but Kamala isnât losing to Trump the wild new phenomenon, she is losing to Trump the listless and washed.
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inappropriately upset by this horrible chart with 2 axes for the same variable.
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itâs so funny how in the pandemic adults try to bully u for not wanting to get sick. U got me buddy i am a big fuckin pussy when it comes to whether i want to risk half my lung capacity to eat a hamburger indoors. im not even ashamed my crimes.
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she made people read this as an incredibly short dress instead of a shirt with no pants on through force of charisma alone. it was spice power
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people stopped saying âjust fucking google itâ because that does not really work anymore.
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every website now is like âoh were you looking for Answers? well here are Sentencesâ.
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She did not âturn out to be a terfâ she made herself the singular figurehead of a hate movement. They literally wear her face
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Iâm gonna be real I always thought it was Die Workwear in a pseudo German way.
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pete buttigieg grew his whole self in a lab to be a perfect candidate and by the time he fully congealed we were like âwe donât really like this kind of thing anymoreâ.
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Remember when Sinema blocked a minimum wage increase in a weird schoolgirl outfit.
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voting in California is like "how should kidney dialysis work. you decide!" every fuckin year.
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This is a joke but what actually happened is that after the mid 60s if you gave your students low grades theyâd get sent to die in Vietnam.
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Israel is like âwe are a enclave of western values, in the Middle Eastâ yea buddy I am familiar with colonialism.
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âI didnât spend 5 years busting my ass to be called by my first nameâ is such a wild take, do they think other people are just chilling.
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I feel this doesnât adequately emphasize that what she poisoned was *her rivalâs side of the chessboard.* She put mercury on her chess pieces.
chess consistently has the best scandals
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Israel is like âhelp! help! a refugee camp is oppressing us!â.
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âethical non-monogamyâ is imo kind of saying too much. if you just say âwe arenât monogamousâ people arenât going to be like âUNETHICALLY????â.
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I passed this in the hospital hallway going home one night after one of my sisterâs surgeries and I think about it all the time
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Remember when Shaun King was like âI am going to climb the seven summits,â and then after people donated thousands of dollars he was like âI have realized I cannot climb a mountainâ.
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Did he think it was fucking chromosomes.
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Once my beloved ex bf saw me feed wet food to Jenâs cats and he was just aghast I served it to them in can shape. He was like âyou donât fluff it up for them???????â.
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It is not getting enough attention that Israel keeps killing journalists IN THEIR HOMES. They are not dying in the field as war correspondents, they are dying because Israel bombed their house
#Palestine #Israel: 41 journalists killed in 1 month, including 36 in #Gaza by Israeli strikes. The situation is urgent. RSF calls for the protection of all journalists in Gaza & for foreign reporters to be able to enter & work there freely.đ.
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The MAGA kidsâ school seems extremely and consistently horrible
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Israel is like âto be clear, Yahya Sinwar died in a keffiyeh, calm and fighting to the lastâ
×××ר ׌××´× ××¤×¨×Ą× ×ת ×ת×ע×× ×××ר×× ×Š× ×××× ×Ą×× ×××ר
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Can journalists please stop calling this website âX.â Itâs like how we call Germany âGermanyâ even though they call themselves âDeutschland.â in our language it is called âTwitterâ.
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Itâs kind of striking that within a century or so Germans invented communism, nazism, zionism, reform judaism, fregeanism⌠like what was going on.
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the zoomies r the most enviable feature of the dog mind. If u have extra energy at the end of the day your brain enters party mode, you have the most fun ever running around, and then fall right to sleep.
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Can someone give me a word thatâs like âscabâ except for women who break solidarity with sexual abuse victims.
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Imagine you got a job working for Ivanka Trumpâs handbag company and then 2 years later you were one of the closest confidantes of the president of the united states and 4 years later u killed him with the coronavirus.
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thinking about how when people criticized this outfit the metal gear guy was like âonce you realize the secret reason for her exposure, you will be ashamed for your words and deedsâ and the secret reason was âshe breathes through her skinâ
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Hobie has OPPOSABLE THUMBS and a passion for CRIMES so Iâm gonna compile them here for ur isolation viewing
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This IDF roof knocking script has been circulating in my head for 2 weeks
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once I posted âitâs funny how âthe Hagueâ is like the only city that randomly decided to give itself a definite articleâ and everyone was like âdonât you live in Los Angelesâ.
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ok psa for undergrads or early grad students discouraged by struggling to read academic work: you literally have to develop new literacy skills to comfortably read significantly different kinds of writing!! It is really effortful at first bc you are learning to read in a new way.
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If you are a professor, âIâm a professor!â is 1) exactly the right thing to say to explain your presence on campus, and 2) exactly the right thing to get on film as a cop roughs you up. useless nerds please shut the fuck up.
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One of the cis women featured in the BBCâs âare some trans women sexually predatory?â piece is a serial rapist.
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Pick up artists are like âwe have invented a method of making her NEED youâ and the method is âpsychological abuseâ.
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it is unreal how the israeli polity has widely convinced themselves and their western allies that the regular practice of calling people and saying âin five minutes I will bomb your houseâ is a humanitarian gesture and not a deranged regime of terror.
Sky full of Israeli drones .A Quadcopter above the square I live in.And NO CALLER ID keeps calling.
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âThey are mutilating children and have captured every institution that could stop themâ is a path with exactly 1 destination.
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a problem I am having with trying to do anything is that fundamentally in my heart I think the fucking world is ending.
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