Capitol Hill Books
@chbooksdc
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“They’re woke as heck but they do have good books.” — some guy on the internet.
657 C Street SE Washington DC
Joined June 2013
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
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Pinned Tweet
Our staff will hand-pick books for you based on your tastes. Just tell us your budget, what you’re into, and where to ship the books.
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Can someone start a rumor on Reddit that used paperbacks are about to skyrocket in value?
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If I didn’t know better, I’d say books about racism and the lgbt folks are not the biggest threat to school kids.
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Reminder: the best way to avoid MAGA tourists in DC this holiday weekend is to enter a bookstore.
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“Just vote,” they say to 700k DC residents without voting representation in Congress.
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No, we don’t have any of the recalled Dr. Seuss books and why are you suddenly trying to buy them now that you found out they have racist imagery, you weirdos.
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Just finished 62% of this novel and we’re so excited for Gatsby and Daisy.
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*Phone rings*
Me: Capitol Hill Books
Angry guy: Yeah, I don’t like what you’re doing w this stimulus bill.
Me: Sir, you’ve called a bookstore.
AG: This is Capitol Hill, isn’t it!!!
Me: Capitol Hill is a neighborhood.
AG: Well put me through to AOC!
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Favorite email of the day so far: “If I give you guys $100 can you send me a mystery bag of books?”
Yes. Yes we can.
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Running a little behind because of the attempted coup in our neighborhood by a deranged fascist mob, but rest assured that we will get to your orders soon.
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There’s some prose in this house.
There’s some prose in this house.
There’s some prose in this house.
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Shout out to whoever left this outside the store this morning.
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Good morning to all the DC bookstores except the Amazon store in Georgetown.
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Good morning to all the D.C. bookstores except the Amazon store in Georgetown.
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We are open but our main goal today is to read quietly and provide only minimal customer service. Thank you for your consideration.
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There’s some prose in this house.
There’s some prose in this house.
There’s some prose in this house.
There’s some prose in this house.
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Come buy our books before 4pm and we will give you...
Zero percent off because there’s a pandemic and times are hard.
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We are offering no refunds if you find shrimp tails in your used paperbacks. That’s all part of the experience.
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Luckily, local school boards have no authority over what we carry in our shop. Happy pub day to
@nhannahjones
!
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We are sad to share that Jim Toole, owner of Capitol Hill Books from 1995 - 2018, has passed away.
Jim, AKA The Admiral, was still an active employee of Capitol Hill Books & will be dearly missed. He was one of a kind.
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Number one reason ppl in DC seek serious relationships is because we know that at some point we’ll need a ride to/from Dulles.
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Shout out to good books for helping us all make it through the pandemic.
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The thing about women’s gymnastics at the elite level is: oh wait why don’t I shut up because I have no idea what I’m taking about.
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Announcement: After 14 months of appointment only browsing, we will re-open to the general public on June 1st.
Thanks to everyone who helped us survive the past 14 months.
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Ever dream of having Capitol Hill Books all to yourself? Now you can. Email us to reserve a one hour time slot. info
@capitolhillbooks
-dc.com
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Reminder: your local bookseller may be hungover today. Use your inside voices, please.
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Yes. We’re open. Don’t call us on the phone like some psychopath.
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Tell me you’re an indie bookstore without telling me you’re an indie bookstore.
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“It’s called shorting a stock and what these guys did is they...”
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AOC living in Navy Yard and being like “why is DC soulless?” is weak.
@AOC
we will pay for your cab ride to Florida Ave Grill.
i like AOC quite a bit but new yorkers are absolutely insufferable about food. corner store breakfast sandwiches are fine! and you can find them everywhere!
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Totally trust that no customer would lie about being vaccinated because we have learned no lessons from our years of experience dealing with the public.
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Attention D.C.! Fake an illness. Leave work. Go read in the park.
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Aw man, Facebook is down and I really need to know how my high school classmates are coming with their vaccine research. ☹️
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How can DC even be a state when we don’t have a Dairy Queen?
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Can’t wait for that 6-3 Supreme Court ruling that says we’re only allowed to sell the Bible.
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Just heard someone say “I’ll just order it later on Amazon.”
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No, it wasn’t just your imagination. The new
@cnn
commercial w
@jaketapper
you saw last night during the Final Four did feature a cameo of your local indie bookstore.
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Us in 2016: Man, it’s so busy on weekends! Should we hire more ppl?
Us in 2021: Should we even try to sell books this weekend or will there be too many armed, virus-spreading fascists roaming the neighborhood?
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For a basement apartment with no windows???
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This past weekend a guy in a gingham shirt said “Well, according to Malcolm Gladwell…” as his gf turned her back & rolled her eyes.
DC is back, baby!
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We will re-open to the general public TODAY at 10am! This is not a drill!
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@chayab77
True story: Limbaugh’s home town was the town next to mine and there was a small mural of him on the Mississippi River flood wall downtown. When I was a teenager we used to pee on it.
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Don’t worry, still planning on wearing our masks during sidewalk sales to hide our judgment of your book purchases.
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One bright spot about 2020: haven’t had to go to Georgetown all year.
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It’s fascinating that random ppl on twitter think we owe them a detailed explanation of how we arrived at our mask policy and think a small bookstore trying to protect staff is a “power grab.”
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Really sinister vibes in DC today as we sat outside sipping tea, waving to kids in strollers, and selling Elena Ferrante paperbacks.
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Oh snap! We just sold a book to an actual person in the store!
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Let me just move this shelf a bit and see what happens…
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Is anything as impressive as a Hill staffer name-dropping the representative they work for? Man, we’ve got goosebumps all over.
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Every once in a while an excited Japanese tourist wanders in saying they learned about our store on Japanese TV. We are huge in Japan, somehow.
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We’re still masking for now. If you’ve been to our store it should be clear why—pretty tight quarters and social distancing is sometimes impossible. Also, I’m immunocompromised, so try not to kill me, thanks.
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Welcome, new followers. I would say prepare to be disappointed, but you’ve just gone through 2020 so you’re probably familiar w the concept.
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In roughly 24hrs, we will re-open to the general public. We are both excited to sell you books and totally unprepared for the awkward social interactions that will inevitably ensue.
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Customer: I’m looking for a book.
Us: Dope, we’ve got 50,000 of them.
Customer: Do you have Your Best Life Now by Joel Osteen?
Us: No. I don’t think we carry that.
Customer: Why not?
Us: It didn’t make our top 50,000.
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Reminder: if you don’t have a one month supply of books, you are not fully prepared.
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As a poet once said: Brrr. It’s cold in here. There must be some Toros in the atmosphere.
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This ain’t Barnes $ Noble, baby.
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Ppl running right now when it’s 34 degrees and raining what are you trying to prove?
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Warning: if you’re gonna be the dude who asks our booksellers w brown skin where they’re from and then act unsatisfied & keep pressing when they say Michigan, we cannot be responsible for what happens to you so my strong advice is to not be that dude.
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How about we ban anyone who hasn’t read any critical race theory from talking about critical race theory.
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Do you realize how many books these nerds in DC are gonna buy once that student loan cancellation hits?
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If
#Nats
win the
#WorldSeries
tonight, will take 20% off all purchases tomorrow.
If they lose, we’ll only take 20% off copies of Bleak House by Dickens.
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Some news!
Henceforth, these 4 full-time employees will no longer suffer under the yoke of management oppression (Aaron! and, ok, to a lesser extent me). We decided to make them co-owners of the bookstore. Capitol Hill Books now has 8 co-owners.
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Some days we get depressed at the thought that we’ll never have time to read all the books in our store. Other days we’re just happy to have the extra insulation from the cold.
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Keep in mind that your local bookseller might be hungover this morning so maybe talk softly around him.
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Just checked into Facebook and we had no idea we’d gone to high school with so many Iran experts. It’s really quite impressive.
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When the amount of darkness outside begins to match the amount darkness inside you, it means Russian novel season is approaching.
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Limited time offer: If this gets 100k retweets by Friday, we’ll give everyone a 20% off their in-store purchase next weekend.
A cynical ploy? Perhaps. But frankly I don’t think you can do it anyway.
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“Have you read Atlas Shrugged? It’s one of my faves.” 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩
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An employee just asked if Tribe Called Quest was a one-hit wonder. Started to answer but was simpler just to fire them.
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So much easier to read books quickly when you don’t have to stop to check Twitter every 15 minutes to make sure white supremacists aren’t invading the neighborhood.
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I really cannot overstate how much easier it is to sell books when the store is open to the public. This is so easy compared to prior 14 months. We just unlock the door. That’s it. Almost feels like cheating.
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Stay safe out there today, readers. The vibes are wild.
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Ppl think owning a used bookstore is all sex, drugs & rock n roll, but it’s mainly about telling customers the prices are all listed on the inside cover of the books over & over & over until you forget your own name.
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Kinda miss the old days when we had like 2k followers and could say whatever without a bunch of ppl taking us too seriously so if you’re on the fence about unfollowing go ahead and pull the trigger.
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The lamestream media won’t do the tough stories anymore, so I guess we have to.
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Friday reminder: If you go home with somebody this weekend and they don’t have any books at their place do not sleep with them…🚩🚩🚩…unless they are really, really hot.
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Sometimes I’m like “aw man, this shirt is too rumpled. I can’t wear this to work.” But then I remember I work at a used bookstore and this is what I’m supposed to look like.
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We’re gonna find so many good books this year and you’re going to buy them and it’s gonna be great.
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