Bryan Tan
@bxtsubsea
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Co-Founder @ Thalassa. Doing it live @fdotinc. Currently hiring founding engineers!
San Francisco, CA
Joined October 2025
If a pre-seed investor asks you for financials, block them immediately.
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No LLM could ever be as spiritually dedicated to Shareholder Value Maximization as I am.
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Never wash your chicken before cooking. This removes all of the nutrient.
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Feeling good. Locked in. Funding secured. Technical development on schedule. Just read The Last Samurai. Ghosted after 1st date. Extra large Bulleit Bourbon.
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If this post does not get 500 likes, there will be swift and dire consequences.
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Should broke founders invest in other broke founders’ startups?
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VC: We’ll get back to you with next steps within a week Me: Oh perfect, looking forward to never hearing from you again
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Just pretend you understand things, nod along, and interject with occasional subject relevant “insights.” Will take you far in life.
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Yeah I actually do think Zohran’s wife is hotter than Sydney Sweeney. Does that make me a lib?
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I would do the follower bodycount thing but CIA says I’m not allowed to discuss my work abroad
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I didn’t know Bryan Johnson was the CEO of Telegram.
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