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damn i wish i was your lawyer

@bermanmatt

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Holding on to the Oxford comma. #BLM | bokononist

Washington, DC
Joined September 2011
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
11 months
Just watched this guy run 4 red lights in my neighborhood. If you see him, please blow his car up.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
1 year
I hope Dave, Eric, and Stephen just audioslave this. Find some awesome vocalist without an ego/alcohol problem and a less cult-y vibe, write some cool new music, and have a happy 2nd, 3rd, 4th, or whatever the hell act they're on. Call it, like, Jane's Rehabilition or something.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
1 year
Watching Perry Farrell meltdown and Jane's Addiction collapse under the weight of anger, alcohol, and acrimony, and it's almost like they never left.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
1 year
Coming out of Xitter retirement to say that I just read @EricIdle’s “Always Look on the Bright Side of Life,” and in addition to being very funny and very star-studded, the chapter on George Harrison’s death legit made me cry. Beautiful book, Eric, and a hell of a life and story.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
is that why they’re called the drifters?.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
“When this old world starts getting me down.And people are just too much for me to face.I climb way up to the top of the stairs.And all my cares just drift right into space…”. ah no dude’s gonna jump ain’t he.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
The rock band Tik-Toks where band members tell you about their upcoming show in your city all have a real “come see my improv team” vibe to them.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Who would have thought this Carlito's Way cosplay dude could have engaged in a criminal endeavor.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
I find the trend of artists advertising their current concert tour as having a career-spanning setlist kind of amusing as I believe that’s what most concerts already were.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Walking into a Whole Foods from a lower level parking garage and I’m happy to report that the tradition of smoking pot in poorly ventilated stairwells is alive and well.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Another great day of DC sports! #DistrictofChampions
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Love that U2/B.B. King version of When Love Comes Town where B.B. King proves he is always blues-y in any setting and U2 proves they have not a single blues-y bone in their collective bodies.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Could listen to Dolores O'Riordan yodel all damn day.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Hells yeah, Dogfish Head.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Excited to buy all the coolest stuff from the malls and airplanes of the ‘90s.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Remember when Clint Eastwood "debated" an empty chair? That's literally every Republican primary debate in this election cycle.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
National Zoo to honor local tradition by turning newly empty panda enclosure into a CVS/TD Bank/Dispensary.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Big congrats to the Hollywood trainers and crash nutritionists who are about to have a bang up couple months.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Yo, Disney, when we gettin’ The Big Mermaid, eh?.
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@bermanmatt
damn i wish i was your lawyer
2 years
Yay! We can all stop not watching old stuff and get ready to start not watching new stuff!.
hollywoodreporter.com
The work stoppage will end 12:01 a.m. on Thursday.
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