dni if you have a walking pad (I’m jealous).

walked 8k steps so far but it’s hot outside for that rn does walking in one place is actually the same lol ?.

I gained but I look better than yesterday so ??.

good morning!! i actually feel pretty normal today, coffee for breakfast

I’m tired of going through some shit I want a life that I can actually enjoy not this constant anxiety and pain from cptsd.

how do I stop crying fr.

ripped my journal for venting I just get so mad sometimes when I write.

whst else do I have to do?? why no one giving me clear instructions? “it’ll get better” when? I keep waiting and waiting and nothing so far.

I just want to be safe and feel safe and for this fucking healing to start working because I do so much but don’t see any progress I’m so sick of it !!.

it’s just started today with being slightly agoraphobic I crashed out in the store because I hated the background music and I went home abd just started spiraling and every shitty scenario appeared in my head.

I did hit myself in the head with a pen for a minute one day I’ll just kms on accident and won’t realize it.

why do I feel like this. this was supposed to be getting better not worsen.

I’m shaking I almost stabbed myself in the eye.

same…

drinking hot coffee in this weather was a mistake.

breakfast !!

this shit always takes so much energy I get hungry afterwards.

I want coffee and something sweet.

cried and hit myself again … went absolutely insane during today’s emotional flashback, cold shower and meds calmed me a bit for now (still crying tho)

I need to find a new job fr. a message about my schedule should not give me so much anxiety.