Bad Work Advice
@badworkadvice
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The fastest way to get ahead is taking shortcuts- Benjamin Franklin
Joined June 2014
When I know my sales call is going poorly, I play it off like I work for my company's competition #badworkadvice
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"Is that a new order? Or did I just waste a boner?" #badworkadvice
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Start a Twitter account about being shitty at work while at work...have your boss follow you #theframedpictureisaproblem #hr #badworkadvice
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First off, you don't actually work in sales until anytime you take any pill you're encouraged to snort it.
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When your coworkers ask what you're doing, reply with: "Hitting numbers all day, Skins all night" #Badworkdadvice
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Take off your shirt and eat donuts in the office lobby (bonus points if you have a #dadbod) #badworkadvice
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I've been one good sales day away from hitting my quote for 6 years now #badartwork #dowhatyouhateandyoullneverworkhardadayofyourlife
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Do an accurate product description for @SkyMall #badworkadvice
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Call in sick the day after a big sporting event #badworkadvice #OrangeOctober
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Use emojis when sending a prospecting email. #badworkadvice #😉
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End every bad sales call by asking if they kiss their mom with that mouth #badworkadvice
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use your company's twitter account to compare the long weekend to your boner, claiming ladies couldn't wear white either way#badworkadvice
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spend the majority of your VC money coming up with a way to Venmo strippers for lap dances #badworkadvice #goodlifeadvice
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Respond to every question by saying "cash rules everything around me" #Badworkadvice
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yell "the champ is here" every time you walk into the office #badworkadvice
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Do what you love to do (eat Cheetos) and never work a day in your life #Badworkadvice #badlifeadvice
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Spend all morning discussing your sexual conquests. Even if you're a gynecologist #badworkadvice
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Have "SEO and DTF" specialist on your business card. #badworkadvice
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