Bad Dad Jokes Profile
Bad Dad Jokes

@baddadjokes

Followers
57K
Following
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Media
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Statuses
575

I'm a Dad and I tell bad jokes.

Joined March 2011
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
8 years
Apparently you can’t use “beef stew” as a password. It’s not stroganoff. #dadjokes #JokeOfTheDay
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
There are too many black stereotypes.
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta #joketuesday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
What do you get if you stand between two llamas? Llamanated. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
Toasters were the first form of pop-up notifications. #dadjoke #jokeoftheday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
They don't watch the flintstones in Dubai. But Abu Dhabi do. #badjoke #dadjoke #joke
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
RT @TheMime: ...
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
I just read a book about Stockholm syndrome. It was pretty bad at first, but by the end I liked it. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
What did the buffalo say to his son as he left for college? Bison
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
Did you hear about the kidnapping at school? Its ok, he woke up.
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
I just ate a frozen apple. Hardcore. #DadmirationDay #FathersDay #dadjokes #HappyFathersDay
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
The shovel was a ground-breaking invention.
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
I wear a stethoscope so that in a medical emergency I can teach people a valuable lesson about assumptions. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
I've been addicted to cold turkey for 2 years. I keep telling people I'm trying to quit cold turkey but nobody is taking me seriously.
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
I used to have a job collecting leaves. I was raking it in. #dadjokes #jokeoftheday
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? Because they're so good at it.
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
My dad always told me “don’t be quick to find faults”... Good man, terrible geologist. #BadJokeFriday #dadjokes
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
What do you call an elephant that doesn't matter? An irrelephant
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
A classic from who's line is it anyway. #whoslineisitanyway
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@baddadjokes
Bad Dad Jokes
3 years
[Interview] "What are your strengths?" Me: I fall in love easily. "Okay... what are your weaknesses?" Me:Those blue eyes of yours. #dadjokes
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