😡fermion, PhD
@angryfermion
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that’s Dr.
@angryfermion
to you
no tweet today. im defending my PhD in physics tomorrow
everyone say good luck
@angryfermion
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you're in her dms, im in her phd dissertation acknowledgements. we are not the same
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A physics department at a major university in the US is now offering a semester long course on “string theory.”
Yes, you read that right.
String. The things kids make bracelets out of.
The dumbing down of America continues…
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academia is actively hostile to low income students
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boomers: artificial intelligence is going to kill us
artificial intelligence:
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physicists after discovering a new element that only lasts for 0.0000314 milliseconds, is lethally radioactive, and adds no value to society
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yeah i love STEM (sleeping, time for bed, extremely comfy sheets, mattresses)
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"you don't need to be good at math to study STEM"
that's because the M in STEM stands for meow meow meow, and only cats are allowed to study it
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mathematicians: dy/dx isn't a fraction
also mathematicians: \frac{dy}{dx}
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I just visited a physics PhD student at Harvard University.
One of the smartest people in the world.
Here’s their bedroom:
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what the heck?? just watched all of The Matrix movies and didn't see a single trace of an eigenvalue
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linear algebra isn't actually real. it was invented by mathematicians in 1925 to sell more eigenvalues
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STEM major: what are you learning in school?
kindergartener: colors and shapes
STEM major: lmao good luck getting a job with that
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knowledge is studying STEM, wisdom is realizing it's all just M
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Physics fact: the sky only appears blue because it's falling towards us and is blue-shifted
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jesus feeding 5000 people with five loaves and two fish is just another example of the banach tarski paradox
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why don't phd students go to the gym?
because the curl of a grad is zero
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i said "degrees kelvin" in thermodynamics class and they took me out back and shot me
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My friend is a PhD student at MIT. One of the smartest people in the world.
Has published papers on theoretical physics.
This is his closet:
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when you do a long calculation and terms start canceling
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phd students be like "i know my worth"
and then make $30k in grad school
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them: what do you do for a living?
me: i study physics
them: i always hated physics
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Fellas if she
- tells you to normalize her behavior
- says she's going through a phase
- keeps you guessing about where she is
that ain't your girl, that's a wavefunction
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just found out Taylor Swift did NOT invent Taylor series
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physicists when quantum computers do something useless faster than classical computers
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mathematicians are deranged beyond belief
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studying quantum physics was a mistake
humans were never supposed to understand spin
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machine learning isn't actually real. it was invented by mathematicians in 1959 to sell more eigenvalues
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By age 30 you should have learned, forgotten, and relearned how to make subplots using matplotlib
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I just visited a physics PhD student at MIT.
One of the smartest people in the world.
Here’s their bedroom:
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no tweet today. im defending my PhD in physics tomorrow
everyone say good luck
@angryfermion
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when you're doing a long calculation and terms start canceling
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the sexiest thing a woman can do is get a PhD in physics
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studying physics was a mistake
humans were never supposed to understand spin
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imagine carrying a child for 9 months just to have them major in mathematics
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"physics is more of an art than a science"
-guy who just learned you can change the default matplotlib colors
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if i had an eigenvalue for every time i heard this joke
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math profesor: the real analysis exam will be closed book
student: closed doesn't imply not open
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Peppa Pig has unified gravity and quantum mechanics
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new idea: physics but with none of the math. we'll call it chemistry
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physicists: i love physics, you never have to memorize anything!
physics:
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behind every hot girl is a deep desire to study theoretical physics
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quantum mechanics isn't actually real. it was invented by physicists in 1925 to sell more eigenvalues
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just found out Taylor Swift did NOT discover Taylor series
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behind every hot girl is a deep desire to get PhD in theoretical physics
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yeah sex is cool but have you ever found the perfect u substitution for an integral?
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calculus isn't real, it was invented in 1930 by mathematicians to sell more integrals
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profesor: the online analysis exam will be closed book
student: closed doesn't imply not open
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quantum computing researchers when their 4 qubits calculates 1 + 1 = 2 with 70% accuracy
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me when i look up who advised my PhD advisor's advisor
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in math, we don't say "everyone has a soulmate"
instead we say "for every ε > 0, there exists a δ > 0 such that
|f(x)-f(x0)| < ε whenever |x-x0| < δ"
and i think that's beautiful
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the cat isnt really dead or alive its just an metaphor to describe linear combinations of vectors over the complex numbers
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imagine carrying a child for 9 months just to have him major in physics
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"physics is more of an art than a science"
-guy who learned you can change the default matplotlib colors
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“you have a physics degree” i whisper as i'm crying, struggling to add an 18% tip to my bill without a calculator
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if i had an eigenvector for every time i heard this joke
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there is love without sex
there is sex without love
and there's STEM majors without both
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in mathematics, we don't say "everyone has a soulmate"
instead we say "for every ε > 0, there exists a δ > 0 such that
|f(x)-f(x0)| < ε whenever |x-x0| < δ"
and i think that's beautiful
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the sluttiest thing a man can do is diagonalize a matrix
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in physics, they don't say "i love you"
instead they say "every matrix is invertible and diagonalizable,"
and i think that's beautiful
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what the heck?? just watched all of The Matrix movies and didn't see a singular eigenvalue
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therapists be like "you're projecting"
umm onto which subspace???
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STEM majors be like "i know my worth"
and then only make $30k in grad school
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them: what do you do for work?
me: i study physics
them: i always hated physics
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knowledge is majoring in STEM
wisdom is realizing it's all just M
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did it hurt? when you learned less than 1% of phd students become tenure track professors?
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"im a himbo"
fella you're literally a PhD candidate in theoretical physics
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quantum physicists when they have a 0.0000001% statistically significant deviation from theory
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