Not Jerome Powell
@alifarhat79
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Not associated with the Federal Reserve. Financial Parody and sarcasm, control of the world’s liquidity. Not investment advice
Joined January 2010
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Last Seen Profiles
Pinned Tweet
It looks like Boeing hit squad is the most efficient team they have
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Jeffrey Epstein: Can you come tonight?
Stephen Hawking: I can’t. I’m doing a very important research on black hole radiation.
Epstein: We got midgets though.
Hawking:
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MARK ZUCKERBERG
2004 - Steals Facebook
2016 - Copies Snapchat (Instagram Stories)
2020 - Copies TikTok (Instagram Reels)
2023 - Copies Twitter
2024 - Copies Space X
2025 - Changes name to Elon Musk
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Boomers selling their homes for $2 million after buying them in 1969 for 7 raspberries
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Sam Bankman-Fried: I don’t know where $10 billion dollars went
The Pentagon: We don’t know where $2.2 trillion dollars went
The IRS: You just sent $601.37 don’t forget to report it.
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Smashing capitalism with a $12 Starbucks, $200 Ray-Bans and $2,000 MacBook
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How you make $6.2 billion dollars?
1- Tell the CIA you’re planning a coup on Russia
2- Take $6.2 billion dollars
3- Don’t do shit.
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Elon Musk: China will never be able to replicate our technology.
China:
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If you buy a $50k electric vehicle to save $80 a month on gas you’ll need 52 years to break even.
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Be safe y’all. I had 2 Boeing flight tickets sitting in my car, someone broke in and left 2 more
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Show me a man that gets rich by being a politician and I'll show you a crook. -Harry Truman
Nancy Pelosi
Annual salary: $223,000
Net worth: $202 million
Mitch McConnell
Annual salary: $200,000
Net worth: $95 million
Chuck Schumer
Annual salary: $210,000
Net worth: $75…
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If you buy a $50k electric vehicle to save $80 a month on gas you’ll need 52 years to break even.
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If you’re having a bad year cause you lost a lot of money in the market remember that Elon Musk has lost $200 billion and is still making jokes on twitter
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When you get a 5% raise but remember inflation is 7.9%
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Zelensky was the highest paid actor in 2022. He got $18 billion dollars
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BREAKING: Elon Musk was reportedly working on some anti aging formula but it got way out of hand
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Don’t forget to add Zelensky as a dependent when filing taxes this year.
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BREAKING: THE FEDERAL RESERVE CHANGES NAME TO PRINTA
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The White House: We’re unable to track $6.2 billion dollars sent to Ukraine.
California: We’re unable to track $24 billion dollars spent to combat homelessness.
The Pentagon: We’re unable to track $2.3 trillion dollars of military spending.
The U.S. Treasury: We’re unable to…
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The Pentagon: We don’t know where $2.3 trillion went.
The White House: We don’t know where $6.2 billion went.
The U.S. Navy: We don’t know where an F-35 fighter jet went.
The IRS: We know where that $601 went, report it if you don’t want to end in jail.
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BlackRock after successfully outbidding a single mother of 4 in the housing market
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The FBI searching for traces of cocaine at the White House
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If you invested $10,000 in bitcoin 3 years ago you’d have $10,000 now.
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The Simpsons predicted the Apple Vision Pro. Unreal!
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Someone paid $8 for Twitter blue and wiped out $15 billion in market cap from a big pharmaceutical company
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BREAKING: HAWAII CHANGES NAME TO UKRAINE TO RECEIVE FASTER AID FROM THE GOVERNMENT
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The Pentagon: We’re unable to track $2.3 billion dollars of military spending.
The U.S. Treasury: We’re unable to track $5 trillion dollars of pandemic spending.
The IRS: You owe us $3.37 pay it or you’re going to jail.
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Show me a man that gets rich by being a politician and I'll show you a crook. -Harry Truman
Nancy Pelosi
Annual salary: $223,000
Net worth: $202 million
Mitch McConnell
Annual salary: $200,000
Net worth: $95 million
Chuck Schumer
Annual salary: $210,000
Net worth: $75…
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Therapists as soon as they see a girl with blue hair walking in
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The Pentagon: We don’t know where $6.2 billion went.
The CIA: We don’t know where $6.2 billion went.
The White House: We don’t know where $6.2 billion went.
Twitter:
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Plot twist: Prigozhin was approached by the US to do a coup in Russia for billions of dollars. He tells Putin about it, Putin agrees. They keep the money.
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My friend was losing money trading until he bought a second screen. Now he’s losing money twice as fast
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This is not Bitcoin, Ethereum or even a shitcoin. It’s Paypal
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JP Morgan: We mistakenly deleted 47 million records
The Pentagon: We mistakenly sent $6.2 billion to Ukraine
The Fed: We mistakenly printed $32 trillion dollars
Where does it stop?
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The Pentagon: We’re unable to track $3.8 trillion dollars of military spending.
The U.S. Treasury: We’re unable to track $5 trillion dollars of pandemic spending.
The Navy: We’re unable to track where a $30 million F-35 fighter jet went.
The IRS: You owe us $3.37 pay it right…
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World leaders arrive in their private jets to talk about the imminent risks of climate change to our planet
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See you in court Mr. President
🚨BREAKING: US Supreme Court rules public can sue officials who block, mute them on social media
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Global debt is $305 trillion… who the fuck we owe? Uranus?
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Bill Gates visited Epstein Island 36 times but refuses to pay $8 for twitter blue
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The White House: We don’t know where $6.2 billion went.
Twitter:
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If you invested $10,000 in gold 10 years ago you would’ve had $10,000 now. Excellent strategy
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My money was losing 7% every year due to inflation so I decided to invest it in the stock market. Now I’m losing 7% every day.
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My money was losing 8.6% every year due to inflation so I decided to invest it in the stock market. Now I’m losing 8.6% every day.
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U.S. presidents net worth before and after office:
Ronald Reagan: $10.6M ➡️ $15.4M
George H.W. Bush: $4M ➡️ $23M
Bill Clinton: $1.3M ➡️ $241.5M
George W. Bush: $20M ➡️ $40M
Barack Obama: $1.3M ➡️ $70M
Donald Trump: $3.7B ➡️ $2.5B
Numbers don’t lie.
What are your thoughts…
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The U.S. dollar isn’t even backed by anything.
The U.S. dollar:
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Ok babe our contract ends here. Hope you have a great life
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Smashing capitalism with a $12 Starbucks, $200 Ray-Bans and a $1,500 MacBook
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