#8
@_JoeAlexanderr
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Last Seen Profiles
We sold Tomori (better than Sarr and Christensen) and Guehi (better than Sarr and Christensen) to fund Lukaku (worse than Tammy Abraham, who we also sold).
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I think Thiago Silva the best free transfer of all time. He definitely has a credible argument.
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Tammy Abraham out-scoring every striker Chelsea have had post Costa in two different leagues, 3 times. Quite remarkable, and by remarkable I mean we’re idiots.
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Mount now has a goal or assist at the San Siro, Wembley, Bernabeau, Wanda, and the Dragao, all before 23.
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Mount is going to have a 20 G/A season with only 1 penalty. What an absurdly good player.
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Chelsea are the funniest club in the world. Transfer ban, sack Frank Lampard, win the Champions league with Tuchel, club sanctioned, club up for sale, player exodus. Viva La Cobham, I guess.
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This is what a world class footballer looks like. No ‘he needs time’, no ‘it’s a dysfunctional side’, nothing. It’s been 7 months in his first start and he runs a whole midfield, creates more chances than forwards and locks it down in transition.
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So it’s Harry Kane to Chelsea in a Premier League shattering deal then.
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Christensen locked up La Liga’s top scorer and Mount showed Felix levels. Don’t chat to Cobham please.
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I miss Thomas Tuchel’s clean-sheet Blues. Take me back, nothing made me happier than 1-0 and 2-0s.
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RLC and Mount won’t get plaudits because they didn’t score but they’ve shut down the Milan midfield and created chances in/out of transitions.
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Lampard got T4 without spending a penny, mind you. Just some thoughts.
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I really want a Liverpool-Chelsea Champions League knockout tie. Those were *the* games legends were made out of.
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Werner/Lukaku as a front two have looked more dangerous in 30 minutes than every other permutation we’ve used in 5 games.
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What a shit precedent we’ve set, Guehi, Tomori and Colwill gone in 12 months. Only to splash money on… wait for it, former academy centre back Ake who’s not as good as any of them.
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Kanté really rocked up and dominated every single midfield in the Champions League. Every system every profile, he really outshone them all. Proper generational talent mind you.
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We don’t even have a City or Liverpool type super team. We just have a super coach.
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Lukaku looks like he’s in his Everton physique, it’s about to get scary for the rest of the league.
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Mason Mount is now tied for Chelsea’s top scorer this season along with Tammy Abraham, curious that.
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I’m genuinely offended Pep cried real tears saying they can’t replace Aguero only for him to blow 100M on Harry Kane.
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Tuchel is one hell of a coach. He out-coached Klopp outright, had both his wingbacks out and the Lukaku debacle. Players did themselves well.
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Drogba in the Lukaku announcement video will have a grown man shedding tears.
@ChelseaFC
it’s too simple to mess up.
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The Tammy buy-back is sounding better after every Chelsea game. That and he’s scoring for Roma, as he did for Chelsea when given the chance.
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Chelsea are the Champions of Europe and the narratives were so so sweet. Mount had an open play assist in the biggest game of his career. Havertz scores the winner after months of being written off.
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I’m so so so so sorry. I’m sorry.
This is one of the most difficult statements I have ever had to write - and it is one which I hoped I would not need to do for many years. I am devastated that my time at Chelsea has come to an end.
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It it me or is Edouard Mendy still shockingly underrated? By all accounts he should be recognized as a top five goal keeper in the world - strange he isn’t.
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Broja is built like a traditional 9 with legitimately elite mobility. Great ball striking too, sky’s the limit.
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Just clocked we really uncovered another Mr. Chelsea in Mason Mount. Future captain for a decade and nothing makes me happier.
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Tuchel switching to a midfield 3 and we hit them for four… Interesting.
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If Drogba isn’t in the Lukaku announcement video I’m reporting it and deservedly so.
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With Mount out, surely Tuchel goes Lukaku-Werner up top, packs midfield and hits the channels. Conte smiling down from the Amalfi coast, lol.
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Mason Mount on the Ballon D’or shortlist. I’m going to be unbearable, if I’m not already. He’s a 22-year old from Cobham, that’s such a massive achievement for the academy man.
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Badiashile is a titan by the way. Debut in a struggling side devoid of confidence but never lost his head or made rash decisions. Technically he’s a flawless passer long or short, super impressed.
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Tuchel can always count on Mason Mount. Just like Mourinho could always count on Frank.
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Mount is so obviously the Chelsea POTY. Stop being edgy for the sake of it, he’s been our best player outright.
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Chelsea having 12 first team injuries in mid-September is one of the most staggering things I’ve ever seen.
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How many big game clinics does he have this season? 5 or 6 now? It’s unfathomable that someone who does just about everything to an extremely high level is not rated internally/externally.
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This Champions league final rewatch is hitting. Tuchel is a proper genius, easily a T3 coach in the world. We rotated between a 4-3-3, 5-4-1, 5-3-2 and a 4-2-4 in the first half alone.
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Are we… the best team in Europe? I’d wager yes. Best depth, best coach, best defence.
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Chelsea fans STILL haven’t caught on to Tuchel starting Mount almost every game fit or not. Some must be borderline senile after 18 months.
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How can you be a Chelsea fan and not root for Chelsea players. Believe it or not, Chelsea’s academy players are indeed Chelsea players. They’re damn fantastic ones at that.
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Selling Broja will be a monumental mistake. How many similar profiles can you say there are in the game today? Make the room in the squad and rotate him in, it’s simple.
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Enzo is unironically worth 200 million. Creates in transition, vs settled blocks, from deep, from wide. Also he almost always pitches in with team leading tackles/int. numbers. It’s ridiculous.
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Let’s be absolutely serious here, flawless from Pochettino and 10/11 players. Game shifted after a mistake and it is what it is.
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That was as dominant a performance I’ve seen in a while. Thomas Tuchel has now comprehensively beaten Guardiola, Klopp, Conte, Simeone, and Zidane as Chelsea boss in 12 months.
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Looks like Broja has a very honest shot at being our
#9
next season, as he should. At the *very* least, he’s aggressive, hungry and plays with intensity. And he can actually score.
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There has never been a clearer case of gross mismanagement in the history of any sport than what Clearlake Capital have done to Chelsea Football Club.
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All that talk during the week only for him to run the game with a man down, takes the sting out of changing game states, breaks lines and now scoring. He’s a top top top player
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He’s 6 away from being the best goal scorer since Costa… I mean even after all the antics he’s still the best forward we have.
Chelsea's top-scorers in each of the last six seasons:
▪️ 16/17 = Diego Costa (20)
▪️ 17/18 = Eden Hazard (17)
▪️ 18/19 = Eden Hazard (21)
▪️ 19/20 = Tammy Abraham (18)
▪️ 20/21 = Abraham x Werner (12)
▪️ 21/22 = Romelu Lukaku (15)
Rom could still keep climbing. 🪜
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Regardless of what signings we make, Havertz will light up the Premier League next season. Haven’t seen space interpretation, deftness of touch and finishing like that since Lampard.
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Gallagher showing Arsenal’s midfield and ‘best young players in the league’ how to play. Can’t say I’m surprised, but I am smug.
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Perhaps my favourite mirrored images of all time. Both at the Emirates and both followed by their midfield counterparts.
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He’s world class let’s keep it real.
Mason Mount for Chelsea vs. West Ham:
◎ Most touches (91)
◎ =Most ball recoveries (8)
◎ =Most shots (6)
◎ =Most tackles (4)
◎ Most shots on target (3)
◎ =Most chances created (3)
◎ =Most take-ons completed (3)
◎ =Most blocks (1)
Wow.
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That’s a titans performance, marshalled the entire back line and his ball playing/line splitting was on full display. He’s becoming as classic a Chelsea centre back as I’ve ever seen one.
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Mount and Havertz as the two
#10s
with Lukaku up top, it’ll be a privilege to watch. I think it also means CHO will get a lot of minutes at RWB - basically Conte’s 4-2-4.
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I just feel bad for Tuchel. Never have I seen a manager worth so much, have players who don’t match the ambition or ability.
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I genuinely feel bad for Tuchel at this point. Blokes done everything right in all our big games and then has Werner up top scuffing 1.0 xG tap ins.
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I’m coming round to Jorginho man. That picture of him celebrating yesterday was so wholesome after the levels of performances he’s hit since Tuchel arrived.
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Perisic is a shrewd signing, low risk high reward which is ideal. Experienced pro as we’re losing a bunch and unlike most players leaving, he’s actually good.
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Chalobah by far the best player on the pitch. To think a certain coach froze him out for… absolutely no reason!
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Rudiger and Christensen want to be paid like superstars, don’t kill me today. Silva at 37 is the ONLY one who was worth his status.
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If Havertz is signed by Chelsea he’ll be mentored by the greatest advanced central midfielder in Premier League history. Late runs, positioning, discipline, IQ etc. He’ll perfect the art.
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Project Havertz centre forward it is. Regardless of who we do or do not sign, you’d be hard pressed to find a 6’4 frame with burst and an eye for goal and upper echelon linkup play, oh and he’s only 21.
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The cheek of any Chelsea fan to turns their noses up at Lukaku, you lot are funny man. He immediately out performs our entire shoddy front line by a healthy margin.
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We’ve lost once in 27 games, have made it to the latter stages of every single competition and our two fullbacks out for months. But, apparently, we aren’t good, the wheels are coming off etc. I mean, sure.
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Amidst the rain Cobham set the pitch on fire today. CHO, Chalobah, RLC and Mount were all outstanding.
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I genuinely and from the bottom of my heart can’t wait to see Pep gone. Just leave already man, enough.
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Managers being hired at Chelsea and instantly becoming hyper-pragmatic is the most classic move maybe ever.
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I’m so excited by the Lukaku signing because he’s Chelsea through and through. There’s something about signing a player who has unwavering love for your club that hits.
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Broja is physically gifted beyond belief. If he learns some combination play, and how to hold it up he’s a 20 goal a season forward.
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What English attacker has come back from the Euros on form? Mount, Kane, Sancho, even Grealish and Sterling look a tad off their normal levels.
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I don’t see how Chelsea can lose in the Raphinha situation. If Barca sign Raphinha, Chelsea get Dembele. If they don’t, we sign Raphinha. It’s a win win regardless.
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Shoutout to Colwill & Disasi, that’s what a backline should do. Covered channels, won duels aerially and ground + held the offside trap perfectly.
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Graham Potter learned a very valuable lesson today. Your £110M worth of centre backs were bought for a very very good reason.
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I reckon I’ve watched about 8 hours worth of replays so far. I can’t believe we’re the Kings of Europe, again.
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Kai Havertz is a system, he’s a central controller in the final third who can finish like a centre forward and pass like a midfielder. Give him runners and he wins you games.
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Well at least as a Chelsea fan I can relax knowing Wan-Bissaka plays fullback for United. Imagine Ronaldo with Reece or Trent, dear me.
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Nico is the £75 million striker Chelsea have been wanting. You’ll be hard pressed to find a better channel mover in the PL.
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Watching Werner as a touchline winger is deeply saddening, almost soul crushing at times.
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Chelsea fans crying about winning ugly again? Get over it, we’re winning crucial games.
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Mount top three in the Premier League for goal involvements. He is an outright superstar now.
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I think only Chelsea fans realize his quality at the moment. I think I sorely underestimated his on ball actions, he’s an expert in the buildup, one time passes into space, breaking lines, 1/2’s to evade pressure, back to play etc.
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Tuchel definitely has the boards backing over this Lukaku issue. I remember Ancelotti being outright forced to play Torres, Lamps got it with the Kai/Timo too.
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Chelsea committing over £250 million to Raheem Sterling, Koulibaly and Cucurella will no doubt go down as one of the worst windows in the modern era.
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