In keeping with Facebook, Twitter, AIM, Instagram, Google+, MySpace, Twitch, Orkut, Pinterest, and all other online social networks, I am banning Donald Trump from my weekly online D&D game.

D4s in this house There’s d4s in this house I said certified geek, play seven days a week Roll at disadvantage, make that saving throw weak. #WAP #DnD

Are they marketing directly to you now, @GwynnAndTonic?

One of the great things about my group is that even when things are totally made up at the last second like that, I just need to provide a little framework and they take off and are having fun and fully engaged. Bonus: I didn’t disintegrate the new person on her first night.

Oh no. DM switch at the last minute for weekly game. Ok gang, you are going to jump into this other plane for reasons and, umm, *looks at minis* fight beholder-kin in a *looks at lack of maps drawn up* network of caves shaped like a beholder. Tada!

A confused cleric who reanimates fallen party members rather than reviving them. #terribledndcharacterideas

A Kenku of any class who, thanks to mimicry, only speaks in Trump tweets. #terribledndcharacterideas

Along that same line, a thread of #terribledndcharacterideas:

Sometimes when playing in a one-shot #dnd session, things end up getting a little silly when it comes to character creation. Case in point: A very dumb blue dragonborn who got the words cobalt and Kobold mixed up and thinks he’s the wrong race. #terribledndcharacterideas

Our party, including @Breakfastthief and @GwynnAndTonic fought bravely and wisely. Despite some brushes with death, we came away victorious. I can’t wait to see where the next portion of this campaign takes us. 2/2

Last night, our group battle the BBEG and concluded a plot arc that has been going on for over two years of (mostly) weekly games. @tvanburen Planned the battle and ran it amazingly, including the surprise second map. 1/2

I’m GUTT. I don’t think I like this game.

This is the type of thing that makes me wish I could draw. I can see this in my head but can’t show anyone my vision.

Last night’s #DnD session provoked a terrible (wonderful) character idea: Loxodon Fighter who dual-wields hand crossbows, using his trunk to reload. I imagine him running around, jumping and firing his crossbows like Chow Yun-Fat in John Woo film.

At our weekly #DnD game Tuesday night, I began by asking who had seen #Endgame, then told them I’d mercilessly kill their characters if they said any spoilers. Now I’m all caught up, and they’re safe…from me. One character still almost died when he chugged a thing of poison.

Sound familiar? #DnD

Seriously, this is getting out of hand now. I’ve gotten four more notifications since I took that screenshot.

I’m sure it says something about the stage of life I’m in that when my phone is blowing up, it’s one of two things: It’s @tvanburen, @GwynnAndTonic, @Breakfastthief sending messages on our #DND group text or it’s the tufted titmouse on my bird feeder camera.

https://t.co/KxO9I3B91i

“Well, this is disturbing.” Going out with a sardonic comment. I’m going to die the way I lived.