Author. Speaker Yvette Ratshikhopha🇵🇸📚🌍
@Yvette_Aloe
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2× Author| Award winning Life & Leadership Coach |MD @Rootedwell_za . Key Note Speaker| wellness| IG: @yvette_aloe |bookings hello @yvettealoe .co.za
Johannesburg, South Africa
Joined June 2011
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Last Seen Profiles
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Hey beloveds,
My new book Coming Home To Yourself comes out next month, it is a book and journal written to help increase your self-awareness, reflect, understand your needs,& love yourself better.
Click on the link below to order your copy. 💕 :
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"Diamonds are made under pressure"
But I am not a diamond, I am a human being with emotions, and I can also thrive under balance and gentleness.
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Just a reminder that your soul mate is someone who wants to be with you just as much as you want to be with them. Not this thing where you must decode a persons feelings & interest in you. Your soul mate will choose you.
omg the story of how colman domingo met his husband is just so incredible and precious ♥️
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The issue here is language and tonality, which makes a huge difference in how a message is received. " Dear parents, braiding can take anything from 4-6 hours, please remember bring your kids with snacks so that they don't get hungry." Many people ruin their business because-
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Try Namibia instead, same flight cost,less racism,lovely beaches and more things to do. 💛
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Miss Jada said it: " Not everybody you love is meant to be the person you build a life with, sometimes you gotta love them from over there. " 😩
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My toxic trait is that I can't sleep without a blanket or something covering me up, even in a heat wave.
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Gentle parenting is actually about you learning to manage your anger and emotions, you working on your communication style, you learning to affirm more than you criticize, you learning to be patient, gentle parenting isn't just about the kids,it starts with reparenting yourself.
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When Michelle Obama was asked in an interview how her kids are doing she responded: "They are doing well, they are empathetic, they have compassion and have a strong connection with each other."
I love that she only focused on their wellbeing, & not their achievements.
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You can tell Elsa has a strong amount of self confidence and self belief, and she genuinely expects good things to happen to her. As a result she is able to attract and create a beautiful life and wonderful experiences. Do not underestimate the power of believing in yourself.
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They don't invest their time and energy in learning brand communication, even though they have a great service offering.
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Starting a business isn't for everyone, having kids isn't for everyone, being in a 9-5 isn't for everyone, travel or solo dates aren't for everyone, monogamy isn't for everyone. Let people live their lives without projecting your standards & desires on to them.
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Sometimes we partake in our own suffering by doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results.
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Wherever there is a loss:
A loss of a job,
A loss of a relationship,
And even a loss of self,
There is a new beginning and an opportunity to create, embrace the new season and know that you have all the power to create the life you want.
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Do you guys still pray before travelling long distance trips?
I still do.
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I am going to frame this comment 😭😂
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It's going to be very hard to use gentle parenting on your kids when you are so hard on yourself. You have to heal the parts of you that were not given patience and not allowed to make mistakes or were made to feel like you are not good enough in order to give that to them.
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Stop carrying peoples opinions about you as truth. People say things to us and we carry them as part of our identity, It is up to us to discard these and discover our own truths, only we can create and define who we are.
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You can grow up in the same household and have completely different childhood experiences.
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On top of this, as a service provider you can also see opportunity in this and sell snack packs for kids & encourage parents to purchase them before they leave. Some salons keep water and snacks for this reason.
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Don't overlook red flags because you want to get married.
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I genuinely believe that God sends certain people in your life just to love you. To love you purely, to love you whole heartedly, to love you with good intention. To hold space for you, to see you. I am grateful for that.
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Children need happy parents more than they need parents to stay together "for their sake".
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Mpumalanga is one of the most beautiful places in South Africa. A true gem.
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When manifesting a holiday buy a travel bag, When manifesting a farm buy some seeds, when manifesting a house start designing your interior, when manifesting gigs get your profile & rates ready, when manifesting a healthy relationship love yourself.
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Accept that you and your siblings may not have the same experience of your parents, and that the one's experience doesn't invalidate the others experience.
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I think that our ancestors understood energy more than we know. This is why we were not allowed to borrow people's clothes and I also believe that this is why pregnancies are not shared and new born babies aren't allowed to be seen. It was an energy thing.
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Most women were conditioned to date one person at a time while the other gender gets to explore and see what works for them & who is more aligned to them. I highly recommend multi dating, see what's out there, it helps you know your preferences, & increases your sense of CHOICE…
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Make a habit of writing down the things you want to see in your life. Write them in detail, with specific dates, and see what happens.
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When dating, really take your time to figure out if a person is worth all your effort. Especially if you have a pattern of giving your all to people who give you the bare minimum, or just enough to hook you. Not everyone deserves all your effort.
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Affirm:
I am worthy of everything that I am trying to manifest.
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If you are a young South African and want to follow politics from another young person who is well informed & relatable, here is someone you can watch instead.
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As a parent, please take the kids to the salon with snacks, it makes them more comfortable and less fussy. I always do this with my nieces, especially if they are getting braids or something that takes long.
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The most underrated feeling is feeling like yourself again after a tough season.
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When joy calls your name, even if it is for a moment, answer. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to laugh and live in the moment. Be present for your joy, honour it just as you have honoured your pain.
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I found the most beautiful black owned wedding and events venue in Bronkhorstspruit just about 40-50 minutes from Pretoria, it's called Meander Estate🥰. They also have lovely accommodation and really great service. Let's support them beloveds.
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Don't let anyone tell you that "there are plenty of people doing that already" There were plenty of scientists when Einstein came up with the theory of relativity. Plenty of Talk show hosts before Oprah. Non of those "Plenty of people" are you, and that is what sets you apart.
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Stores remind you to do things all the time " Please remember to take out your loyalty card before you reach the till", please do note that we do not take cash"
not
" If you only have cash, you will go home empty handed, this ain't 1942"
Tonality matters.
Ends.
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I pray God meets you where you are, and carries you through this season.
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Adults like doing things to kids that they wouldn't like done to them. If u did something that your spouse doesn't like & he shaved your head how would u feel? If u messed up at work & your boss slapped you how would u feel? Children have emotions just like you. Let's do better.
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A parenting style where your child is not allowed to have an opinion, not allowed to speak up, not allowed to be themselves, or not allowed to make mistakes is not parenting. It's something else. People have to stop oppressing children to make life easier for themselves.
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The quality of any relationship is more important than it's duration.
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Life doesn't end in December and begin again in January, it's a continuation. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself.
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Imagine starting your education under a tree and then ending up the Vice Chancellor of UCT. Black people in South Africa are literally walking miracles.
Under a whole tree guys. A tree.
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Adulting requires a lot of acceptance. The more you resist change, the more discomfort you experience in your journey.
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Feeling safe in a relationship is very important. Safe to confide, safe to be yourself, safe to place your heart. You should feel safe in a relationship.
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The quickest way to change your life is to break the behavioural patterns that are holding you back. If you want a different life, start doing things differently.
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At some point you will have to stop this thing of living a half hearted life cause you fear that something will go wrong.
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Also, I literally said the same thing she said, just with a different tone, both messages are a reminder. If her clientele is happy with that tone then that's fine, if you don't mind the tonality then that's on you. This is my opinion.
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You can learn a lot on twitter, if you are intentional about following the right people.
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Start creating room for what you have been praying for.
This is your season.
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Create a home within yourself so that you always have yourself to return to.
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May the next 6 months be full of statements like:
"I am proud to announce..."
"I got the Job...."
"Please congratulate me..."
"I'm graduating..."
"I've partnered with..."
"I won the pitch..." and
"I got the funding..."
Amen.
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Being with someone who understands you, accepts you and caters for you in a way that speaks to you is such a win. Thoughtfulness goes a long way, but thoughtfullness based on who you are? Is such a blessing.
My wife didn’t want a bay shower so I mixed it up a little to something she’d be more comfortable with lol. Had her and the girls pampered for two hours and myself and the boys make food and drink. Then a massive lunch into the evening with song and games. Sabu gender reveal
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Please suggest a book that helped your mental and spiritual journey in the comments. 👇🏽
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Consistency is also a love language.
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Money loves me, It comes to me with ease.🤗
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You gotta stop believing that suffering is needed for growth. Some suffering is created by the choices that we make and a refusal to accept what we need to accept.
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Overextending yourself a LOT can build up resentment, especially when you expect other people to do the same but bona they choose themselves or just don't operate like that.
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Learn to seperate your worth from other people's decisions. Someone not choosing you, liking you or accepting you, has nothing to do with your worth.
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Do right by yourself this year,find the courage to do what is best for you.
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Forgive yourself for allowing people to treat you in a terrible manner, Set some new boundaries and move on with your life. Now that you know better, do better.
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Realise this. You cannot have big dreams and still be playing it small. You cannot achieve greatness whilst being involved in mediocre deeds. You cannot want progress and be stagnant. Your actions have to be aligned with the life you want to create for yourself.
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Intimacy starts with being present, it doesn't start in the bedroom.
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No amount of communication strategies can make up for someone who just doesn't want to hear or understand you.
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The tone and words you use when you speak to your kids will one day be their inner voice. Choose your words consciously, respond mindfully.
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Blocking, muting or unfollolowing people on social media is also setting a boundary. You have nothing to prove to strangers on the internet.
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I don't know who needs to hear this but, update your vision board.
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You guys do understand that all some people want is to have children & focus on them & have a family right? Not to work,not to be on a forbes list,& they choose a partner who affords them that, we have to stop projecting our desires & making assumptions about people's lives.
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Reciprocation is important in friendships too.
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Date someone who is comfortable talking about a future with you. Someone who doesn't make you feel like you are asking for too much when you request clarity and consistency.
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Don't carry the shame of what someone else did to you.
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Trauma Bonding VS Authentic Bonding
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People who are loved and accepted at home often move through rejection from others with more ease, they internalise it less because they know they are absolutely lovable. How you love your kids as a parent makes all the difference in how they cope in other relationships.
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I think my love language is deep conversation. There is something about someone listening to you, paying attention and being fully present. That makes me feel really loved.
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Not planning an actual date, just "when can I see you" type of person.
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Congratulations in advance to you for that job, that house, that business, that massive cheque and that relationship that you want.
Everything you want is already making its way to you.
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Relationships reveal to you the parts of yourself that you need to heal, pay attention, or the pattern repeats itself in another relationship.
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Ladies, date. Expand your horizons, see what is out there, see what people have to offer. We women go on one date and give our hearts completely. Dating helps you know what you want and what is out there & we often settle because we don't even know what's out there.
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5 things to work on that will help you improve your quality of life.
1. Work on your sleeping patterns.
2. Work on your eating patterns.
3. Work on your morning and night routine.
4. Observe your thoughts without judgement.
5. Be more present.
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Shudu really completed her honours degree, while writing a children's book and being Miss SA. What a focused queen. She also continues to do community work through her non profit organisation.
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This if you accept it, eventually conditions you for bread crumbing. You become so used to them disappointing you that you are grateful for the little attention they give you. And they know you will stick around even when they are unreliable.
My sister’s boyfriend said he was gonna come pick her up for a date at 18:00. The time is currently 21:17 and my girl is still sitting here🤣
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One day you will feel like yourself again, you will be excited about life again, you will have new ideas and hope for the future. Until that day comes, take it one day at a time, give each day your best and be kind to yourself.
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Affirm:
Abundance loves me, it follows me everywhere I go.
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Goddess level unlocked. Thank you to my baby for choosing me, for bringing me closer to my intuition, for putting me into a place where a new version of me can emerge. I welcome every change with gratitude. My life and body will never be the same, and I am grateful. 💛✨
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It will end in healing and abundance. 🕯️
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Affirm:
Things are always falling into place for me.
I am a magnet of everything good.
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Stop looking for home in other people and create it within yourself, create a safe space in your internal dialogue, deal with yourself with all the gentleness and get comfortable in your own skin.
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I cannot put enough emphasis on this: have a life outside of your relationship and outside of your work. You need an external support system and you need balance.
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Affirm:
I am.worthy of the life that I am trying to create. I deserve it all.
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Short tempered parents raise anxious children.
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Don't over spiritualise things that need you to get up and do the work.
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I used to get teased a lot about my facial features growing up, everything from the size of my nose to the size of my teeth & my big smile was teased, so when I cut my hair last month it was an act of defiance saying hey look at me, not only am I beautiful. I am enough.
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Some people come into your life to show you the kind of love that you deserve. The relationship may come to an end for whatever reason but that was their purpose. To show you that the kind of love you want is available to you.
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I pray for alignment, I pray for good things to happen to me, I pray for more life in all experiences, I pray for courage and self belief, I pray for acceptance of good things, I pray for grace for self, I pray for the ability to be present through it all.
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Unfortunately, you can't build relationship without being vulnerable.
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Sometimes the spaces you fight so hard to be accepted in are not even worthy of your energy.
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