July 6, 2028 looks real bad for me, I’ll update in 2 years, 4 months and 19 days

Just finding out I accidentally left my phone in sleep focus mode for like 3 days and didn’t even notice

Does smoking in your car feel really cool

Dropped a glass bottle of Topo Chico (Twist of Lime) at the store self-checkout Popped off like a firearm, exploding glass shrapnel, I yelped “Oh no” Everyone gathered around me to make sure I was okay, I started to sweat They made me stop picking up the glass with my bare

IT Director and I share the same birthday (other than the year) surely this Virgo king understands my admiration of nostalgic media

Yesterday morning, in a relatively vulnerable state, I saw a HUGE black spider violently skitter across the floor in my bathroom. I was absolutely horrified. My mistake was that I then left the bathroom to go arm myself - I was unable to find him again. It is now Day 2 of

Humiliation of IT director in-person requesting your password to set up MFA, and it is a reference to an ancient 2005 meme First off I thought you weren’t allowed to ask me for that

I don’t care to be good, sheriff I care to be whole

You’re annoying me

I need ‘whatever-it-is’ to stay out of my peripheral vision while I organize dead people files because I’m tired of turning my head to look at nothing

Your email doesn’t find me I am wearing a headlamp in an abandoned detention center sorting files for the archives

Full moon dream: my house was raided, but the officers said my house smelled really nice so I wasn’t even mad

I like it (other than the days when the uncouth wind decides to nonconsensually touch my bones)

What the hell does this mean

Planning something out of my comfort zone if anyone would like to hyper-fixate on my potential future failure

I had a brief lump in my throat and my brain instantly said “you have hydrophobia from rabies”

The wind hurts

Ah yes, I see the curse is cursing

Making a Spotify playlist for my baby niece (preteen to teenage) My sister (works for HR) says she’s allowed to listen to anything So I’m making song no. 1 Brotha Lynch: ‘Rest in Piss’

It’s a good day