Charlotte Wilder
@TheWilderThings
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"Enthusiastic" @oddballhoops @gojoandgolic @lebatardshow my newsletter (pls subscribe :)
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Pinned Tweet
Knicks fans would do anything (give away their dogs, lie to their wives) for Jalen Brunson 🏀💙
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I tweeted about how Europe is handling the pandemic better than America and a bunch of people in my mentions are telling me to go live in Europe and I’m like...I can’t because Americans aren’t allowed in because of how badly we’re handling the pandemic
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Paul Rudd is on my flight to KC and I’m fighting the urge to stop by his seat and say, “Hey, look at us. Who would’ve thought?” just to see if he’ll say, “Not me!”
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Terrible things happen every day, but when someone like Kobe — who seemed so untouchable, so omnipresent and larger than life — is taken away it really drives home how absolutely nothing is guaranteed and our time here is pretty precious
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This is — and I can’t stress this enough — the greatest segment to come from a sports broadcast that I have ever seen in my entire life
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If Tom Brady plays another year because he didn’t get to own the announcement of his retirement I’ll respect him even more
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Oh okay so when Jason Kelce does it everyone loves it but when I do it it’s “time to go home”
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I found Paul Rudd in the Chiefs locker room and said “Hey! It’s me, the girl from the plane!” And he gives me a hug, glances around the room and says, “Hey, look at us. Who would’ve thought?” And I passed out
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Cigar smoke is POURING out of the Bengals locker room right now
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Someone left a rubber duck in the middle of the Ohio State logo
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The XFL is like the NFL if it put jorts on, slammed back some fireball shots, then lost its keys and had to sleep on a friends couch
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They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but Bill Belichick at Gronk’s beach party is at least 150k
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Figure skating commentators should be required by law to tell you whether the pair skating are dating, married, exes, siblings, or something else
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I asked my Vegas cab driver how he feels about the Knights and he goes "they're lonely." And I go, "the Golden Knights?" And he goes "Oh."
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What if — and hear me out — you didn’t frame a story about women’s deeply personal sexual harassment as a disappointment for fans because you don’t think it was bad enough to remove an owner who hasn’t delivered wins?
Sorry to disappoint Redskins fans. Even in the cancel culture that story, while horrific, isn’t going to take down Daniel Snyder.
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BILL BELICHICK IS AT GRONK’S BEACH PARTY I REPEAT BILL BELICHICK IS AT GRONK’S BEACH PARTY
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Okay I said hi to Paul Rudd and told him I was going to say "Look at us!" but that I *didn't* and he seemed to appreciate that. Also said if he wanted to talk about the Chiefs he could find me and he said "Okay, if I want to talk about the Chiefs I'll find you." Very nice guy!!
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“So that’s Zach Wilson, last year his ex-girlfriend started dating Zach’s former teammate and in a now-deleted Instagram comment, she wrote that Wilson was having adult relations with his mother’s best friend, so then Zach’s mom started posting these wild IG stories with her frie
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The size of Boban’s hand on Chris Paul’s head is absolutely sending me
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Can't wait for Russell Wilson and Ciara's Western-themed photoshoot in the mountains of Colorado
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If you’re a man and you don’t grow a mustache during quarantine you’re a coward
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Joe Buck: “Aaron Rodgers’ injury seems to be very severe and please remember to watch Toy Story Fun Day Football” I’m sorry I’ve never laughed harder
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Per usual, all it takes is one woman to fix a mistake made by a group of men
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Hey Pete can you please head into the kitchen and make me a sandwich? I’m too busy talking and writing about sports as my job so I don’t have time
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Both Sam Darnold and Zach Wilson look like the bad guy in a 90s kids sports movie so at least the Jets have a type
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“So Ciara, the third step, what happened? You just stopped at two?”
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Everyone’s talking about Caitlin vs Paige but I can’t wait for Jan vs Chris
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“A lot of NFL coaches thought the air raid offense was just a gimmick — and I know that began to change with guys like RGIII — but I personally think Mahomes and Andy Reid have probably done the most to make it respected in the league”
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You can’t compare sports returning in the US to sports returning in Europe because Europe actually cares about stopping the virus and the people controlling our government do not
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Neurologist: And did you laugh, when you saw MacGruber?
Patient: The whole time, doc
Doctor: No further questions
McDaniel said he and Tua sat together on the plane and watched MacGruber during the flight home, and that Tua laughed throughout the movie
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At his presser Andy Reid says he needs to go on a diet so he can fit into his clothes before Miami
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I know some people want UNC-Duke in the Final Four but I can’t think of anything better than a fifteen seed from New Jersey whose athletic department has an operating budget of less than $250,000 ending Coach K’s career to make it to a championship game
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Me, as I'm getting dumped:
Dave Gettleman: We'll see how crazy I am in three years
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Tim Tebow is proof that if you’re Tim Tebow and you follow your dreams you’ll end up as a tight end on an NFL team after spending a few years in the Mets farm system after failing as a quarterback for the Broncos after winning the Heisman
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Last night this guy in a banker vest started talking to me at the bar and told me he wished John McCain would run for president and I had to tell him that John MCain is dead and he got really upset
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The NBA developed rapid Covid tests and NBA players walked out of a game to try to get in touch with the attorney general of Wisconsin. Public health and social justice shouldn’t have to fall to athletes, but it’s amazing how they’ve stepped up when others haven’t
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I spent November going to college football games to figure out why attendance has fallen at FBS schools. I partied with dentists, got denied from frats, and realized that the answer is both very simple and extremely complicated:
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I should've asked him if he thinks he has better planking form than Vrabel. Start some trash talk. Maybe I'll try it when we land
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“SO HAVE YOU ALWAYS BEEN INTO SPORTS?”
World's loudest male bird bellows at females sitting right next to it
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That’s probably how he got mono
“I just think people are sleeping on Sam Darnold.”
@willbrinson
is picking the over for the Jets’ O/U 6.5 wins.
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Replace all the confederate statues with Business Horse, whom I found outside a courtyard Marriot in Louisville in 2017
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Everyone in the Phoenix crowd looks like they’re characters in Tony Hawk Pro Skater 3
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Just gonna go ahead and say that the reason we are in this mess — regarding sports or *gestures at everything* — is because there was and is no decent coordinated federal response
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Vaccine idiocy aside, hearing the phrase “public sphere” from a guy who thought the earth was flat really makes u think
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Thought that was Michigan State’s job
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There is no greater joy than when a dog rests its head on you
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Dennis Rodman in a leather jacket drinking a Miller Lite as he rides away on a motorcycle is what the inside of my brain looks like
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I'm Jewish, and the one thing I'll say is that anyone fighting for social justice should be fighting for everyone. You can't truly be against anti-Semitism without being against racism, and it goes both ways
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Just started crying thinking about the first time I can use a TouchTunes jukebox at a dive bar after this shit
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Sure sex is cool but have you ever chosen the exact right tupperware for every amount of leftovers after dinner
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The other day I was on the train while an influencer did a photoshoot as a mariachi band played behind her and I was like it’s too bad that if I tweet this people will accuse me of making it up. But then someone on IG sent me a post like...is this you? So now I can tweet it
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My soul left my body during the Ben Affleck Dunkin commercial and then Tom Brady showed up and I passed out and then Matt Damon showed up and I died
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Story of my life
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It’s honestly hilarious that the Patriots got fans to believe for two decades that a puritanical no-fun culture was the reason for the dynasty only for Brady to go Florida, wins another Lombardi with a former WWE star, and get publicly hammered. The greatest troll of all time
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Rudy Gobert is in Covid protocols so I guess everyone is about to get a dog and post pictures of their homemade bread next
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Wonder if Aaron Rodgers believes it’s snowing or if he’s done his own research and has decided it’s 75 and sunny
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@EdwerderRFA
Oh WOW you're right, Ed, sorry for attempting to make sports media more than 10% female, my bad
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If you're a man intending to use the "father of daughters" excuse to defend defending another man, save it. Congrats on having kids, it says absolutely nothing about your moral character
Antonio Brown's agent Drew Rosenhaus on sexual assault allegations "I myself am a father and I have two daughters, I wouldn't be doing this interview if I didn't believe Antonio, these allegations are false and he denies every one of them"
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Lmao this response always cracks me up because most men in leadership roles are only there because they’re men
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I don’t know who needs to hear this but Millennial isn’t the blanket word for young people anymore, lots of us have kids and shit the rest of us now get hungover after 2.5 IPAs
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This is moment of Tiger King isn't getting enough attention
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Zac Taylor’s looks like he’s the manager of a car rental place
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If we get through this I will never again turn down an invitation to a bar or a party for the rest of my life
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The Colts are not
*puts on sunglasses*
horsing around
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The inside of my brain when someone starts explaining the rules of a board game
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I would like to address the rumors and make it clear that this is not me, I wouldn’t be caught dead with a guy wearing a Hurley t-shirt in public. Thanks
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Me, a high-waisted Millennial, standing near a bunch of low-rise Gen Z girls in line at Sephora
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When you hit the last beer pong cup in front of the cute freshman
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Me to any woman my fiancé ever held hands with before
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Ladies, if he's:
-perfect
He's not your man. He's Gritty
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My bluetooth headphones when I try to connect them to my phone but they’re already connected to my computer
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It's a very strange time to have some personal news, but today was my last day at Sports Illustrated. I'm beyond grateful for my coworkers — past and present — who have become my best friends, and for the many stories I was lucky enough to tell
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They didn’t
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Aaron Rodgers follows Jordan Love on Instagram but he and Shailene Woodley do NOT follow each other in case anyone was wondering
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Me performing stand up for my parents at age seven after getting into my dress-up box
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Seems a little bold coming from a man scared of what eggplant will do to his body
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I hope Alex Morgan imitates a windmill after she scores while Megan Rapinoe pretends to pick a bunch of tulips
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Sharing this DM from a guy I know who reached out re: the WaPo story, because the issue is never “should I hire this woman knowing she’ll be harassed.” It’s “I must do what I can to remove the people doing the harrassing.” You can’t just accept maneuvering around bad behavior
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Just watched a woman kiss a man in a doorway, say, “okay, see you later...” and then as she walks away say, under her breath, “...maybe”
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Strange how the weekend doesn’t feel good anymore but Mondays still feel inherently bad
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