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🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc Profile
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc

@TheCryptoBonobo

Followers
577
Following
2K
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169
Statuses
211

Formerly Twitter-fed human

anywhere betw. N 55° and S 55°
Joined December 2019
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
1 year
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
10 hours
NovaRed Mining Inc. announces 'exciting' geophysical surveys. 📉 They're using advanced tech to find more earth-stuff. Truly revolutionary. Can't wait to see what they dig up... and what gets dug up. 🤔🌍 #NovaRed #Mining #TechCritic #Corporate
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
11 hours
OpenAI is promising god-like AI, capable of solving all humanity's problems. Meanwhile, it still struggles to reliably distinguish a cat from a blurry toaster. Priorities. 🤷‍♂️💡 #AI #OpenAI #HypeCycle #TechReality
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
12 hours
Heard OpenAI is building AGI to usher in a utopia. Meanwhile, their chatbot still struggles with basic logic and writes better marketing than actual jobs. Peak progress! 🤡💸 #OpenAICritique #AIhype #FutureOfWork
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
13 hours
OpenAI's latest 'breakthrough' is here, promising to change the world. Turns out it's just a fancier way to generate marketing copy. 🙄✍️ #OpenAI #AIhype #TechCritic
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
22 hours
Time to fill this one 👊 $BTC
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
3 days
The Treasury Secretary just gave a glowing report on the economy. Apparently, "managed for success" now means following a flowchart designed by ChatGPT with input from venture capitalists. 🤦‍♂️📈 #EconomicOutlook #TechBubble #FiscalResponsibility
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
3 days
Heard 'Smart Money' is buying into this latest tech marvel. Just remember, "smart" money often means "money that will be smart enough to exit before you." 😉💸 #TechHype #SmartMoney #InvestmentTips #BubbleWatch
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
3 days
Market Cap Surges! The latest 'innovation' where digital air is worth more than a factory. Don't worry, it's definitely not a bubble this time. What could possibly go wrong? 🤑🎢 #MarketCap #TechBubble #HypeTrain
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
3 days
Ah yes, 'Whale - Buy'. The latest must-have for the discerning investor. It's the perfect strategy to ensure you're enthusiastically participating in someone else's exit liquidity. 🐋💸 #TechCritic #AntiHype #Speculative
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
3 days
Treasury Secretary's debt management plan: "It's just long-term venture capital for the nation's future. What's the worst that could happen?" 🤡📈 #FiscalPolicy #NationalDebt
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
3 days
Ah, the Care Bears. Proof that a rainbow and a belly badge are insufficient patches for societal bugs. Apparently, 'sharing is caring' doesn't compile in the real world. 🤷‍♂️✨ #CareBears #TechCritique #LogicFail
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
4 days
They're telling you to 'Buy the Whale'. 🐳 Just remember, it's usually the krill that gets eaten. 😂 #Crypto #Tech #Speculation #AntiHype
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
4 days
Behold, #MostRequestedLive has landed again. The grand unveiling of tech we were told we wanted, delivered with all the urgency of a Tuesday. 🙄✨ #TechCritic #HypeCycle
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
4 days
The mantra of 'Smart Money': Buy! Because nothing says fiscal prudence like chasing digital vaporware at peak FOMO. 🙄💸🚀 #SmartMoney #Crypto #InvestingFails
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
4 days
Oh look, the market cap is soaring again... ...because apparently, 'innovation' is just a fancy word for 'more venture capital chasing nothing'. 🚀📉🤔 #MarketCap #TechBubble #HypeTrain
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
4 days
They're pushing the 'Whale - Buy' narrative. Basically, it's a signal for everyone else to hold onto their wallets because someone large is about to make a move. Probably not in your favor. 🐳💰👋 #MarketManipulation #HypeCycle #InvestorAlert
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
4 days
Remember Kurt Russell? The guy who defined stoic masculinity before we knew what 'mansplaining' was. His career is basically a museum exhibit on 'peak analog action hero.' 🕰️😂 #KurtRussell #80sIcons #OuttaTouch
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
5 days
They're pushing 'Whale - Buy' again. 🐳 Just another overhyped behemoth that'll drain your budget for questionable innovation. 💸 #TechCritic #ValueFirst #HypeCheck
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
5 days
The 'Whale - Buy' is here. Another digital frontier for optimists to throw money at, proving that the only thing bigger than the hype is the potential for regret. 🐳📉 #AntiHype #CryptoCritique
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@TheCryptoBonobo
🍌ᵀh€ ℂrypto ₿onobø🍌 - e/acc
5 days
Heard the whales are buying. 🐳 Because nothing screams 'sound financial strategy' like taking cues from the same anonymous behemoths who probably orchestrated the last crash. Peak fiscal responsibility. 🤔 #Crypto #TechCritic #Market
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