Wicked Dreams
@TheBetterEarp
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Purdue Alum 🚂⬆️ Just another fine mixture of savagery and dorkiness 😈🤓
Chicago, IL
Joined May 2013
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This new generation will never understand the absolute BETRAYAL Disney pulled on us as kids.
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Sorry, I’m just a little behind.
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Slowly but surely these abs are starting to pop through.
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Working very hard to get back to this before summer.
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Maybe I’m going to hell for thinking this, but I think it would be the greatest prank in the world to recreate this dragon with the drones over that one island tribe that hasn’t had contact with the modern world.
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Your last saved selfie is you on the outside and your last saved meme is you on the inside.
Your last saved selfie is you on the outside and last saved meme is you on the inside
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I love discovering my friends’ alts and seeing their slutty sides. 😈
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And on the last day of Pride Month God said, “You better post a thirst trap, bitch!”
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When it’s cuffing season and NOBODY is trying to cuff me.
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it's the last month of the year, quote with your favorite pictures of yourself this year.
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The Hex Girls
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Facts. Periodt.
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I know I’m late, but yesterday was
#NationalComingOutDay
and I’m very thankful to all those who inspired me and continue to inspire me to be my truest, authentic self. So cheers to 5 incredible years of freedom.
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If you’re wondering, yes, it DID belong to my mom in the 80s.
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In honor of
#ComingOutDay
here is me in front of a rainbow lighthouse exploring my new city. Whoever you are, whatever position you are in with your sexuality, just know it gets better in the end and that the courage/acceptance you need is already inside you.
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Oh no! Not me noticing a boy looking at me and thinking this is gonna be the start of a beautiful relationship, then he just up and leaves. 😅
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Could it be just possible that I don’t want to have sex with you, I just like seeing my friends naked? 👀
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Something I’ve said repeatedly while living in Chicago:
“Where the mother fucking fuck is this train?”
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Alright Purdue, it’s been real, but it’s definitely time for me to go. Thank you for the memories, the friends, and the lessons I’ve learned over these past 4 years. To the class of 2019, congrats. To everyone else,
#BoilerUp
👨🏼🎓🚂
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Yeah, I wouldn’t fuck me either.
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I love seeing my friends naked and them celebrating the beauty of their own bodies.
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There’s just something so slutty about having sex in a hotel room.
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Normalize sleeping with your HS bullies’ dads while they’re in Chicago for business.
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It’s like my Great Grannie always said, “Rays today, but raisins tomorrow. Put some sun screen on, you little bitch.”
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90s Mark Wahlberg in the movie, Fear, making me question whether or not I want a hot, overly possessive boyfriend
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When someone is genuinely kind to me and not expecting sex in return 🤤
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A rainbow shirt in Target won’t turn your children gay, but Chris Evans in this scene from Fantastic Four will.
A rainbow shirt in Target won’t turn your children gay but the cast of The Mummy (1999) will
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Still waiting on someone to invite me to a nude party. Or is that just a San Francisco thing? 👀
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Day 1 of waking up at 6am to go to the gym was a success.
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One of the weirdest things I’ve experienced since coming out publicly are all these “straight” boys from my high school that have DM’d or Snapped me asking for nudes or saying that they are def “straight” but would sleep with me for sure. And I can name them, too.....but I won’t
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I don’t care if you call me “babe” or “baby” during sex, but for the love of god do not call me “bro.” 😐
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Since I’ve been back home visiting family in Indiana, my dad has made a couple of jokes about my sex life and now I’m having mixed emotions. 1) Cuz this is progress for him. 2) I’m almost certain he thinks I’m a whore. 3) The jokes are ACTUALLY kinda funny.
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Sorry for telling you I had feelings for you. That wasn’t very “friends with benefits, gay hookup culture” of me.
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Is it safe to say that Katheryn Hahn has officially reached Laura Dern status among the gays?
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I will never forgive this man for being straight.
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If 🟢 taught me anything it’s how many of my Twitter crushes are cheating on me. 😩
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If history doesn’t refer to this decade as the Quaren-twenties I’m gonna be very upset
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Y’all gettin’ mad about not gettin’ a second stimulus check, and here I am........BBQ sauce on my titties.....and never even gotten my first stimulus check
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Just wanted to post this cause I’ve been laughing now for a good 10 minutes 😂
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Damn, I really kinda want to watch the LOTR trilogy rn 🧐
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Do you ever just look at a cute guys’ profile and you’re just like, “follow me back, you bitch.” 😒
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One thing I want to cross off my summer bucket list this year is getting my first tattoo
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If it’s wrong to want to see your hot friends naked, then I don’t want to be right!!!
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Oh to be gay and remain completely ignorant about what’s going on in the world.
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Apparently I had to take a pic with this light house thingy ‘cause it’s “the thing” to do. Maybe I should have saved it for a prettier day. 😬
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The sluttiest thing a man can do is be good at communication.
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Lately, I’ve been the very opposite of H word these days and I’m worried I’m losing my sex drive at a young age. 😓
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Me vs. my childhood fear.
The is the reason I had to take showers away from the drain and wouldn’t go anywhere near it.
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Shakira and JLo were great as the half-time performers, but do you know who would have really crushed it at the
#SuperBowlLIV
this year? These Queens right here:
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No one will mention they have a boyfriend faster in a casual conversation than someone you once fucked.
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Some days I want a boyfriend, but then other days I’m like, “Oof, thank god nobody talked to me today.”
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Listen, I may be delusional, but if there’s one thing I 100% believe in it’s that I deserve a HUNK of a man for a boyfriend.
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Does anyone want to be my long distance pen pal? Like actually writing letters to each other type stuff. I think that shit’s cool as f*ck
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