there's a plethora of questions to be asked about 𝐡𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐟𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐞. when did he become such an oddity? what do his incoherent ramblings mean? how did he get here? who is he really? and, why exactly do they call him '𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐜 𝐣𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐫'? we may never know.

⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀— COURTESY OF 𝑹𝑺𝑷. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀

🙂🙃

what's up chat, so today i'll be pouring pineapple juice into my eyes.

if the MODS WORK.

it's that time again.

ah, y'know... the wonders of the rats, clown antics, the shit you can do in the dark - all the fun stuff!

makes a damn change. most people who've approached me seem to dart off before i open my mouth. they're missing out on such wonders, i tell ya!

what, you fuckin' scared of me or somethin'?

full disclosure, i'm blaming you. you seem like the type to enable my dumbass decisions.

... well, fuck. that wasn't the aim at all!

mm? ... tell me my future, o' wise one.

https://t.co/ZcotjiNe2S

you might be onto something there... perhaps we did!

sick and going viral, wbk. ugh, we are so alike.

gag. 🙂‍↕️

please, if there is even a slither of a chance you may hear this... f i n d t h e a n t i d o t e !

your legacy strives forth, but your memory does not remain. i will correct the wrongdoings and clear the dirt path with my acid saliva — one we once walked hand in hand. my fingers only creak now. there is no warmth, no familiarity. perhaps... it was my fault.

somewhere in my mind, they still exist. everything went fine and we all lived happily. there was no torment, no martyrdom, no divide. only unity. and yet... i am left alone, riddled with disease. rust flaking from my bones and rot forming in my veins — forever may i continue.

nay. it is, in fact, the hootin' and hollerin'.

i have evolved to a higher level of tomfoolery. the sillies don't cut it anymore.