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Susannah Perkins Profile
Susannah Perkins

@SusannahPerkins

Followers
105
Following
22K
Media
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Statuses
3K

she/her. dc statehood is a civil rights issue. sometimes it feels like in my social interactions I set up hurdles that other people aren't willing to jump.

dc ward 5
Joined April 2012
Don't wanna be here? Send us removal request.
@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
6 years
can't wait to tongue kiss all my friends when social distancing ends it's gonna be great
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@ClickHole
ClickHole
1 year
There’s Always A Catch: This Walkable City With A Robust Public Transport Network Is Boston
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clickhole.com
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
2 years
my vet complimented me on my cat's weight loss and I'll be riding that high for weeks.
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
apologies to every member of every group chat i am in bc i do NOT understand dress codes and i AM making it everyone's problem
@maddiestern
madeline eva
3 years
im not autistic and this is wildly frustrating. dress codes are extremely subjective unless you use formally agreed upon definitions, like business casual. also, semi-related, don't tell me you're coming over at lunch time. when is lunch time???!?!?!?!
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
happy three year anniversary to this tweet
@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
6 years
Almost got backed over by a garbage truck bc I was spacing out listening to folklore. Everything is good here.
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
broski i hate hidden fees as much as the next guy but i think the seventy dollars on pizza may have been the bigger culprit here. also showing the whole world you tipped 2 bucks on 100 dollar bill is bold.
@PoPville
PoPville
3 years
"With all of these fees, my total for 2 pizzas and 1 salad came to $103.35."
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@amanduhgomez
Amanda Michelle Gomez
3 years
Summary of the workers’ demands:
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
can't believe I'm a few months out from 29
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@ISASaxonists
Axel Folio, PhD,🔻White Tears Distiller 🪁
3 years
@Phil_Lewis_
philip lewis
3 years
A British sailor says he was left marooned for several days after a pod of five orcas attacked his boat and tore off its rudders https://t.co/YQZ3rEvBqf
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@PanasonicDX4500
one dozen rats at a keyboard
3 years
“You can use the N95 mask you bought for the pandemic to filter out the wildfire smoke engulfing the entire Northeast” is a neat little sentence that lets you know we’re in the fun part of the century that future historians are going to talk about a lot.
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
solidcore: actually you can't cancel over email you'll have to fill out this form. me: (fills out form) solidcore, 30 hours later: actually you waited too long to cancel you're going to be charged for june :)
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
(pausing solidcore membership) me (via email): hey i'd like to pause my membership. solidcore (via email): actually memberships can only be paused once a year for 14 days. you'll have to cancel your existing membership and restart later. me: great i'd like to cancel
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
(pausing cut membership) me (via email) hey i'd like to pause my membership. cut (via email) sounds great you are paused!
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
putting my gym memberships on hold bc i have three weeks of work travel coming up has been an absolutely hilarious adventure in corporate bureaucracy.
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
the commune is mutually beneficial!! also the bee was the size of my thumb
@paulinaVEVO
Paulina Mangubat 🫏
3 years
Shout-out to @SusannahPerkins who, within a single week, saved me from a large bumblebee that invaded my kitchen, loaned me her car so I could get canine Xanax for my mentally ill daughter, and agreed to help me load a U-Haul with a vintage dresser set.
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
i refuse to connect to the wifi at dca bc it's called "flyreagan" and not "flynational"
@mouseabolition
barrel server @ ylfa’s bottleneck 🪓
3 years
@Juliannaaa_P DCA except I refuse to call it by its government name because bc then I’m saying my favorite is R*n*ld R**g*n
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@dropout
Dropout
3 years
Dropout's new password-sharing rule: you should share your password with a friend who can't afford Dropout, because it would be nice of you 🤗
@kendallbaker
Kendall Baker
3 years
Netflix's new password-sharing rule: Every 31 days your device must log in on your home network — or it will be blocked. https://t.co/tK2D4d5Wpo
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
happy winter solstice to the seasonal depression fam it is uphill from here the days are getting longer!
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@SusannahPerkins
Susannah Perkins
3 years
v thankful for my lovely sisters and cousins bc no one has disowned me typing "spreadsheets are so fun guys" in the thanksgiving planning chat
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@mouseabolition
barrel server @ ylfa’s bottleneck 🪓
3 years
Imagine you resurrect 3 murderous witches AND everyone keeps bringing up the fact that you’re a virgin all night like I know that white boy from Hocus Pocus was pissed
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