I did a blog! About the day we lost @kimberleystjohn. It's pretty candid and raw (and poorly written), but I found it therapeutic. I promise later instalments will be more uplifting... Part 1 of carrying Kim's torch forwards: https://t.co/KEBHgQgC0r #bemorekim

#swimforkim #bemorekim @jesaintjohn @SamWLock @lovell_natasha @scarlettnash84 @Lizzie_Lock_

UK nurses/student nurses - A wonderful opportunity to write bravely about something that will affect us all. Sometimes sooner than you might think. Wonderful team put this together. Kim's legacy rolls on 🌻💛

"You never know what's going to trigger the grief. It might be a song, a picture, a street intersection, the smell of a cup of coffee. It can be just about anything...and the wave comes crashing. But in between waves, there is life. " 4/4

"After a while, maybe weeks, maybe months, you'll find the waves are still 100 feet tall, but they come further apart. When they come, they still crash all over you and wipe you out. But in between, you can breathe, you can function." 3/

"In the beginning, the waves are 100 feet tall and crash over you without mercy. They come 10 seconds apart and don't even give you time to catch your breath. All you can do is hang on and float." 2/

One of the most beautiful passages about grief I've read, from an anonymous poster on Reddit, called GSnow. Read it countless times over the past 11 months. Sharing because it might help someone else out the same way it has me: https://t.co/zkzueP0yMx 1/

My family are the reason I survived that day.

Family WhatsApp, 11th July, 2020. Kim's stroke occurred 35 mins after her final message. She died less than 8 hours after mine. A surreal snapshot in time.

For some reason, the memories of those final minutes seem to be etched into everything I see at the moment. It feels like it happened yesterday. 3/3

Kim had what I think she would have described as a good death. She was peaceful, sleeping, surrounded by people who adore her. But it's not like it is in the movies. People don't seem to talk about how quickly the skin changes colour, or how quickly the hands grow cold. 2/3

(warning: candid) It's been one thing to try and stumble through a life without Kim in it. It's another thing to remember back to that hospital room and to have witnessed the exact moment that her heart stopped beating and that she ceased to be alive. 1/3

Turns out there WAS a whole lotta grief lying dormant through quiet lockdown. Feel like it's just starting to wake up along with the rest of the world. As present as day 1. Weird. 6 weeks til the year since Kim died. Reckon it's gonna be a bumpy ride.

A wonderful, reflective read about our @kimberleystjohn, and what "a good place to die" really means. Thank you @bisclaire ! 🌻

Received these in the post this weekend from @LifeDeathWhat @anna_eol_doula @poetic_endings! This book radiates warmth. Everybody should read it. For those wondering why I got 2, I didn't. One's for me; the other one's for Kim. Anna wanted to make sure she got her own 💛

Kim visited me in a dream last night to give me a cuddle. It's like she knew I needed it 💛

First wedding as a widower. Any tips?!

Talking about my grief, anger and loneliness nearly 6 months on from the sudden death of my wife, @kimberleystjohn. What it's like to be the one left behind. https://t.co/9ix74MlNGv #grief #loss #death #love

Today I will be mostly eating, drinking, and crying. Merry Christmas all 🎄🍻

I haven't heard it for some time, but it just appeared on my Spotify. For a brief unengaged moment, I thought to myself, "I wonder when Kim will be back"... Nope. She's not coming back this time, Sam.