Democrats are the Androids and Republicans are the iPhones for the youth. No amount of features can overcome cool.

If we’re okay upending all fed workers + related contractors, can we do the same with the healthcare insurance industry and just move to single payer now?.

Waymos are great to have driving around as you don’t feel bad about cutting them off.

Why does hot food taste better? Not like all foods, but food that's supposed to be warm, what about heat makes it good.

Plz open a Dave's Hot Chicken in sf soon!.

I’m so addicted to my phone/Twitter I’m surfing while peeing at the urinal.

What is this shit

The feelings pre, during, and post runs are so wildly different, all positively increasing with time.

facebook is just a verified craigslist.

RT @growing_daniel: I love basic bitch Indian food it’s so insanely good

Did people used to ask each other “do you know the time” or am I imagining that?.

Or lack there of.

doing this for the impressions.

Bowling shoes is big scam we just accept. Come on, how many of you actually make a moving start to your throw?.

Using the word “ironically” in a sentence is an immediate invitation for the listener to scrutinize your usage of it. Be prepared to defend your usage of the word.

Dogs are a better alarm system than a security system. They also don’t do have the false alarms while fumbling to remember your code problem.

after putting my dog on the keto diet last month, he's lost 10 pounds #success.

What is Carta trying to say here? All these people were already massively wealthy to begin with.

Anyone want a NFT of this bottle?

*Watching football game*.“Do or die on this play, we need this stop!”.*team gets first down, activating the “do” clause*.“Fuck. ”.*Two minutes later*.“Alright boys, this is do or die on this play”.