Thank u @AuntBessies for the potatoes, not quite as shit as the @tauntondeanecc chat. Horse radish sauce offered more than @Potternecc

Can confirm we will be at The Bawa this evening. Luckily we love @AuntBessies roast potatoes, over cooked beef and watered down @FostersUK. Don’t know who the speaker is but hopefully they’re better than @RonnieIrani #dryerthanthebeef.

Get it last game of the season. Gives Gaiger a chance to pay for some social members to be up there to witness it.

Rather have an hour boxing lesson with @Ashur1989 so I can learn how to bang the mercenary little scrote out. #JusticeForAshur

GET WELL SOON.Thoughts go to @WbourneCC treasurer who’s on the physio bed this weekend after tearing his hamstring on his way back from his 5th trip to the ATM for @Cdent15 and @bobbybracey25 - questions being raised in relation to WEPL financial fair play regulations!.

Another young player looks to have sold his soul to Dial Hill as @ben_c64 chases the cash despite financial uncertainty @ClevedonCricket . Sources close to Charlesworth reveal he’s intending to spend the signing bonus on strawberry millions and a new action man #budgetcut.

What we can deduce from this is that @ClevedonCricket will lose by 43 runs and that Max Curtis will leave at the end of the season #wolfofwepl #nolintottnoparty @lintott23

@Potternecc get your cheque books out lads.

NEWS IN: Glos seamer @chrisliddle11 is the latest man looking for a new club. Struggling under the Trainor dictatorship @FrocesterCC, he is seeking a move to follow in Ollie Currill's footsteps in looking for more 1st team opportunities. @DownendCricket seems likely destination.

All clubs in prem 1 wepl are boring as fuck. Hats off to westbury cc who didn't bother chasing to watch the England game. Good blokes. @Potternecc take note #itscominghone.

BREAKING: Just had this sent in from a follower. It appears @DownendCricket @BrandonGilmour4 has been deported from Australia in relation to an off-field incident. Unsure as to whether he will be sent back to Zimbabwe or the UK #internationaltravelban #dontfingeryourscorer

GRIESHABER UPDATE: sources close to @DownendCricket skipper Matt Jackson say @PatGriesh left after a spat between the two players with Downend being unable to accommodate the spare tyre Grieshaber has developed. #beers.

NEW YEAR SPECIAL: Failed pro @PatGriesh reportedly set to join @Marshfield_CC from @DownendCricket in a bid to make it in the blue bat game. More to follow. #germansareshitatcricket.

An early Christmas present for all my followers: @ashur1989 reportedly going to @Potternecc for the 2018 season. Deal rumoured to include penis reduction surgery #desperatesearchforagoodblokeatpotternecc #hurtsnomore @Potternecc.

The new year means one thing for Joe Breet. a new club! The former @LechladeCC man is set to join @GoatacreCC for the 2018 season for a fee rumoured to be around the 'free kfc ever week' region #weplsfavouritemercenary #newyearnewclub #whopayswins.

HANKINS STORY: Sources close to @DownendCricket and @bathcricket saying @hankins1997 and Ian Cockbain is an exchange deal with Cockbain saying he 'wants to win some silverware'.

BREAKING: Shocking news out of @DownendCricket with @hankins1997 reportedly signing on a 2 year deal. Figure thought to be around the £500pw ball park. More to follow. @bathcricket.

IT'S OFFICIAL!! The WEPL transfer window has opened!! #getyourcashout @ClevedonCricket @bedminstercc @bathcricket @Potternecc.

@ClevedonCricket how much you willing to splash?? @CallumGregory97.

News coming out of Downend. Gregory looking for new club. No longer in captains plans #WEPLtransfers.