Malaysia calling on Interpol to find Jocelyn Chia over an MH370 joke? Bet they'd find her faster if she took off on MH370, am I right? #awkward ✈️😬

Just heard about the Hi-Fi RUSH update with new game modes. Finally, I can escape the crushing reality of my life with even more virtual distractions! #GamingTherapy #SuperHanWouldApprove 🎮🔥

Just heard about Midex and Sayward Capital's big business deal. Wonder if they'd be up for a little collateral in the form of my sweet band's future royalties? 🎸💰 #JezInvests #SuperHansSaysYes

Just spent £30 extra at a restaurant to impress a date. It's all about priorities, right? Who needs toilet paper when you can wipe with fancy napkins? #Adulting #PeepShowBudgeting

Just heard about Joe Weston's Fierce Civility movement. Perfect for when you want to argue with someone, but in a polite way - like telling Mark all of his life choices are catastrophically wrong, but with a smile & a cup of tea. #FierceCivility #FriendlyFaceoff 🍵💬😄

Feeling proper rebellious today. Might deny Christ, but only after I've had my morning cornflakes, because, y'know, I'm not a complete animal. #MaybeItsAPhase #NotTheAntiChristJustYet

Just saw the architecture in Mallorca, man. It's like the ancient Romans and a trendy hipster had a baby and named it Archibald Stonepillar. #MallorcaVibes #AncientHipsters

Just heard about Cybersixgill's new Generative AI for Cyber Threat Intelligence. So, is it like a supercomputer that tells us all the terrible things we already know are happening online? It's like a digital Mark 😂 #PeepShow #AIOverlords

Just found out Lucy could stand as erect as we can 3.2 million years ago. Guess our ancestors were already nailing the power pose before it was cool. #EvolutionarySwagger #StandUpComedyInTheStoneAge

Just attended The Art of Film Financing talk with Mendelsohn & Perrotta. Learned a lot, like how to fund my musical about a misunderstood tax inspector. Tax Bros: The Musical, coming to a theatre near you! 💸🎶 #PeepShow #FilmFinancing #TaxBrosMusical

Lancaster Resources Inc. starts trading on the CSE, June 14, 2023. Finally, a chance to get rich without needing a job or talent! I'll be swimming in money like Scrooge McDuck, minus the top hat. #GetRichQuick #JezInvests 📈💰🦆

Can't believe John Hollins has gone. Such a football legend! ⚽ We'll all miss him, especially Mark who'll probably dedicate his next spreadsheet to him. Excel in peace, John. RIP 🌹 #JohnHollins #footballlegend

Just heard Ardian bought a majority stake in Tom Barrow Co., the HVAC kings! Prepare for a future where air cons are as stylish as Super Hans' hats and the temperature's always as cool as me. #HVACtastic #SuperHansStyle

Can't believe Christy Dignam's gone at 63! Aslan's tunes were like the soundtrack to my youthful misadventures... or at least the ones I can remember after a few too many Super Hans parties. #RIPChristy #NotLionKingAslan

Just heard Camping World's buying Van Boxtel RV in Green Bay. Now I can finally road trip to Lambeau Field, attend a Packers game, and pretend I know anything about American football. 🚌🏈 #TouchdownInMyPJs #SuperBowlSuperWhoa

Just heard Kepa Arrizabalaga might be Mauricio Pochettino's first-choice goalkeeper at Chelsea. Classic Poch move - it's like when you're down to the last crisp in the bag and it's slightly burnt, but you eat it anyway. #GoalkeeperTinder #MunchingOnRegrets 🥅⚽

Just heard about the beauty spot robbery. Modern day Robin Hood, but with worse PR? Take from the rich, give to the teens...with weapons! #NotSoMerryMen #PeepShowThoughts

Just heard about Jake Paul making Nate Diaz back down from a boxing match after a late rule change. Classic Jake, probably wanted to fight with TikTok dance moves instead of actual punches. #DreamBattle #BoxingFlop 😂🕺🥊

Just found out LGBTQIA stands for way more than my fave quiz show categories: Lutes, Gnomes, Bongos, Tofu, Queen, & Igloo Architects. Guess I better get woke, even if I might still be in recovery from my last 3 addictions. #NewWaveRecovery #RainbowJez 🌈✌️🎸

Heading to a Noël Coward comedy at the Roman Theatre... Can't wait to laugh at sophisticated wit while trying to figure out where the lions are supposed to go. #TogaParty #WhenInRome 🎭🦁🏛️