Owen
@OwenBunshaft
Followers
95
Following
99
Media
54
Statuses
763
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Pinned Tweet
Dreams do come true. Just got asked “Tha hell you lookin at like that?” By Mike Dimes aka Mike Deezy Aka Mike Deezus Aka No Miss Mike
#GOAT
#BitchIGoByMikeDimes
#Glazing
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This Years Valentine’s day stats:
-0 Valentines
-12 “Didn’t know she had a boyfriend”s
-4 Girls unfollowed on Instagram
-148 Sighs
-92 Eye rolls
-24 “Should’ve been Me”s
Next year I’ll show them!
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On plane to Italy. Dropped one singular piece of ravioli off my fork and it managed to hit and get sauce on
-my shirt(a lot)
-my phone
-my pants
-my headphones
Not the start we were looking for but at least now I know laundry with Matt Bobby Dillon is a lock.
#SpringBreak
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at what age am i supposed to unfollow eric kang on instagram? like im 20 looking at “who is the cutest sophomore boy” poll on instagram it just feels wrong and mildly illegal
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I’m the Michael Jordan of searching up old inactive groupchats and saying stuff that gets left on open in them when I have some free time
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Asked the live band to play one of my favorite unreleased Juice Wrld songs and they looked at me like I got 3 heads. Dublins kinda weird
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Man this Metro Future album couldn’t come at a better time. One of my favorite ex talking stages just told me she’s got a boyfriend and I have to “leave her alone”
#TYPESHIT
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ngl i couldn’t post any of my homies if they died
doesn’t fit my cool guy aesthetic i got going on for me on ig
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Kanye really replaced Quavo on Fuck Sumn with Alvin and The Chipmunks man what
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Note to future Owen: Do not, under any circumstances, eat a pound+ of chopped beef before you go to sleep at 3am ever again. Even if you add cheese and that special sauce you like. Especially if you do that actually. This is like a hangover but rather than alcohol it’s taco meat.
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don’t understand how you leave your house smelling as bad as some people smell unless you’re trying to hurt peoples noses like evil peter from family guy i could lowkey see doing that. also, he goes by “retep”
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Going to the gym at this hour unlocks a whole new cast I’ve never seen before
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professor just went 0/4 calling out names for attendance only to realize she has to the wrong class
#monday
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sometimes i delete my posts cuz im not the same person i was 20 minutes ago
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hung over as fuck. sick. football in 11 minutes
time to dial in and show out
been waiting 365 days for this revenge tour
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If you Were Born in the Years 2002-2006 and Jason Zell Doesn’t follow you On Instagram
You’re Nobody.
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sam goodmans twitter been hitting lately. young blood carrying my tl rn
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Been tryna get this one tweet out for 3 hours but the plane wifi is ass
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Some days you PR in front of a blonde chick wearing tiktok leggings, some days you get McDonalds before the gym because you haven’t had a shamrock shake yet this year and throw up in the gym bathroom, fake an injury, and go home. Today is certainly looking like the latter.
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Police Horse. How tf a horse gonna arrest someone??? They don’t even got thumbs (I think)!!
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Don’t matter what song is playing. Gonna turn it off and Play Super Bass.
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just killed a big ass cricket in the shower last thing dude saw before the pearly gates was deez pearly nuts
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@Zachm812ishim
Worst is when U gotta dream about a girl And ur dating In the dream then U wake up andUr not actually
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speaker knockerz would be 29 today. rest in power to an absolute legend bumping dap u up all night
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word on the street is charlie goodman’s aura is off the charts today
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just got a 0 on this physics quiz. an actual 0. my weekend has officially begun
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snapchat is wild. got a notification yesterday “check out a random day in your camera roll” i click on it and it’s literally just my dads funeral.
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redemption.
hung over as fuck. sick. football in 11 minutes
time to dial in and show out
been waiting 365 days for this revenge tour
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timmy is an average kid and no one understands… mom and dad and vicky always giving him commands
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just shredded that calc test. if i don’t get 100 on that it’s a loss
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L+Ratio+She Don’t Like You
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Nothing grinds my gears like noticing someone unfollowed me when they already follow thousands of people Like Im really not in your top 2,300 people
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@cgoodman35
somewhere out there there’s a person with “mordashaft” tatted
i think that’s pretty awesome
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Everytime I do something and think “that’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever done” I manage to outdo myself. When will this stop?
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That face you make when your awesome older brother (and mom and sister) cop you Drake tix for ya bday
#Draaaakkkeeee
#Sick
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“trust in gambino, he has never failed us, cuz i have got S plus what a dogs tail does” such a bar
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parked in a hybrid car/handicapped/teacher spot cuz i was running late to class call that a triple threat
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farmingdale wifi is so wack. how do they expect me to tweet during class ??
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Huge shoutout to my boys over at
@ChrisKay627
, thanks for the follow! I know the crew running that account are really a great group of hardworking guys, and by God does it show🙏🏻🙏🏻 Keep up the good work gentlemen!!!
#22Bust
#WhiteBoysThatHoop
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you guys are adorable
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“I have more time to be silly now that I’m unemployed. I’m a 9-5 silly guy now.” -Ricky Naughton (
@Rnaughton03
)
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Just hit double digit followers! Hard to believe it’s only been 6 years on this account, and we’re averaging nearly 2 followers a year!💪💪 Thanks to my family, friends, God, and all my followers for this amazing milestone, and here’s to another 11 followers!!
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That’s luv
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@JustTerrifying
My mom kicking me out of the car on the way home from middle school cuz I smacked my brother
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I have to hide my pills in chocolate pudding like I’m a dog except dogs aren’t supposed to eat chocolate. Also don’t think dogs can get strep throat, but don’t quote me on that
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Always Sunny in Philadelphia has to have the absolute funniest character development of any show ever
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had mad fun playing fortnite with my homie
@Zachm812ishim
just now
brodie carried me to 3 dubs
thats love fr 🤞❤️
mamba mentality
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Quit edging me and bust this album out already
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Eating a pound of beef and washing it down with Fairlife I feel like I’m Kyle Jusas
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ja really about to become one of the biggest “what if”s in recent sports cuz he’s dumb 🤦♂️
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can’t stop laughing thinking about when ricky luke shmeck and i played squads the other night and sky based all game then meckley goes “yo watch this” and jumps off to grapple back up but when he got back up he landed on us so he just fell off again and he tom and jerry screamed
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