oriel
@Orielol
Followers
117
Following
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Statuses
492
some yoomer
Miami
Joined September 2011
Getting assassinated is one of the top career moves these days
I am not suicidal and one of the happiest healthiest people you will meet. I have full faith in God and Jesus Christ is my Lord and Savior. As a sinner, I am only saved through His grace and mercy. With that said, if something happens to me, I ask you all to find out which
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I tried to type 'hitpiece' and autocorrect suggested 'hairpeice' I feel attacked
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Instead of pressing three buttons on the microwave for 3:30 I'll press +30sec seven times
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Using a ps5 controller one handed is a dark moment no matter who you are
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Ladies, a block-stacking mobile game has just informed me that I have an IQ of 540. Taking offers...
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The 700 marines they just deployed to LA are gonna come back as sailors
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Just taking a bite of a salad is the same as making a salad. You have to poke around and gather the ingredients before eating it. You make 50 salads every time you eat a salad, and some of them are good.
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Gonna do that anime smirking glasses-reflection move when the urologist asks me to take out my wiener
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If an immigrant can ball you up they should be able to stay in the country. Call it the ice bucket challenge.
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Me to comedy club bookers: I come with a 100 day free trial period and professional home installation plus a free memory foam pillow so you can KEEP SLEEPING ON ME
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"you should really watch this movie/show, it'll make you feel absolutely terrible"
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