Vapor Weyve
@Nymphomachy
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Intersex Chicana. ✡️《she/hers》 Writing about tropes, retrogaming, misotheism, queer fiction &c. @Nymphomachy @retro .pizza for evacuees.
New York, USA
Joined April 2017
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Last Seen Profiles
I was stunned to discover a few weeks ago that the reason that owls can't be trained like other raptors is because owls are actually really stupid. Of all birds of prey, they are the bimbos
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The reason why raccoons are good is because they know they COULD get the hot dogs faster if they just zerged him but they understand that making a good impression better ensures future handouts of hot dogs
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I like how JKR has gone so fullthroatedly transphobic that she no longer really has any public presence in the role of a children's book author anymore, she's 24/7 trans exterminationism, and people are still like "this is normal behavior from a safe human"
Like she's obsessed
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I genuinely hope DETECTIVE PIKACHU is the most financially successful movie ever made, and it creates a domino effect of writers and creators completely ceasing to give a fuck about whether something is a good idea or not
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"cops want to go home to their families" oh why? so they can beat the shit out of them too?
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I despise the "JK Rowling was rejected by twelve publishers before publishing Harry Potter" factoid because it's characterized as some kind of triumphant upending of the clueless literary establishment and not multiple professionals recognizing it was completely derivative work
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A comprehensive analysis on which Final Fantasy characters have fucked:
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woke up to a bunch of strangers on my shitpost going "in fact, an inability to be trained just proves they're SMARTER than other birds" and like first of all you're projecting but second of all okay I guess that must make earthworms freaking geniuses
and third of all I don't gaf
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It increasingly irks me to think about how white people grasped the idea of "security theatre" by TSA in airports long before they paused to wonder if literally any other type of security in their country or community was also entirely theatrical
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I know this will probably come off like an overgeneralized statement but it really feels like right now like the broken people are being relatively mellow about stuff and the functional neurotypical people are crawling up the fucking walls
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You guys remember back in like '08 when Meghan McCain was going to be the hip young peacemaker who encouraged the Republican Party to evolve on social issues
And now she always looks and acts like a church lady who owns a pillow that says "Stressed spelled backwards is desserts"
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Every time I see a tweet like "kids are going to learn about this in history class", I wonder where they live that public school curriculums aren't too chickenshit to teach a single day of American/World history after the Nuremberg Trials
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I made a meme in case anybody ever needs to use it to snark at someone
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Not to be pedantic but canaries in coal mines did not actually die; they just passed out. Miners would notice, take them back up, and the birds would wake up. Reportedly they fucking loved and spoiled these birds off-duty.
Not everyone in the past was a total bastard to animals.
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You ever think about how Mila Kunis, Natalie Portman and Ashton Kutcher have all made out onscreen, in any combination
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incredible a guy can be like "I am gonna buy a company and fire ¾ of the employees" and the people selling it can be like "that is fine, you are welcome to buy our company and do that," and 99% of all human beings see this, and do not, as an act of common sense, commit murder
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Things I pay attention to when I investigate a twitter account:
• Account creation date. The older, the better.
• Digits in username. The fewer, the better.
• Follow/Follower ratio. Can say a lot of things.
• Likes. Likes are often MUCH more informative than tweets.
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If you still need to know just how stupid transphobes are, please keep in mind that they are currently raging at a professional wrestling promotion for giving a trans woman of color the womens' championship because she has "innate biological advantages" over cis pro wrestlers
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What the fuck is being "overqualified" for a job
Like, what, are you afraid the fact that I worked for the government once half a decade ago means that if I help kill a monster the rest of the staff won't get any party XP
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I hope people realize that this plan to take UK kids off of puberty blockers is almost certainly a direct consequence of the sway that the likes of the fucking wizard billionaire has over politics
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"Professional appearance" as an aesthetic is inherently racist, classist and queerphobic
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The credits of every Japanese game prior to 1995 is like
Producer...
H. Sagawa
Director...
Johnny Hu
Designer...
Ken
Sound Producer...
Yuuchan
Art Director...
sprongfeld
Programmers...
Tu88
ghosts?
uǝʞ
<Speed Beaver>
Special Thanks
Bread!
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"We can't know for sure Chris Pratt is a homophobe just because of what church he goes to" seriously just get out of my face
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Reminder that if your twitter username ends in a lot of digits, you... shouldn't do that. That shit is the hallmark of hastily-made or bot accounts and it makes marginalized users like myself nervous.
Go to settings => account => username and come up with something yourself
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trying to turn a midnight shitpost with a punchline of "owls are bimbos lol" into DISCOURSE, is2g
the depravity of this website truly knows no bounds
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I don't know how to make cis people understand how it feels to watch people mock you for your appearance when you're an adult-transitioning trans woman, other than:
Imagine if people forcibly cut off your nose and then for the rest of your life mocked you for not having one
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Ever since Ellen Degeneres sanctimoniously defended her decision to attend a football game at a skybox with George Bush by saying to live by the maxim "be kind", it's become abundantly obvious to me that the philosophy of radical kindness is a right-wing pyramid scheme
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It's funny to think that basically the whole library of alexandria is going to burn because corporate interests got mad a website tried to do a nice thing to take people's minds off of all the dying they were doing
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The generation that let millions of children watch ACE VENTURA to the point of turning it into a fucking Saturday morning cartoon is now really scared it's "grooming" to tell children that trans people deserve respect and dignity
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A pet peeve of mine is this idea that taking a selfie or any other image without a filter or any post-production is somehow a more "authentic" presentation of the subject
A camera in its default state isn't some totally objective, neutral observer
It has its own biases
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Man honestly, I know it's been beaten into the ground but there's something so utterly evil about vehemently opposing the right of transgender youth to receive affirming healthcare and then attacking trans adults for not meeting your superficial standards of dress and appearance
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Amazing how extremely privileged people can look at one picture of an unpaved driveway and think they're staring into a Steinbeck novel about being left behind by the American Dream
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I don't know how to explain to liberals that if they don't want to live to see marginalized people subjected to mass extermination, they're eventually going to have to do the kinds of things to bigots that Superman and Yoda told them a hero would never lower themselves to doing
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Her complete fixation on railing against the crimes of this one marginalized group she doesn't belong to and has nothing to do with like
Imagine how demented I'd come off if I'd just spent all of the last three months on Twitter bitching about the Jino people of Yunnan
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I don't know how anybody can read the words "Dan Harmon Making First Blockchain Animated Series as Fox Embraces Crypto" and believe in any sort of habitable future
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yeah see this is why I always want to slap the people who told me "hey you'd have been a good educator, why didn't you ever consider becoming a teacher?"
it's because any trans women who interacts with children even remotely is eventually presumed to be a predator
Kids' magician sent disturbing threats and called a paedophile simply because she's trans
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Put "Tactics" at the end of any word and it sounds like an extremely playable sleeper hit
proof-of-concept:
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The fact that William Shatner is beloved of COVID truthers, anti-BLM activists and hardcore TERFs might actually tell you that he is, in fact, exactly the kind of bad person he wants you to think he isn't
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do people ever consider that trans girls are often "horny on main" because main is the only place in their lives in which there are meaningful concentrations of people who don't find them disgusting
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I think a lot about how the word "dinocracy" would literally mean "a system of government in which authority is derived from the most frightful and terrible"
But we don't use it because the word looks like it refers to a government in which authority is derived from dinosaurs
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How the fuck does the creator of CUTIES get attacked more for alleged pedophila than Shane Dawson gets for actual, repeated, endless pedophilia
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@Aaron4KS37
Look forward to seeing you become a full-on alt-right reactionary on Joe Rogan's podcast in a few weeks
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"How clueless these publishers were, to evaluate this total basic bitch's manuscript on its nonexistent creative and literary merits, rather than its potential as blank canvas upon which a marketing frenzy can be manufactured."
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This thing with the shofar and the pogrom reference has finally made me come around on "Robert Galbraith" being a reference to Robert Galbraith Heath. I can't think of anyone else who so frequently manages to "accidentally" say things that sound like declarations of war
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anyway this tweet left my target audience so yall go away now
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Honestly I don't talk enough about forms of transantagonistic aggression that are almost exclusively experienced by trans mascs, but the infantilizing harassment
@AnaMardoll
gets deluged with on a pretty regular basis to me seems like a textbook example of one of these forms
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If I tried to get a job at McDonald's, this is what would happen
I'd get in an interview and the manager would look at my resumé and say it was one of the most impressive resumés they'd seen
They'd be *incredibly* skeptical I wanted a job, calling me "overqualified" (cont'd)
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lmfao jesus fuck
Rowling released another garbage-ass Cormoran Strike book and it's about a transvestite serial killer
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PROTIP: a trans fem who dedicates a lot of her energies to persuading other trans fems that they were drowning in privilege up til the moment they came out of the closet and that the first thing they need to do now that they're out is "shut up and listen" is not helping actually
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bigot apologist: you probably love someone who is transphobic
me: if my own right hand thought trans women were men, I would feed it to feral pigs
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With Joss Whedon in the news again I suddenly realized I had forgotten that he is almost certainly a TERF based on some JKR tweets he liked but Whedon is such a fuckup in so many other ways that nobody's ever going to have time to actually get him on the record about that shit
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The idea that Rowling was some kind of plucky diamond in the rough who kept working hard and pulling herself up by the bootstraps until her literary genius was finally rewarded is directly contributing to the laundering of queerphobic ideology in mainstream spaces
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One of these days there needs to be a conversation about how nearly every single aspect of a child's existence is inherently carceral
JUST IN: Philadelphia City Council approves a permanent 10 p.m. curfew for anyone between 14 and 17 years old.
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FINAL FANTASY VII:
Cloud Strife is "reasonably sure" he has fucked but is gravely mistaken about this and has never fucked
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The thing that strikes me about the latest transmisogyny excitement is that she used the word "lynch", like even if I thought I were on the right side of history in foolishly using my platform to call for the public execution of a random celebrity, I would know not to say "lynch"
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Final Fantasy X-2:
As basically "transitioned Squall Leonhart" with all the comparative well-adjustment that implies, Paine gets pussy like a grieving widower gets casseroles.
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Also, since a lot of people don't know this, reminder that the reason we use "TERF" and not something like "terves" or "FARTs" is because TERF was a descriptor coined and adopted by TERFs themselves to launder their ideas, it's an example of the euphemism treadmill at work
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alt-right guy: people should embrace uncomfortable science
me: what, like that the sex binary is a social construct, therapy is largely a scam, weight loss is impossible for some and unsustainable for most and that IQ isn't real?
alt-right guy: what? no. I meant phrenology
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When TERFs attack an adult trans woman for how she looks, they are ridiculing and demeaning her for possessing physical characteristics that are a direct and intentional consequence of the ideology they promote.
They're laughing at the selfsame damage they knowingly inflicted.
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to be "disgruntled" literally means "to be deprived of your tiny pig"
As a word for a young pig, the word PIGLET only dates back to the mid 1800s. Before then, a young pig might be called a HOGLING (14thC), a PORKET (1550s), a HOG-BABE (1600s), or a GRUNTLING (1680s).
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if video games are work, then work is video games
therefore, labor is video games
therefore, labor can be gamesharked
I propose using a hex editor to end capitalism
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In my mind the Kurt Cobain trans question is less a matter of declaring him explicitly transfem as it is asserting him and his work (and grunge music in general) as musically significant to queer people in a particular way that people often only ascribe to David Bowie and Prince
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Blizzard is censoring gamers, but they're doing it for standing up for Hong Kong resisting hegemony instead of shouting the N-word so the G/a/m/e/r/G/a/t/e crowd doesn't give a fuck
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D.J. Trump was rejected by twelve decent governments before he finally got ELECTED TO PRESIDENT WOOOOOOOW
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Why the fuck do Fire Nation ships have such robust anti-air defenses when literally the only enemy combatant that has air power is the Avatar
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PSA: The narrative that "'𝐀ssigned 𝐒ex 𝐀t 𝐁irth' terminology originates with intersex people needing a term to identify themselves as victims of 𝐈ntersex 𝐆enital 𝐌utilation, and trans people culturally raided them and removed the term from its original context" is bullshit
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The reason I don't really think the situation with Buck Angel outing Lana Wachowski was ever litigated to satisfaction at any point during the Wynn controversy (or ever) is because nobody remembered the time a sports blog caused a trans woman's suicide over a golf club.
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I'm actually pretty fond of zoomers in the abstract but you have to admit that their unshakable confidence that in ten years they'll be much more functional and mature than we are now is, um, well all I can say is that I hope it works out for them
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saw a tweet like "if you give kids bodily autonomy then they'll just eat junk food and play video games all day" and like okay even if that were anything other than a straw man, it would be rooted in the idea that actually what they SHOULD be doing is becoming a cog in a machine
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if you do horse drugs, you will probably turn into a horse.
that is how drugs work. human drugs fix sick humans by turning them into a human, therefore resetting them to factory settings
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Don't even joke. Jecht has singlehandedly laid more pipe than the entire cast of FFVI combined.
If you interpret Kuja as having fucked a lot himself, Jecht is the ONLY one who eclipses him. Dude could fuck the whole Olympic Village and still have gas in the tank. MACHINE.
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Yeah so I think it's fair to say that recent American events have completely shattered 1991-era White Wolf's assertion that the CDC would ever have been competent enough a federal body to discover the existence of vampires
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I fucking love both Mara Wilson AND Emma Watson coming out against Rowling's shit opinions
Like when both Matilda AND Obvious Bootleg Matilda stand against you maybe just maybe that's a sign you're the fuckin Trunchbull
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Aerith Gainsborough has fucked eagerly and repeatedly and is exuberantly kinky to the point that none can surpass her power level
Also she would absolutely fuck for money if it could go to buying nicer accommodations for Leaf House and almost certainly has
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Gendered restrooms in a restaurant where one of the bathrooms is labeled "Søren Kierkegaard's Entire Bibliography" and the other bathroom is labeled "1276 Was a Year of Four Popes" and if you try to enter either restroom you trigger a spring-loaded cattle prod in the sternum
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I get so angry thinking that a few months ago people were messaging "we should prepare for schools not to resume operations for two years" and now we're just throwing children into plague because white conservatives have once again decided Ehhh, But We Don't Wanna
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Literally there is no way to "take a stand against Cancel Culture" that does not effectively mean taking a stand against #.MeToo et al
Being "anti-cancel culture" or "anti-woke" is just proactively communicating to marginalized/victimized people that you don't gaf about them
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Most liberals would call CPS the moment they even had an inkling a child was being abused but when a state is openly declaring its intent to murder marginalized children through targeted abuse and neglect that's not "enough" of a genocide, you have to go through "procedures"
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Kain Highwind is much too much of a sadboi to fuck. He's like "fuck? How could I possibly fuck, given the enormity of my guilt?"
Sometimes he just stares dolefully at his penis.
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Kefka owns a ton of really weird pornography all he does is sit casually on the couch laughing uproariously at it like it's a Calvin and Hobbes volume and it has never been explained and freaks everyone the fuck out and multiple people have firmly asked him to stop
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tl;dr: stand up for trans women who get attacked for their appearance, and do not under any circumstances harbor it in your spaces.
Understand that the kind of people who engage in this jeering are just about the most wretched, contemptible vermin the human race has to offer.
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Reminder that any form of "mandatory service" is going to be—as with the US military itself—inherently racist, queerphobic, Christocentric and ableist, and position very young people at risk for sexual abuse/predation.
Appalling doesn't even BEGIN to describe this proposal.
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FINAL FANTASY 1:
Garland has not fucked. He is such an incel that his blue balls literally broke the space-time continuum and awakened Hell.
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Brits, I know there's probably like good meat pies or some shit in your country but I'll be damned if your entire media profile doesn't make the whole island seem like hell on fucking earth
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Chris Pratt as Mario is such a goddamn pitch-perfect representation of Nintendo's relationship—both historical and current—with its queer fans
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I get that a lot of Millennials are older and maybe had more of a memory of life without the internet
But this idea that "cyberbullying is something only zoomers experienced" isn't really true
Source: I had a fucking LiveJournal and my classmates cyberbullied me for it
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Like it's this specious idea that any one of those previous twelve publishing houses could have made billions of dollars off of Harry Potter if they'd just been a little nicer to scrappy little Jo
As if the bulk of the genius of that first book wasn't some marketing exec's work
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I don't think you can fully comprehend how despicable this movement is until you've taken the time to understand this.
Until you've fully wrapped your head around the actual *sadism* at the core of gender critical ideology, the wanton violence embedded in its culture
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Irvine Kinneas. OH BOY. OH WOW. WHO CAN SAY IF THE SHOTGUN-WIELDING COWBOY WHO LOOKS LIKE IF BOTH ROMANTIC LEADS OF BROKEBACK MOUNTAIN SUCCESSFULLY PROCREATED HAS EVER FUCKED. come on now he's earlobes-deep in bussy, I think we can move on
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Zack has absolutely fucked and has probably specifically fucked a large percentage of SOLDIER though he also appreciates chicks
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"Testosterone poisoning" is a fraught, but powerful and effective metaphor
Most trans women I meet say they feel seriously and irreparably disfigured by testosterone
And that they feel like they were held down and forcibly subjected to that disfigurement against their will
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