Austin
@MrAustinParrish
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5,879
Following
798
Media
859
Statuses
8,887
Come for the shirtless selfies and dank memes, leave because of the rampant gay conservatism. Homocon, formerly @CloestLibertarian .
Minnesota, USA
Joined July 2016
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Pinned Tweet
Being gay was more fun when it was counterculture and subversive. Now I just want a husband, a white picket fence, and to be left alone by the
#AlphabetMafia
.
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When I was coming of age you could walk into a gay bar and it would be packed full of attractive men, now if you walk into a gay bar you're lucky if you can even find a man.
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Overhead at the gay bar: “We should shoot all the Log Cabin Republicans.”
Haha but somehow we’re the authoritarian “fascists”. 🤷🏼♂️
I’m just sitting here working.
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Because a happy and healthy 2-parent household is bad for…
…checks notes…
the conservative movement. 🤨
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Did you get your 4th of July workout in yet?
Happy Independence Day!
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@BillMelugin_
So we waisted 3 weeks and embarrassed ourselves to get rid of
@SpeakerMcCarthy
for what exactly… 🤣🤷🏼♂️
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Have you ever noticed that the loudest most in your face ‘don’t judge how I express myself’ gays are the first and meanest to judge guys who are just normal dudes that are gay? 🤔
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Big Gay’s continued attempts to erase
@fredkarger
and
@RichardGrenell
from history tells you everything you need to know about “the LGBT community”
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Hot tub and white claw after shoveling.
I feel better now.
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There is an insufficient number of homocons in this hot tub right now.
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My date this evening canceled so I’m posting thirst traps and drinking Taco Bell lemonade that I spiked.
because we’re working on healthy coping mechanisms.
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One advantage of the majority of gays being close minded democrats is that if I don’t find a guy attractive I can just mention that I work for Republicans and that usually scares them off. 😅
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@JLPtalk
1. Christianity tells us to love everyone no matter their ‘sins’, it’s not our place to judge them.
2. Conservatism is about self determination and personal responsibility.
3. So yes it is entirely possible to be gay, believe in Christ, and be for rugged individualism.
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Have The Gays™️ absolutely obliterated their dopamine receptors with porn and hook up culture to such a point that ‘I’m told this is fun’ and ‘it’s what all they gays do’ is their only gauge of what actually quantifies as enjoyment? 🤔
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“How are you still single?” is not the compliment you think it is.
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It’s not even that hot out this morning but man is it humid. 🏃🏻♂️
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I keep wearing this shirt to the gym but no one takes me up on it.
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- Matches with hot gay Republican.
- Chats with said hot gay Republican.
- Realizes we are 3 ½ hours apart.
- 😥😢😭
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Since everyone is posting their Christmas trees, here is my first tree at the new house.
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@Livefromreality
Nah, I’m still counterculture. Now being a gay man who wants a monogamous relationship with another gay man is counterculture to the mainstreamed LGBTQIAP2S+.
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I know people say you shouldn’t dress up to fly but I feel super dapper.
Plus I need the jacket with me and I didn’t want to use luggage space for it.
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I’m happy to have friends that don’t agree with me politically, but if you think I’m “not being my authentic self” because I’m not some raging leftist fem queen you should maybe reevaluate the meaning of authenticity.
This is me, take me or leave me.
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@GraduatedBen
Gaslighting is one thing, but blaming it on breakfast!!!
Now that’s where I draw the line.
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I’m pretty sure Grindr installed this mirror at my parents house, it’s so short I’ve never actually seen my face in it.
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If I were a lib I would post some long virtue signal about mass transit, but actually I’m just fiscally responsible and want to drink at this Christmas Party tonight.
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Pictured: Leftist gay vs Conservative Gay. 🔥
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Conservatives who assume all gays are leftists are just as bad if not worse than liberals who assume all gays are leftists. 💁🏼♂️
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After venturing out to a Minneapolis Gay Bar last night I think it’s time we just start treating liberal gays the same way they treat us. 💁🏼♂️
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When you paint lamb’s blood on your door and the angel of death still comes anyway.
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@SEIguy
I was called a “fascist f*ggot” way back in 2015 during college. I feel like such a trendsetter. 💁🏼♂️
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As requested, I can now properly pearl clutch with the best of them. 💁🏼♂️
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I almost fell off the treadmill trying to check a guy out at the gym. 😅
Clearly we should just not let me out in public.
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I’m sorry, but if you’re so f*cking gaslit to believe that in the year of our Lord 2023 anyone in the
#LGBTQIA
++XYZ alpha mafia is having their rights stripped away you deserve to live in the constant state of panic you’ve all worked yourselves into.
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I was informed that I had been posting an insufficient number of thirst traps recently, so 10 miles and 1:12:35 later here you boys are. 😘
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Because I know how much you boys love post run thirst traps.
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I find it vastly entertaining when guys tell me I’m some radical right wing extremist but then will still slide into my DM’s late at night. 🤔😂
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Is every gay posting their Christmas tree tonight? Here’s mine.
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@SydneyLWatson
I’m actually gay (a man who likes other masculine men) and I would still say yes. Too many of these cultural gays who just perform it for woke points and to get their piece of the “community”.
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You ever see a guy and think he’s kind of cute, but then you look at the blank stare on his face and realize there is absolutely nothing going on up there.
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Since gyms are still under
@GovTimWalz
’s draconian orders and the Lord blessed us with this beautiful warm(ish) December morning I’m outside enjoying 10 miles of fresh mask-free air.
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Work trips mean 10pm runs on the dreadmill in gym clothes that don’t match. 🙃
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Do guys actually hook up and not feel anything beyond getting off because this is a completely foreign concept to me and I think they’re lying? 🤔
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There are an additional 4000 guardsmen in the Twin Cities right now, maybe I should download Grindr and try to get one of them to wife me up. 😅
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When people ask me how I can be gay and a Republican:
Democrats do sh*t like this.
After taking an amendment to move language stating pedophilia is not a sexual orientation,
@mnhouseDFL
and
@SenateDFL
remove it in conference committee blowing the door wide open for actual pedophiles to use sexuality as a criminal defense.
Absolutely unconscionable!
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Why are so many people chasing boring meaningless sex?
Like you all do know it’s WAY better when it’s someone you actually have feelings for, right?
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It’s like The Gays™️ are actively trying to make me homophobic. 💁🏼♂️
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Straight people need to stop calling their husband/wife their “partner”, it throws off my already terrible gay-dar.
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“I’m a Republican but here are all the Democrats I vote for because I want to be a cool gay and have friends”
Queen, you’re not a Republican 💁🏼♂️
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The masculine urge to buy a chest freezer and half of a cow.
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When we get sent off to the gulag I expect all the Homocons to end up in the same camp. Otherwise I’m rioting.
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I know as gays were supposed to come out of the closet, but my new closet makes me so happy! 😊
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The summer body is almost back from winter hibernation. I do really need a haircut though.
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Group projects in school made me the conservative I am today.
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I lost followers after posting this and honestly that just makes me laugh harder. 🤣
As requested, I can now properly pearl clutch with the best of them. 💁🏼♂️
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@XM8Doublefeed
@reddit_TLCM
No, because they’ve become so self absorbed they’ve lost all ability to self reflect.
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Have to enjoy every outdoors run possible before winter returns.
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@lgbtqnation
This factually incorrect! If you hadn’t burnt all of your credibility already the last of it just went up in flames.
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If you send 20+ sequential messages to a guy you’ve talked to like once that start from “I think I love you” and end with “you’re going to die alone” you might be the problem. 😬🤣
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