How quick we forget Joe Biden once got an ice cream cone by himself smdh

Cheryl Reeve on the school shooting at the Annunciation Catholic School “It’s such an indictment of our society, our lack of regard for life. There are things that we can do about it, and we don’t, but for some reason as Americans we value something different. It’s sickening,

People are going to feel really silly when they realize the Cracker Barrel old man is on the Epstein list.

One of the greatest things about media today is you used to just pay some annoying price and get everything but now that price is still the same and you also need like 15 apps that may or may not be covered but either way make it super fucking annoying just to watch the shit.

Not personally a hater, but surprised Plain White T’s really slid so cleanly through that whole bad popular song discussion unscathed.

I don’t exactly want to call myself a bad boy, but I did today successfully and safely execute a U-turn where it was expressly prohibited.

Cannot wait to fuck Saturn on the rebound.

Not paying to fix the fuck up typo.

Lazy rainy Saturday, just sitting at home by myself Jack Antonoff.

Every single time a story like this comes up there is always one person trying to see genitals in the bathroom and it isn’t the trans person (or person assumed to be trans).

Learning new things being around the kids at the family gathering: Dude Perfect is Bluey Jackass.

If you did a forensic analysis on my work email it would suggest I have had 250 doctor or dentist visits in the past 6 months as I respond to emails I ignored or pushed off.

Are we ever going to admit that Tiny Desk is actually luxuriously sized?

Objectively funny the only clean energy production we are pursuing is on the fucking moon.

75 degrees in Boston on August 1st

Cosmopolitan Mag sex tip: You can simply pee in your partners vagina (where the pee comes from) and let her take care of it for the both of you later.

TED Talk: Something really important that has gone unaddressed for far too long, the format of 2 Truths and a Lie is far too restricting. The format needs 5 to allow for proper misdirection.

Me: I need a "personal massager" Hitachi: No problem, here's our Magic Wand. Anything else? Me: You wouldn't happen to know where I can get a 20-ton industrial crawler excavator would you? Hitachi: You're not gonna believe this

Dive bar toilets are just getting the reps in for pooping with an audience in prison.

Quarterback Deshaun Watson has been placed on the Predator Under Performing (PUP) list by the Cleveland Browns.