To whom it may concern,. Your wishes have been granted. I’m officially off the app. Thank you all for an incredible run. I’m starting my career today and have officially signed a multi-year deal with Employed FC — which means I won’t be tweeting anymore. Shoutout to the OGs.

I can speak for every single NBA player and team FC when I say: if any FC deserves a chiseled, motivated Luka Dončić for the next decade, it’s Lakers FC. We are the most reasonable, respectful, and humble FC in the entire league!.

Just woke up, and before I could even take my morning meds, I saw my glorious point guard Luka Dončić chiseled on the cover of Men’s Health. My goodness — he looks good. Mavs fans have gone from “he does this every summer” to shaking. Nico Harrison has created a monster. WOW.

Russell Westbrook is reportedly headed to the Kings… BIG miss by the Lakers on this one. We could really use a backup point guard, and bringing #0 back home could’ve been the perfect addition. This one’s a tough pill to swallow for Lakers FC.

In honor of football season being right around the corner, I’m officially declaring my loyalty to Jets FC. This is the year — the Jets will finally break their 15-year playoff drought, and Justin Fields will rise as a true franchise quarterback.

🙎🏻‍♂️.

hell no bot.

Can I join an emoji fc?

Sitting here after just taking my bedtime meds, getting ready for sleep, and suddenly a vision came to me: Jacob “Elite” LaRavia taking home Sixth Man of the Year.

I can assure you LeBron James will retire a Laker — not a Maverick. The Lakers are built to win now and have a stronger long-term foundation than Dallas. Oh, and let’s not forget… his son plays for them too!.

LeBron James has visited my profile! I just want to say — welcome, LeBron! Thank you so much for getting Bronny to the Lakers. It’s something you don’t get enough credit for. Just like Pelinka — he deserves more credit too, but that’s beside the point. Have you seen Rui this.

One Laker we’re all excited to see on the court next season is Gabe Vincent. He’s been working hard all summer and rocking a fresh look — no beard! Looking sharp, Gabe! Can’t wait for your 3rd season with LA! Time flies!.

Just saw my glorious LAKER—Luka Doncic hit a halfcourt shot with ease. He looks around 225 lbs—lean, strong, and fluid. Waist tighter, arms defined. Probably benching 225+, squatting 300. This is Luka 2.0. If he stays like this, the league’s in trouble. Expect an MVP season.

Just finished watching highlights of the Lakers’ newest addition, Chris Manon—and wow. He’s got all the intangibles to become a more athletic Georges Niang in the league. Rob Pelinka has uncovered another hidden gem for LA.

If the Lakers land Robert Williams, they’ll add to the best center group in the NBA. Ayton, Kleber, and Hayes are already elite. Add Rob’s size and explosiveness, and I’ll be getting fitted for another shiny ring with VVS diamonds this time next year.

To address the recent “drugs” allegations:. This morning, in collaboration with my physician, I voluntarily submitted to a comprehensive drug test. I believe transparency is key—and I have nothing to hide. The official results are now public below. — LB

Hearing Kevin Love might be open to LA if bought out by Utah. If so, we’d gladly take you with that last roster spot. The Lakers are built—the only thing left is veteran leadership and guidance. You’d be the final piece to the puzzle!.

Deandre Ayton will have a better 2025-26 NBA season than Anthony Davis. Bookmark this.

Jarred Vanderbilt couldn’t miss in his latest IG post—went 3/3 from the left corner and the jumper looks smooth. First healthy offseason in forever, and he’s unlocking his offensive game. This is the year he becomes the 3&D wing we all hoped for!.