Light, Peace, and Progress to the spirit of my Aunt Robin.
Yesterday was such a challenging, difficult yet gorgeous and joyous time.
My aunts, uncles, cousins, and I did the damn thing.
Everyone was absolutely beautiful and at the level.
One of my aunts retired from her corporate job so she could party for the rest of her life full time. Dead ass.
She’s in her 60’s and plans, produces, and goes to parties all year round. It’s such a joy to behold someone who is so deeply committed to celebration & delight.
I’m a Taurus.
I spend my time thinking about fabulous snacks, great vacations, and how to continue to be unbothered.
I give great advice, remember when ppl are being shady, and will not talk to you if I don’t feel like it.
I like silence in the morning. I’m the best friend.
we must be vigilant about practicing consent in all areas of our lives, not just with sex.
"can i hug you?"
"can i take your picture?"
i especially try to practice this w/ children.
i have a 3 y/o niece, who often doesn't want me to talk or touch her.
i don't mind.
Black folk: oh, no I don’t get down with connecting w/ the dead. That’s the devil.
Also Black folk: you know Nana is right here with us in spirit, looking down and so proud of you in this moment.
Me:
I’ve been sexually intimate w/ too many people who never experienced someone with a serious care ethic.
Yes, I’m gonna ask if you’re okay.
Yes, I’m gonna ask if you need water.
Yes, I can wait.
Yes, I’m looking for verbal and non verbal communication.
@heykelechi
Listen!!!! She holds such a dear place in my heart. But she be folding vocally. Consistently. For some reason, though, I find it endearing. And I’m super critical of vocals typically.
And her ass just be yelling.
When was the last time you wept & wailed?
How much space have you made to give sound to the grief, pain, and rage living in your body?
Where do you go when you go silent, when you retreat & dissociate from your own suffering??
Are you afraid to come undone, to release?
A 91 yr old Black woman from Montgomery, AL claims her friend Claudette was the first person to refuse to give up her seat on the bus. “The NAACP picked Rosa Parks to lead the movement because she was light skin & Claudette was dark.”
It’s foolish to think white supremacists don’t have spiritual practices that work & support them.
What do you think lynching was/is? That’s a spiritual rite of theirs.
How do you think they hold onto so much political, economic, & social power?
Come on, y’all.
One of my mentors told me about at one point in her life she had to go back to so many physical and geographical places/spaces to collect and care for herself.
Today, I went past my elementary school and the route I went to school to go and get younger me.
Whew! What a work.
Yes, you can be fearful, traumatized, depressed, anxiety filled and STILL manifest and bring about beauty, abundance, and transformation into your life.
Don’t listen to these bozos online who just started praying two days ago & now tryna tell you how all your shit is fucked up.
I’m convinced she’s a blessing to us from the ancestors. The fact that her name is Van Van was enough for me!
Bless and Protect this sweet baby!
May she always have success, open doors, fulfill her destiny, & not be bound to obstacles.
Listen to this:
- woke up heavy & grief stricken yesterday morning
- hand was itching (IYKYK)
- did floor wash and some deep cleaning yesterday.
- saw my grandmas special #
- woke up today w/ feeling so much lighter
- opened phone to see unexpected $ in the account.
Baby!
Please be gracious with your spiritual workers, mediums, and other folks helping you in these times. They are people. They are in this moment too. Life is happening for them too.
Two men are in conversation at work.
A dark skinned Black man says to his go worker, “man, I know Spanish.”
Non Black yt Latinx man says, “no, you don’t” and asks Black man, his co-worker, to speak Spanish.
Black man declines.
yt Latinx man proceeds to speak Spanish…
Tonight, while running errands, I meet a houseless woman at the crossroads who is visually impaired and houseless.
She has a piece of paper in her hand and is asking for direction. Everyone ignored her expect me.
I stop and engage her and ask her what she needs.
Chile, I just found out today my Dad done knocked out some nigga in the neighborhood for calling me a f*ggot.
Apparently, folks were commenting about how well done and beautifully written my aunts obituary was and they were inquiring about who did that work.
Y’all niggas be so unserious when it comes to your favs.
bell hooks, ibaye, was being clocked by Black trans femmes, hood bitches, and other folks for her investments in capitalism and cisheteropatriarchy.
She was late bootz in her analyses. It’s okay to admit that.
To this day, my Aunties and Uncles can out dance, our drink, and out party me.
I’m excited to continue on in these traditions and inviting more joy, pleasure, and fun into my life, and sharing it with others.
The other thing that’s gagging me is that right before I pulled up to her, I was singing, “Angel of Mine” by Monica.
This woman’s name was Angel.
And she told me I was her Angel.
Baby, this spiritual life is REAL!
I am not the sum of my traumas.
Trauma dismembers and disorients; leaving us shattered and insecure.
I am integrating the truth about the wholeness of who I am into my internal narrative and outward ways of being.
I am reclaiming, renewing, and remembering.
My family, as whole, are known to be party people. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been upstairs with the rest of the kids while they’re hosting whole celebrations.
We would do it all - fish fry, card games, birthdays, cabarets, block parties, crab feasts, fashions shows.
First of all, you're dehydrated.
Drink some water & keep drinking it til your urine runs clear.
Tea is great so continue that.
Yet it's the water, tho that's gonna do the work for ya in the ways you need at this time.
Add some lemon & a prayer for a lil razzle dazzle :)
my landlord tried to serve hella tenants with 5 day notices but i already got everybody a lawyer, they 14 day letters, and proof of every damage and code he breaking. 🙂🥶
:....somebody prayed for me. they had me on their mind. they took the time and prayed for me. i'm so glad they prayed. i'm so glad they prayed. i'm so glad they prayed for me..."
Black man responds quickly back in Dominican Spanish.
yt Latinx man, “yo, I thought you were Haitian all this time. That’s good tho cuz you’ll really hear what ppl say bout you” 🤡 🤡
Black man, “I’ve been hearing what ppl have been saying to and about me all my life.”
@Fiyasohollywood
It all be performative. If these celebrities folks actually had politics, they’d be divesting on multiple fronts and giving their dollars, presence, and power to those who need it the most. It’s all cap!
so many Black brilliant people live with emotional pain, social anxiety, depression, and other shit. so many of us have dreams and don’t know how to manifest them.
these are the people I truly desire to support.
I am one of those people.
people be like, "yo, God is amazing"
i'm like, "nah, you're succeeding at capitalism."
then i fall back and realize capitalism is their God. so lemme stfu.
noted.
In the US particularly, yt Latinx and Hispanic identifying ppl move thru space as if they hold authority on identity, personhood, and being. And what is that? A function of ytness that Latinidad upholds that always erased unambiguously Black folk and Indigenous ppl.
@troytheboyy
This is a question that’s good for Black & Indigenous ppl who are Latin Americans, many who don’t identify as Latino/e/x.
Latinidad is hegemonic project rooted in white supremacy.
Your thoughts are cogent & correct and totally make sense. It’s tracking.
I was talking to a friend yesterday and said,
“Many of the collective ancestors are saying to their children, ‘come to the edge, baby’ and many of us are like, ‘nah, I’m Gucci’ 😭😭”.
They’re telling us to do that because they want us to come to the edge and then jump.
Fam,
My father is in the ICU in a medically induced coma.
My ask is that you stand w/ me in solidarity thru prayer & lighting a candle for my father, Sultan Hakim Pitts, Sr. in service of his healing, strength, & protection from death.
Thank you VERY much.
When you shower and cleanse, you have an opportunity to release & let go. Start talking aloud w/ intention naming what you want to let go & release.
When you moisturize, do your hair & face, you have an opportunity to anoint yourself & invite into yourself what you need.
Do it.
I had to stop and write this. The Lyft app just let me know she got to her destination.
Maferefun San Lazaro & to all the spirits that made it possible for us to meet & for me to be a conduit.
I’ve been down bad in lots of ways and this moment lifted me up.
❤️❤️❤️
Across this country there’s nothing but shrines & altars to dead white ppl. ON STOLEN LAND.
Town, cities, streets, mountains, parks, communities, schools, institutions named after WHITE DEAD PPL who enjoyed seeing Black & Native ppl suffer.
Their names are high & lifted up.
Sometimes you don’t need to go to the cards. Sometimes you don’t need another divination.
At times, the message & answer you’re wanting and looking for is already there, already present.
The work, for now, is to figure out why the word you’re have already isn’t enough.
Ancestral veneration practices and rituals helps Black people deal with grief and death.
It’s such a crucial part of our culture and ways of being. We need it now more than ever. It helps us heal, mend, brings clarity, and allows us to move forward.
Black man is fluid in both languages, clocks what’s happening in real time and pivots the conversation.
yt Latinx man uses his nationality & Hispanic identity to try to tell a Black man who he is.
And I’m just listening and watching as all this unfolds.
i took a certain bill off of autopay and didn't realize it wasn't being paid for two months. My credit score dropped DRASTICALLY. i mean drastically.
i'm so gutted by this. all of this shit is sham and scam.
capitalism is trash.
drink your water.
take your tinctures
stretch and move the body
anoint your skin with oils and butters
get your vitamin d
name and know your fear
send breath and grace to wherever it hurts.
make space, make space, make space for you.
many people aren't aware of their abusive ways. so when you address harm, they will deny, gaslight, and deflect.
when this happens, i don't try to convince others of their ways. i recognize what's happening and move towards removing myself from said harm.
protect your energy.
Almost daily, I have to research the COVID infection numbers to remind myself we’re still in a global pandemic.
And it’s because the majority of people surrounding me don’t wear masks. It’s the most disorienting thing ever.
It’s a dystopian nightmare and I’m exhausted by it.
Shout out to the white supremacists who decided to follow me. Lmaaaao!
I bind you, your thoughts, secret actions, and deeds. They are returned to you 100 fold and to all of your kin.
I see you.
Of course, as I’m running errands this morning, I get into an Uber w/ a prophetess.
Y’all, this woman read me up, down, and all around town. I broke down and cried multiple times.
She was a whole medium and she spoke with such conviction, clarity, and precisions about me.
The woman doesn't have femme queens on her tour, she didn't acknowledge the beloved, O'Shea, ibaye, who transitioned while dancing to her music.
The bar been in hell.
She's a capitalist who exploited the cultural production of Black trans and queer ppl for her own gain.
A Black gay man was voguing to Renaissance at a gas station w/ loved ones and someone took his life because of it.
There is no safety in this world. There’s so much to unpack here.
The tears just continue to flow.
The spiritual technology that is Gospel Music is truly undefeated.
That sound, that conjuring, whhhhew!
It’s such a balm.
I never thought I would return and rely on it the ways I do now.
Life really is a ki!!!
Yes, we can and should stop for me and for you because I’m a human being, not a sex machine.
As my best friend,
@Jade_T_P
has always said, “our true ethics and politics always show up in the bedroom and during sexual intimacies.”
She said immediately, “God is gonna bless you for taking care of me. I love you and I’m gonna give you halos”.
We hugged tightly, I put her luggage in the car, and I waited until she pulled off.
She yelled, “I love you and I’m gonna see you again.”
I said, “I love you too”.
Some nut ass nigga said, “oh, that was Sultan’s f*ggot ass son who did that”.
And in that moment, my Dad did what needed to be done. 💀💀💀💀
I honestly love this for me. I truly do.
A lot of the thoughts that come to your mind repeatedly are your spirits & guides.
You don’t trust those thoughts because you don’t trust yourself.
You’re lack of trust in yourself isn’t your fault. You’ve been ungrounded & abused.
Your spirits love you & won’t let you go.
Earlier today, I was drinking wine and I got the lil nudge to give some to one of my spirits. I said to myself, "I'll do it in a few" then got to doing other things.
Later, I sat down to smoke a jay and drink a glass of wine.
How bout the whole thing spilled out!!!
baby, you're probably dehydrated & fatigued. get you some good rest.
maybe drink coconut water, even if you have to mix it w/ other stuff cuz you don't like the taste. also look for the flavored jawns. you need those electrolytes, less screen times, good food, and naps.
Thankfully, the Black man was well versed in knowing how to address & pivot the convo to something else.
Niggas always have to be quick on our feet, ready to address anti-Blackness.
It’s a lot.
May we have spaces where we can be at ease w/o ppl pressing or stressing us.
As we’re watching
#TheClarkSisters
, we must understand they’re COGIC.
And many COGIC folk come from Hoodoo/Conjure roots..
Look up Bishop C.H. Mason, a conjurer, preacher man, and founder of the denomination
In the music & rituals, those Kongo-Bantu traditions are THERE!
in my early 20's, in efforts to stabilize my life as a Black nigga from the hood, i inadvertently developed relationships w/ Black middle class, formally educated ppl w/ varying levels of social capital.
years later, i realize most of them hate me, my hood, and ppl like me.
And so ballroom and vogue gets violently consumed by the masses while Black trans and queer people, many who are in ballroom, can't pay their bills, are being attacked in the streets, and struggling to make their ends meet.
So sad but these are the times we're in.
Today, I lost my wallet while running errands. I almost lost my shit because I have protective juju/spirits in my wallet. I had no idea where it was either.
I prayed to those spirits and less than an hour later, a Black elder brought my wallet to my door.
Baby!!!!!
Tina Turner did and modeled tremendous healing, self preservation, transformational, and cultural work in her life & BEYOND the music.
While I'm grieved about her transition from this realm, I'm excited to think about the dynamic ancestor she'll be in this new phase of being.
We rebuke, bind, crush, and kill the overseer spirit that pushes us to work beyond our limits.
We uproot the ways we’ve been conditioned to disregard ourselves.
We call in the sacred ones to revive, restore, recover, and repair.
And so it is.
Yesterday, I found a whole heap of ancestors I didn't know, going back to 1835.
I'm crying as I type this.
My Carolina roots are STRONG as fuck.
Clearly, my people are like, "you gon' know who we are".
What an honor to be able to know & call their names.
The amount of police officers in nyc, philly, Miami, the Bay, and LA who are Orisa priests is astounding to me.
Isese and La Regla de Ocha.
It AINT safe.
I grew up poor/working class & was always laced w/ the flyest (designer) shit.
This is a custom & cultural tradition of so many niggas who grew up in the hood. I fucking love it.
It’s always telling when ppl look down or disparage us for it.
The things I witness in transit and travel be something else.
The subtle wielding of power thru words from non Black ppl toward Niggas. Smh
People also be telling on themselves in their behaviors, communication, and (dis)regard for others.
It’s a lot.
Naming these things doesn’t diminish who she was or the insurmountable contribution she made to the Black feminist (and other) canons.
Y’all won’t do that tho because you refuse to grow and divest from classism and elitism.
Bummy ass behavior.
A lot of y’all recent ancestors were churched people. They may have been many other things but that shouldn’t be dismissed.
Please take the time to do your healing work but don’t dismiss the tradition that held your people & made it possible for you to be here.
I see you. I know you’re at your tipping point.
I am praying that you’re provided with safe, comforting, and validating space for you to feel, reckon, and release your pain.
I am praying for your victory, your strength, and your relief.
🙏🏿🕯❤️
The other thing is that this was this niggas co-worker! They aren’t strangers.
It’s also the way this yt Latinx caste this man as Haitian in particular that also can be unpacked.
This man wasn’t just brown skinned, he was dark skinned with nappy hair. These things matter.
The next months & years are gonna be wild.
For your health, joy, & vitality, it’s imperative to get rooted in a community that loves you, holds you accountable, and provides you with the resources to live into the person you want to be.
We ain’t meant to do this alone.
The idea that everyone is supposed to be GUCCI right now is apart of the violence.
Ppl don’t have health insurance, jobs, housing, there’s war happening globally, and Black people are being killed over and over again.
It’s terrible and heinous.
It’s okay to cry and lament.
was talking to another spoonie today about the deep anxiety i feel during this "post pandemic" summer.
even w/ being vaccinated, having spiritual protection, and walking in wisdom, all of this is STILL very unnerving for me.
we just move on? Like TF?
Pray for me. What is prayer but an intentional conversation with the God of your understanding. I’m a person of prayer and believe in its power and might. I believe in miracles, signs, and wonders and they’re often enacted through a commitment to prayer.
Sending love to those who live alone and will be sheltering in place this holiday season in light of COVID-19 and these upticks w/ the omicron variant.
It ain’t easy. I pray that you’re comforted.
My life is a hood telenovela. Dead ass.
This also feels like confirmation that I need to go into business w/ end of life services.
I truly ate down w/ the things for my aunt and this is proof.
Maferefun Eggun. 💅🏿💅🏿💅🏿
Being truthful about violences, failures, and fuck ups of those who’ve died, especially those who are beloved, is incredibly important. It helps us and it also helps them on the other side.
We desperately need that type healing work.
When folks migrated north for work & other opportunities, they no longer had front yards in many sections of the city, specifically North Philly.
But Saturdays were the day you cleaned your front marble steps as a means of pride & spiritual protection.
Black folk, Black Christian folk in particular, laughing at Paula White as she prays and saying she has no power.
Oh, okay.
All the while completely MISSING what she’s doing, what she’s been doing.
But y’all continue to be arrogant and foolish, mmmkay?
Yesterday, I found out my cousin transitioned on Tuesday. He was a year younger than me.
We went to preschool together.
Just a few years ago, his father transitioned.
And during COVID, his grandmother transitioned.
It’s a LOT to hold. Too much even.
I love going on dates - romantic and platonic.
Let’s go out please
Hiking, happy hour, amusement park, beach, museum, walks to get water ice & pretzels, star gazing & meditation.
I be with the shits.
Gimme all the pleasure moments, fun, and tenderness.
You won’t sing the songs, acknowledge the rituals, or pray the prayers of your African American ancestors. But you’ll pray Spanish songs & prayers that your folk don’t know?
Our African American spirits can do so much for us when we offer them what they like, did, and know.
Folks don’t be wanting partnership, they want enmeshment, co-dependence, and the ability to control someone.
Your (potential) romantic partner doesn’t belong to you.
That shit is so celebrated on here and it’s sickening af.