Daniel Kalinaki
@Kalinaki
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Hack @NationMediaGrp , Author, Kizza Besigye & Uganda's Unfinished Revolution (). Ballboy at Views personal.
Joined June 2009
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WIN AT NATARAJA AWARDS
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Feliz Dia
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テンハッピーローズ
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Mães
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カーネーション
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MC NUNEW EP1
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Cibeles
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#やまラスト
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DONBELLE BOX OFFICE LEGACY
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Ohm X Nataraja Awards
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GENCelebrate Music With BINI
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Biggest lie we African elites tell ourselves is that we are independent. There is no political freedom without meaningful economic ownership and control.
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You see, Boris, there are many ways you can deal with a difficult Parliament...
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Clinton, Bush, Obama, Pence and now Biden on the same stage. Warm embraces, no name-calling, none of them jailed their predecessors. One day, Uganda, one day.
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If you wanna email me threats over my views please be brief and coherent. I don’t have time to tremble in my boots while also trying to figure out whether your stupidity is acquired, hired or congenital.
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Rita, Raymond come see me in my office on Monday morning. Bring your parents or guardians.
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On the run? He can’t have gone too far...
Buganda Road Court has issued a warrant of arrest for Pastor Mondo Mugisha who is on the run.
He is battling 53 counts related to obtaining money by false pretence and conspiracy to commit a felony. The accused allegedly conned pastors and private school directors over UGX 4bn.
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Uganda and Ugandans really could use some self-love and self-respect.
The culture of brown-nosing every carpetbagger and charlatan who rides into town claiming to be an investor arises out of a deep well of ignorance and insecurity. A few examples:
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First you give away tropical rainforests to cronies to grow sugarcane.
Then you borrow millions of dollars to plant forests.
I am losing my ability to can.
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Started off my day by refusing to give way to a ministerial convoy UG0111L. Attempts to drive me off the road failed. I feel so patriotic, someone pass me a medal!
#StayInYourLane
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As we drove home, with smoke still billowing and shots still ringing, my child told me she can tell the difference between a gunshot and a teargas shot.
Then she added: “I shouldn’t know this.”
Oh Uganda!
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Excellent weather in Kampala today for anyone not ordered by the President to stay indoors. 🤓
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Uganda could ask travellers for proof of Covid-19 vaccination instead of tests and raise its ridiculously low vaccination rate. But THEY won’t let public health stand in the way of private wealth.
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First, some breaking news: A recently-deceased man, only identified as Gerald, suddenly returned to earth to the great shock of the mourners at his burial.
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The President has praised the media, UPC, and condemned partisan application of the law! Quick, someone find out where they are holding the real
@KagutaMuseveni
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My biggest worry isn’t that Ugandans are broke. It is that Uganda might be broken.
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At this rate it is imperative that M7 shares some power with Umeme.
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The job ad wasn’t specific, simply said experience managing hoes...
A ex pimp is now running a multi-billion project as Ops manager. You expect her to lift farmers from poverty. Man, we joke too much in this country. Nothing is taken seriously. 🤦🏽♂️
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We can’t regulate Boda Bodas.
We can’t regulate boats.
We can’t regulate taxis.
We can’t regulate building codes.
We are always an accident waiting to happen.
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Last year I investigated Uganda’s response to COVID and found serious failures. Rather than fix them, the Health Ministry covered up and deflected. Today we are paying the price in human lives.
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DR Congo brokers peace between Uganda and Rwanda. When you live long you see many things!
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A country with a policy of exporting its youth unemployment problem has a problem with a young man seeking greener pastures abroad?
Julius Ssekitoleko is you and I, Ssekitoleko is the over 65% young people that are unemployed or under employed.
Ssekitoleko needs help and support not threats and arrest.
#StandWithSsekitoleko
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“Marinated in our secret sauce”
And these veggies are being taken to a market to be sold?
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Dear
@PoliceUg
I’ve just seen a march in Kampala to mark Israel’s 70th anniversary, with your officers guiding the traffic, your brass band playing. Why don’t you let the women march?
#WomenLivesMatter
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Mugabe is going to be rather upset about not being consulted about all these changes when he wakes up on Saturday afternoon.
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“Make noise, make noise!” he begged. Monsieur Bongo sat in what had once been a seat of power. Now it was just a chair. After years of silencing dissent and critics, Monsieur Bongo, flaccid, freckled and frightened, wanted noise.
Shut up!
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Kayihura was sanctioned for torture, corruption, facilitating narcos & poachers. His boss has only responded to the one thing he isn’t accused of/isn’t illegal — investing abroad — then deflected to the Opposition. Classic obscurantism.
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Ogon, we need to talk. 🤓
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Meanwhile, I think those religious leaders belong to SMAU; they didn’t give the birds transport.
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When al-shabaab overran a UPDF camp in Somalia in 2015 I wrote about it here. Were lessons learned? Forgotten?
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A High Court judge, in UG0786J, prolly coming from the annual judges’ conference, drives down the wrong side of the road. With judges like this who needs lawbreakers?
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We must, as a society, agree on certain minimum do’s and don’t’s whatever our political differences.
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M7 is such a delightful speaker on historical anthropology. It’s a pity he campaigns in poetry but governs in prose.
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Our clever plan to deal with corruption? A toll-free line.
Genius!
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Either Parliament approves money for a new wardrobe or it amends the law to extend presidential arm limits!
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Biggest lie we African elites tell ourselves is that we are independent. There is no political freedom without meaningful economic ownership and control. Happy ‘Independence’ Day 🇺🇬
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A young man is executed; you see no evil, hear no evil, don’t say sh*t. But 👏🏿the 👏🏿thought👏🏿of👏🏿a👏🏿zipper👏🏿opening 👏🏿and 👏🏿you 👏🏿start 👏🏿frothing 👏🏿at 👏🏿the 👏🏿mouth.
Who grew you?
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Why ask arriving travellers who already have -ve PCR tests to test again in a country with widespread community transmission and full hospitals? So you do what with them? Who owns these testing facilities?
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Maybe it’s because every time they won a corner they’d set up a shop?
Do football players of Indian descent play in the English Premier League? Are they 'allowed' to? I've never heard anyone scrambling to buy a Patel or Singh not even a Rajiv during those transfer periods. Educate me 😔
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Folks run to raise 1.5bn for a cancer machine bunker. Wankers spend 2bn on an anti-porn committee. Bonkers.
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No sir. It makes the U.S. look like the U.S. Amin was a despot but there are enough western despots, torturers and invaders to illustrate the point.
Appointing an actual pliers and tongs torturer to head up the CIA makes the U.S. look like Uganda under Idi Amin.
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Asked a GoU agency for info in March 2017. Got a response an hour ago. With a broken link.
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MUSHY THREAD ALERT: A Mwiri OB I hadn’t seen in >20 years looked me up when he was in town last month. We met as he headed back to airport (he, in fact, turned back, at the risk of missing his flight) and had only a few minutes together, in a mall parking lot.
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Hehe. Your OBs are retiring to play golf; you are here in Container Village looking for pesticides 🙄
.
@stanbicug
thanks for a wonderful evening last Friday. A fitting farewell for an accomplished man. More than anything else it was a fun time esp being able to keep
@Kalinaki
&
@Comrade_Otoa
in the background where they belong. Only later was it safe to bring them to the table🤣
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Bought these at
@ShopriteUganda
got home and discovered some eggs had probably hatched and crossed the aisle! Y’all didn’t come to play didya? 😂😂
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Mediocrity, sheltered from the biting cold reality by the warm blanket of cronyism, marinated in mendacious malevolence, stymying hope, lowering generational expectations. Welcome to oblivion.
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Fasten your seatbelt, ensure your tray table is folded and your seat is in the upright position.
If you know you know.
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We need to appoint a judicial commission of inquiry to find out why the inventor of the ‘rolex’ is yet to be awarded the Nalubaale Medal!
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I really hope no driver was harmed in the shooting of this movie!
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#UgandaCranes
needed calculators to work out the odds,
now we qualify with games to play. Birthdays were the worst days, now we drink champagne when we’re thirsty...
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You know a country’s planning is upside down when a bumper grain harvest sparks a crisis.
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Small small (hairy) protein snack and you go ratting to the coppers? It’s not like you put a forkful of mice pie in your mouse. Pussycats the lot o’yer!
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Govt is struggling to send money to vulnerable people because it has never had to give them ish.
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Nothing to fix. This failure is how the plan succeeds. For Nakasero and other private hospitals to thrive, Mulago had to die. Nairobi, Dec 1985. The Colonel. Musomese abaana.
@NativeLandgrab
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@rkabushenga
in the management meeting tomorrow after his boss gave him a public high-five tonight
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THREAD: Uganda's President M7 was today declared re-elected with 5.8m votes, less than the 5.9m he received in 2016, despite 3m new voters.
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Drive into Kampala and the roads are all named after colonial terrorists like Ternan, Colville, Mackinnon, et al. Local historical figures like Kabalega, Mwanga and others are absent or at the periphery.
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The plates in the chapel were for eating the body of Christ. 🤓
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An 18-year-old school dropout from the docks in Merseyside turns up at Entebbe Airport with just $50 and gets in, no questions asked. Ugandans headed in the opposite direction, even world-famous authors, must answer a million questions and sometimes even give sputum samples!
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Two Kenyan retailers, Nakumatt and Uchumi closed shop in Uganda. Why hasn’t GoU stepped in to help local retailers like Capital Shoppers expand and fill the gap instead of waiting for Shoprite?
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Outside, the ship struck an iceberg. Inside, the choir, hoarse, hungry but seemingly indefatigable, sang on.
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What a sad and beautiful photograph. Sun setting on hope.
End of Day 4 , mission to retrieve the boat by a crane mounted on MV Kalangala aborted , officials said the crane was weak to carry the load
#LakeVictoraBoatAccident
@observerug
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I wonder, how many criminals are currently at Kololo Airstrip? 😏🤓
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Dear Ugandans, enough of the lies, violence, skulduggery & insults. Let's all work for a peaceful & prosperous country that works for all
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You can accuse
@UgandaEc
of many things but it would be grossly unfair to accuse them of competence
#UgandaDecides
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I am thoroughly enjoying this zen moment and I hope it continues. If you can be one thing to the world today, be kind.
Now wipe the tears away, smile, and hug sambarry.
There.
That’s the end of my ted talk.
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Just discovered a way to turn ethanol from alcoholic beverages into urea for use as organic fertilizer. Need an appointment to ask for a square mile of land to invest in an industrial urinal.
No, I’m not taking the piss!
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Foreign capital, tech and ideas are important and must be welcomed, but an economy without meaningful local ownership and participation is inherently unstable and unsustainable.
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Ba ssebo neba nyabo leelo lwakubili nga munaana mu mweezi gwa mukulukusa bitungotungo mumwaka lukumi mu lwenda kumi na mwenda.
#BwobaOmanyiObaOmanyi
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They say gold, coffee and tourism are the main forex earners. Most of this value is in foreign hands and natives are mostly farmhands and tour guides.
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Took a long walk through my neighborhood. Counted half a dozen churches, not a single public space. Kids can pray but they won’t play?
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An imp drove into a parking space I was reverse-parking into, disembarked, grinned triumphantly and walked off. A younger me would’ve picked a fight but after seeing my friend lying in a box this morning I let it be. Don’t take life too seriously.
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To understand the underlying dynamics of Uganda’s healthcare system as seen from the eyes of a practitioner, I’d recommend The Patient, a book by the brilliant
@okobusingye
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Mathematics is to many journalists what the cross is to vampires.
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African dictators did not liberalise their broadcast spaces out of a love for free media. They did it out of a fear of coups.
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Meanwhile to the MTN chap who let the Cranes sponsorship deal go to Airtel, come with your parents to the CEO's office.
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This is how traditional healers start...
Folks, lately some of you have been asking me to mentor. I think we can do this here. I am happy to do a
#40DayMentor
during lockdown. U can start a TL on a subject u want my insights, I will answer each one. No politics, crime, love,diet or medical stuff. Just life. No insolence
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Police brutality towards pictures showing police brutality. Can’t make this stuff up!
Policeman vandalises Uganda Press Photograpers Award-winning pics. As in previous year, winners depicted police brutality.
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If M7 wants to know how to use oil money well he should go to Norway, not Equatorial Guinea.
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Of the 11 of us only
@CarolyneNaka
@piuskm
and I are still in the newsroom full time — and probably not for much longer. The loss of talent is an existential crisis. Our media houses are not only struggling to stay in business; they are struggling to stay in journalism!
The importance of Journalism in the society will matter today, tomorrow and in the future.
#mediaatthecrossroadsug
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My (un)popular
@DailyMonitor
op-ed today. Our education and socialisation have trained & conditioned us to moralise rather than analyse. It shows in the crafting of public policy, and our struggle to debate contrarian ideas with facts, logic and reason.
Teenagers are sexually active. Let us give them choices to do it more safely -
@Kalinaki
writes
#MonitorUpdates
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The neo-colony persists in the present-day political-economy, which serves primarily off-shore interests, and in which the local ruling elite are merely askaris and rural branch managers for foreign capital.
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The right to assembly, even of the raucous and drunken type found at music festivals, isn’t granted by a retirement-age busybody who walks around in an ill-fitting suit, hammer in hand, looking for nails.
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