Sharing tiktoks with someone you have a lot of broad interests with is so funny because you’ll get a video of the most beautiful shots of nature you’ll ever see and then the next video is Freddy Fazbear with a gun or sum

Long shot but if you or anyone you know living in the Smithfield NC area find her or have any info please dm me thanks guys💙

I am so tired of trying to make plans with people and getting crickets I know these mfs will ask me “why didn’t we do this??” 6 months later

If I haven’t tweeted in a long time it’s because I haven’t thought any thoughts since the last time

Nothing triggers my Neanderthal fight or flight instincts like sitting on a seat that shouldn’t be warm but is

Walking on a treadmill in the gym makes me feel like I’m God’s hamster having enrichment time in my enclosure

Surprise I’m streaming the new Resident Evil 4 https://t.co/hCqLKkXZQH

That’s a bigass dog

6 years ago vs now The only thing that’s changed is I look like more of a dickhead now lmaoooo

I was trying to remember the word cryptid and accidentally said capybara instead of chupacabra and now I need to see what a capybara cryptid would look like

Everyone talking about boyfriend air but nobody talks about Midwestern air I go back to my hometown for a couple days and all of a sudden I’m drinking Busch light and throwing bags

Sometimes you can just look at people and know they’re SO white a white at first sight if you will

When the Christian autumn girl asks me what I do on Sundays

A little geetar

Say what you want about other apps but there’s a special kind of unhinged you can only be on twitter

Liking Twilight isn’t a red flag but being Team Jacob is for SURE 🚩🚩

Need new rings and necklaces

If you follow these instructions it leads you to the Declaration of Independence

I ordered a book of chess openings the other day and was so stoked to get except I can’t READ the mf

I spent so much time last year depressed over my job it’s time to start living again