I’m hearing Dan Stevens has now apologised for his Boris Johnson joke on The One Show. Apparently, Dan had had a very busy day of work and wasn’t aware at the time that he was breaking BBC rules. He also didn’t realise he was on The One Show.
My 4 takes from today.
1. The Queen was one in a million and is irreplaceable.
2. The UK can still put on a show.
3. Leave the BBC alone.
4. Leave Meghan alone.
I think that all the fuss over
#HarryandMeghanNetflix
proves one thing: Harry and Meghan are more interesting than the rest of the royal family put together.
That must be incredibly hard to accept.
People who proudly refuse to wear masks in shops are basically saying that people who work in shops all day - and are therefore exposed to the public all day - are beneath them.
Imagine being that kind of person.
Fiona Bruce shutting down any discussion of Farage’s Breaking Point poster on the grounds that it is “ancient history.”
Talk about showing your hand.
#BBCQT
Strangely irritated by the BBC trailer for the new series of
#LineOfDuty
.
"From the makers of Bodyguard."
No.
Bodyguard was from the makers of Line Of Duty.
Tonight’s viewing: At 9pm on BBC1 you could watch
#Roadkill
, which is a fictional drama about a ruthless Tory MP who will stop at nothing to achieve his ambitions.
Or you could just wait for the news at 10pm and watch the real thing.
Laura Kuenssberg on BBC News just now on opposition to Johnson’s tax hike: “There’s been bellyaching.”
I think you mean there’s been legitimate questions raised, Laura.
Can someone explain to me why everyone was so amazed that a woman who sang one of the songs for the actual movie of The Greatest Showman could sing the same song on stage on
#BritainsGotTalent
?
Handy reminder.
1. The Government sets the cost of the
#tvlicence
, not the BBC.
2. You need a licence to watch or record TV programmes live on ANY channel (on a TV or device) OR access any BBC stuff on iPlayer.
3. You don't need one for Netflix.
4. It's licence, not license.
Your regular free reminder that it wasn't the BBC that got rid of the free TV licence for over-75s.
It was Boris Johnson's government - a government that you may have voted in.
The BBC is still providing a free TV licence for those most in need.
See you again in a few days.
Presenters, reporters, pundits and gobshites call Boris Johnson “Boris” and Keir Starmer “Sir Keir Starmer” for a reason.
It’s not accidental, and it’s not very subtle.
Questions for interviewers to ask Nigel Farage next time he mentions WTO.
1. How many new trade deals would the UK need?
2. How long do trade deals take to negotiate?
3. Who will negotiate them for us?
4. Who will pay them to negotiate for us?
5. Where is he emigrating to?
The first time I interviewed Paul O'Grady, his handlers said I had an hour.
He kept me on the phone for the whole afternoon talking politics and Strictly Come Dancing and everything in between.
Then he told me to call back if we'd missed anything.
An absolute one-off, he was.
Unlike certain other people, the BBC and Strictly never promised us everything would be normal only to then let us down badly. They just said they’d do their best. And they have.
This has been a brilliant series.
#StrictlyFinal
#StrictlyComeDancing
I'm very much enjoying Good Morning Britain's money expert Martin Lewis giving ministers his version of the "With me it's a full time job. Now behave yourself." speech from Get Carter.
Rufus Hound to Pip Schofield on whether his
#DancingOnIce
routine was crazy.
“Mate, we live in a world where the people we elect don’t want to feed hungry children. This (routine) is the least crazy thing.”
Going in blade first on the Tories on a light entertainment show.
“I grew up in Ireland watching your show.” Louis Walsh to Ricki Lake.
Ricki’s show started in 1993.
When Louis Walsh was 41 years old.
#XFactorCelebrity
This year's Children In Need broadcast should open with Tess Daly reading out the names and constituencies of every MP that voted against feeding starving kids.
This week's Gogglebox should just be Dan Wootton and Piers Morgan watching
#HarryandMeghanNetflix
together - with Harry sending them "U OK HUN?" texts every ten minutes.
Last Monday ITV’s This Morning ran a poll asking whether Jamie Carragher should resign from his high-profile, role model TV job. Looking forward to seeing what Holly Willoughby (same agent as Ant) and Phillip Schofield (same agent as Ant) have got lined up for us today.
Piers Morgan just berated Harry and Meghan for failing to recognise there are more important things in the world than them, while devoting the whole of his one hour show - on a fairly busy proper actual news day - to their Netflix documentary.
Last season, stories about Wrexham going for promotion back to the league were all over the mainstream news.
This season? Chesterfield are 13 pts clear with 2 games in hand and have won 17 home games in a row.
Silence.
What "I'm signing off for Twitter for the Christmas holidays" really means:
I'm only announcing I'm signing off for attention. I'll still be checking Twitter pretty much all day every day and by Boxing Day I'll be wishing I hadn't made the announcement because now I can't tweet.
@mrjamesob
“Did you actually watch it?”
“It was a disgrace. Kids shouldn’t have to see that.”
“Did you actually watch it?”
“There’s no excuse for it. It’s polluting innocent people’s minds.”
“Did you actually watch it?”
“I didn’t need to!”
Which song will Boris Johnson whistle as he walks back into No.10 after delivering his resignation speech?
I’m going for Carrie Doesn’t Live Here Anymore by Sir Cliff.
Many years ago, I had an interview booked with Peter Kay. He had to cancel last minute after catching the flu.
He proceeded to ring me at intervals for the rest of the day to update me on his condition.
“It’s Peter. I’ve just put some tomato soup on.”
Wish I’d recorded it.
Best of luck to the This Morning production team that is in charge of putting Monday's show together.
I have a feeling there won't be any phone-ins during the show.
All I’ll say is if Stacey Dooley MBE loses to two contestants who’ve danced before and one whose millions of You Tube fans will probably vote for him without even watching, then there is no justice in this world.
#strictlyfinal
#strictly
Remember it’s a “spotty” theme on
#childreninneed2017
tonight.
You have to try to “spot” the millionaire tax avoiders encouraging you to donate your money to pay for the things their absent taxes would’ve paid for.
Might bring the Christmas Day family row forward a bit this year.
Revised timetable.
1pm: Lunch.
3pm: Queen’s Speech.
3.10pm: Pudding.
3.15pm: Grandmas and Grandads explain to the kids why they voted for Brexit.
3.20pm: Family row.
Carriages at 4pm.
Watching
#GenerationGame
with my wife. I just said “Give us a twirl” and she launched into a ten minute rant about sexism on TV in the 1970s and 1980s.
I only wanted her to pass me an Easter Egg, FFS.
Did people really complain this morning that Kate Garraway had ruined the ending of
#WhiteHouseFarm
?
At the beginning of each episode it literally says it's based on a true story, FFS.
Better not watch Titanic, guys.
This Kate Garraway documentary is a hell of a watch. If there’s any justice Derek will be back home soon, stepping on stray bits of Lego. I hope he gets there.
#FindingDerek
I’m A Celebrity...Get Me Out Of Here! moves to UK for 2020
Hosted by Ant and Dec, the show will be broadcast live every night from a ruined castle in the countryside. More -
Ratings. Only 4.4m for the first
#XFactor
live show last night - down almost 1m on last year.
To be fair, there were some mitigating circumstances.
The main one being it was shite.
“Dear Piers, Sorry for throwing you under that bus. Anyway, now that you’ve recharged your batteries will you please come back to Good Morning Britain? We REALLY need you. First week of September is good for us. Lots of love, ITV. PS. You can pick the team.”
On
#InternationalWomenDay
, a reminder that in Britain, women rule...
Monarch: female
Prime Minister: female
Home Secretary: female
Scotland 1st Minister: female
Head of London fire service: female
Head of Met Police: female
Week off, so obviously I cracked and watched the whole of
#KillingEve
.
Best thing I’ve watched in years. Phoebe Waller-Bridge should be writing the next Bond movie.
This show should totally beat
#Bodyguard
in every awards category going. Probably won’t.