Why is Danny Rose dressed like he’s about to deliver bad news to Darth Vader?

I literally love Martin Zubimendi. He’s pure class and makes everything look effortless. What a signing.

Everyone was losing their shit because we looked a bit disjointed whilst playing mish mash squads full of new signings, kids and reserves. We put our strongest team out and immediately looked outstanding. Stop panicking over pre-season. We’re going to smash Man Utd regardless.

We signed a new striker and Kai Havertz decided to turn into Kylian Mbappe. Interesting.

I think people are doing Gyokeres a disservice by saying his diving header “hit the post.” Looking at the replay closely, I actually think the keeper got a finger on it and touched it onto the post. Denied by a top save.

Gyokeres is going to cause havoc in the Premier League and Zubimendi is going to change our lives. Both unreal.

All these so-called ‘tacticos’ said Gyokeres can’t head, can’t link, can’t hold up, can’t play back to goal and won’t score outside of Portugal. A reminder to watch football through your eyes rather than through nerds with spreadsheets who’ve never kicked a ball in their life.

Our frontline is looking electric here. Brilliant hold up play by Gyokeres, a lovely ball from Odegaard, excellent work from Martinelli and a smart finish into an empty net by Saka. This is football.

DoNt SiGn GyOkErEs hIs HeAdInG iS sHiT gEt SeSkO iNsTeAd. Shut up you virgins.

I can’t believe I’m seeing people complain about losing a friendly when we’ve just spawned a 15-year-old Lionel Messi regen lol.

We all knew about him from the youth team, but a lot of players shine at youth level and fail to step up. Dowman has been our best player every single time he’s played. He’s played in front of packed crowds, including at the Emirates. He is ready to play in Premier League games.

Pre-season is to gain fitness and give new players a run out. Regardless of results, our friendlies have been a huge success. Why?. The emergence of Max Dowman. He’s effectively a £100m player added to our squad. His performances have been insane and his confidence is sky high.

Max Dowman’s footwork needs to be studied by scientists because it is not normal. Nobody can cope with the way he manipulates the ball in tight spaces.

Norgaaaaaaaard 🔥 . Brilliant direction on his header at the back post and the keeper can’t stop it. Brentford fans said how much of a threat he is from set pieces - and there it is.

Viktor Gyokeres’ first start for the club and I’m having to watch Nicolas Pepe smash it into the back of the net. This is hell on Earth.

Watch until 8 seconds in, I promise you won’t be disappointed.

Fabio Vieira is a perfect example of style of play being more important than talent. He’s really gifted, but takes too many risks with careless passes/crosses/long shots. He has no place in a patient, meticulous team like Arsenal unless we’re chasing a game with 5-10 mins to go.

The nicest shirt we’ve had in years.

Frustrating game. We weren’t very good. Started to look a bit better towards the end, but Spurs had parked the bus by that stage. Gyokeres’ first appearance was spent competing against a back seven who completely crowded him out of the game. Dowman looked bright yet again.

Spurs players timewasting in a pre-season friendly. I’ve officially seen it all now.

Every game Max Dowman enters immediately becomes Max Dowman’s game. You can see the effort from his teammates to get the ball to him at every opportunity, and you can see the opposition actively attempting to double up on him. He’s 15.