Godmakinganimals
@Godmakinanimals
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Ever wonder how animals were made? i have all the answers.
Joined November 2018
Angel: Sir I need your signature for this insect. See, it has these beautiful wings and just flutters by so I was going to call it a flutterby- God: Butterfly Angel: Have you been drinking God: HaVe yOU BeEnN DRinKinG
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*makes humans* God: This is gonna be great! Humans: *live* God: Well this is just the worst
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*making an earthworm* God: Let's start with a long tube Angel: [forms tube] God: Okay thats enough for today
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Angel: Can you explain echolocation one more time so I can program these dolphins correctly? God: They scream and then know where things are
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[on a rainy Wednesday evening] Angel: *pauses crossword* ... Whats the mammal version of a tortoise? God: [makes sloth]
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[makes mouse] "bigger" [makes rat] ".... bigger" [makes squirrel] "BIGGER" [makes beaver] "B I G G E R!!!" [capybara is made]
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[Making t-rex] God: How about .... tiny head, giant arms. Angel: 😬 God: You're right. Strike that, reverse it.
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God: Oy Kevin wtf is that its horrifying Angel: I'm calling it a water bear God: Angel: You hate it don't you
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[Making a seal] God: Here, put these potatoes in the pot Angel: *fumbles* God: Did you just drop those into Earth ocean Angel: God:
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Angel: WOW what's this God: The almighty wolf... It will evolve only stronger. *flash to present*
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[Making elephant] God on microphone: ... aaand lastly the NOSE Angels chanting:WHEEL, WHEEL, WHEEL WHEEL!!! God: spins wheel *rick tick tick tick... tick... tick..t-* [spinner lands on tentacle] All: TENTACLE NOSE!!!!!
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[Making zebras] Angel: Uh sir I forgot to take the barcode off of that horse we just released in Africa. God: Damn it, Harold. Eh, it's fine, just leave it.
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Angel: So, funny story, I dropped some large shears and seem to have sliced off a piece of heaven and it fell on a wolf and, well, the humans are attached now. God: A piece of heaven you say? So like me, but the opposite because it's on Earth Both together: ....DOG.
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[making cats] Angel: *makes first draft of cat* God: OH MY SELF it's so cute. I love it so mu- wait, is it... judging me? Angel: Maybe. God: Nice. Does it have, like, a weakness? Angel: Feathers. God: o0o0o0o0o0o0o..... Yes.
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[making a millipede] "damn we need to use all these legs by the end of the month or we'll have to throw them away" "we could just keep making spiders - they have 8 each, that's a lot" "pour me another brandy I think I've got an idea"
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Angel: "Sir we forgot to make animals for Australia😳... and all we have left in the personality section is aggressive and all we have left for bodily fluids is venom" God: "that's fine" Angel: "you wan- .... you want them all to be-" God: "Aggressive and venomous, yes"
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Angel: "What do you want me to do with all of these leftover parts? They're almost expired" God: "Just.... combine them all idc" [platypus is made]
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[Making a llama] "Giraffe sheep" "What???" *laughing* a sheep that is also a giraffe.
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