It snowed last night... 8:00 am: I made a snowman. 8:10 - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snow woman. 8:15 - So, I made a snow woman. 8:17 - My feminist neighbor complained about the snow woman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snow women

I will give away 100,000 dollars tonight. Simply retweet and comment below.

6-1 win today against @HareAndHounds20 in the Ron pavey cup. Two Goals for @TimRivers92 and @LoganJohnson_6 then a goal for both @JackMunday5 and Sammy J! Big bounce back ability shown from the boys after last weeks loss. UTRR.

Eriksen is the closest thing united have had to carrick in a long time

The boys make it 6 from 6 for the season by defeating @AfcTelscombe 3-0 in the Div One Cup Quarter Final. Two goals for @TimRivers92 and a long range strike from @MarkBevan4 MOTM @Liam95Kelly

FT: An upset here as lower division Billingshurst run out winners over AFC Vardeanians goals from Bukleb (OG), Rendall, Bennett & Fowler - Rainford with the for the home side... special mention for Orris in the visitors goal who had a fine game! @AFCVarndean 1 @Billingshurstfc 4

😯 There was a cup upset in our Feature Game of the Sussex Senior Challenge Cup First Round last night... As @TheSCFL Division 1 side @Billingshurstfc won 4-1 against Premier Division opposition @AFCVarndean at the Withdean Stadium! ⬇️ #SussexFootball⚽️ #CountyCup🏆

The boys extend their unbeaten start to the season by defeating hove Wednesdays 5-3 in the cup. Not at the races today but some fine finishing from @TimRivers92 x3, a rare Ross Barton goal (dubious) and a goal for MOTM @Gfowler16 sees the boys progress. 5 in 5 ✅ #UTRR

RIP @IshiiBoii 💔💔

We make it 3/3 in the league with a hard fought 3-2 victory against Stone Cross. Goals for @JackMunday5 (and an early bath) @benjenner92 and young super sub Luca scoring with his first touch! MOTM goes to @Hallman123 for another top notch performance #gorillaglue UTRR.

The boys start the season strongly with a 8-1 victory. Unbelievable effort from everyone, Solid defensive display, cracking pen save from @Hallman123 with 3 goals for @JackMunday5 and a goal for each @hoops93 @huntjoshuahunt @TimRivers92 new signing Beau. UTRR. Bosh.

Another win for the boys today as we beat @HareAndHounds20 2-1 in an end to end physical battle. Goals for @Gfowler16 and a winner for @_matthewkeating on his debut. But massive shout out to @LoganJohnson_6 who gets MOTM for bossing the midfield. UTRR.

Mazy run and strike from 25 yards from @BrendanNeathey gives us the lead again

Sundays opponents didnt want this smoke so we receive an early easter present of PROMOTION. 7 wins on the bounce 🤛 #UTRR

4-1 win for the boys against @CVFConeclub good luck in your cup final and for the rest of the season. Goals for @TimRivers92 ⚽️⚽️⚽️ @Gfowler16 ⚽️ (i know right) another great performance from club legend @Liam95Kelly #UTRR

Real Betis fans threw thousands of stuffed toys onto the pitch at half-time yesterday 🧸 It's an annual tradition to make sure disadvantaged children don't go without a gift at Christmas ❤️🎁

Eddie Nketiah's heatmap: #ARSLEI

"If you search ‘Depop hacked’ on Twitter, there are multiple reports every day." The world's biggest reselling app for teens is being targeted by hackers. @thedalstonyears went down the darknet wormhole and uncovered this scam:

22 years old. One of the first names on Ole Gunnar Solskjaer's teamsheet. Scott McTominay appreciation tweet.

And that's why boxing haemorrhaged viewers and interest for a generation! Pure fucking corruption! Fury was the only one boxing, schooled the lad who eventually got lucky with the "I'll just chuck arms like a windmill " method. Absolute sporting travesty!