General Boles
@GeneralBoles
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Norway
• 134115 Tweets
Pacers
• 131989 Tweets
中尾彬さん
• 116022 Tweets
声優さん
• 74990 Tweets
Ireland and Spain
• 48714 Tweets
古谷さん
• 44837 Tweets
妊娠中絶
• 26341 Tweets
安室さん
• 25057 Tweets
النرويج
• 24575 Tweets
声優交代
• 22427 Tweets
死刑求刑
• 21345 Tweets
Estado Palestino
• 20266 Tweets
ブートヒル
• 18033 Tweets
Noruega
• 16586 Tweets
袴田さん
• 15787 Tweets
RIDDLE
• 10356 Tweets
#FeelThePOP2ndWin
• 10148 Tweets
Pinned Tweet
After a number of legal challenges, the first refugee flight to Rwanda prepares to depart
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"what were you NOT meant to do?"
"SMASH CONSTITUTION"
"and what did you do"
"SMASHED CONSTITUTION"
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Mark Francois didn't lose his legs at the siege of Sevastopol just for Oliver Letwin to block a no-deal brexit
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'Right Jeremy, let's try again shall we? If you have 262 seats, and Theresa has 318 seats, who won the election?'
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Some exceptional Ed Miliband pics in the last 24 hours, great to see him back
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Sunday 4:01pm outside the big Sainsbury's
Thanks to the government's decision to tell larger shops they are forbidden from trading for as long as they would like on this particular day of the week, my dinner tonight will be more limited and more expensive than it need be.
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Journo - I feel so proud that Spotlight won an Oscar
Me - What was your last piece about
Journo - '27 Hamsters That Gave Us All The Feels'
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Jacob Rees-Mogg (pictured here without a computer on his desk) has just accused someone of Luddism
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When you're no longer the shortest serving Chancellor in living memory
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I'm going to make my predictions early -
Dec 12 - General Election
Dec 13 - Hung parliament with no Brexit majority
Dec 14 - Mike Bushell wins Strictly
Dec 15 - Military coup
Dec 16 - Democracy abolished
Dec 17 - Brexit by military decree
Dec 18 - War with Spain
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"Let's try again shall we. If Boris has 365 seats and you have 203 seats, who won the argument?"
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'did you cover up all the nudes for President Rouhani's visit?'
'yes Monsignor'
'are you sure?'
'pretty sure'
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Sometimes I wonder how seemingly intelligent people fall for telephone fraud scams then I see a tweet like this and it all makes sense
When I was Chancellor, I saw a preview of what Boris 2.0 would look like. He was contrite & honest about his mistakes. He’d learned from those mistakes how he could run No10 & the country better.
With a unified team behind him, he is the one to lead us to victory & prosperity 2/2
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Someone's scrubbing "PR adviser to the British Royal Family" off their LinkedIn page tonight
#PrinceAndrew
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When these folks sell their house this is the exterior shot they'll put on Rightmove
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Johnny Mercer - I will not be doing media requests
Mrs Mercer -
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Adrian Chiles can fit more pathos into a half-paragraph than most writers manage in an entire novel
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My son is a high-quality person, and I applaud his transparency, now turn it up to 100%
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"Lumpy bed and lack of innovative jams for breakfast, 3/10, would not stay here again"
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I think the govt should introduce No Deal Brexit Bonds for leave voters. If it all turns out ok the bonds pay interest & capital is returned. However, if it all goes tits up, the bond owners' capital is used to fill the hole in the public finances.
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Have you been involved in a coup that wasn't your fault?
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"I want the rent by month's end Dean or you and the congregation can find somewhere else to pray"
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Want to feel old?
This is what Shaun from This Is England looks like now.
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OMG this is so embarrassing for Chuka and the Lib Dems
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Scenes as Asda customer tries to escape without paying for his
#plasticbags
http://t.co/e47oKIasQG
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Coming soon to BBC4 - Röry
Röry Stewart investigates a mysterious disappearance from the House of Commons where the Honourable Member for Sheffield Hallam hasn't been seen for months.
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2016: The Movie
(now featuring 8 more seconds of dialogue)
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"well Boris, 4 straight losses, a really poor performance from Rees-Mogg and you've sidelined some key players, how much longer do you think you've got"
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I may have to take a few days to recover from Oliver Dowden trying to look mean in a photoshoot
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It's not got a title yet but you best believe I'm going to watch all 10 episodes back to back
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It would be churlish to point out Stella Creasy's achieved more in 7 years of being a backbencher than Corbyn did in over 3 decades.
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Still laughing about Labour's manifesto promising £30,000 to an 18 yr old Etonian but f*** all to an 18 yr old working in Sports Direct.
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Boris - The deal brings shame upon our nation's collective head, it demeans, disgraces & debases a once proud people & even if the sun were to rise in the west tomorrow there is no earthly way I would back it
Me - There's a leadership contest if you do
Boris - ON THE OTHER HAND
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Steve Baker looking like a substitute geography teacher who's going to have some explaining to do after the Swanage field trip.
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Telegraph - We're fine not knowing how many kids Boris has fathered
Also Telegraph - OMG RORY WHY WON'T YOU TELL US ABOUT YOUR SECRET JOB WORKING FOR THE SECRET SERVICE WHY KEEP IT SECRET RORY?
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Röry returns to BBC4 this autumn and this time, he's not alone
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Take my tie off? In the chamber? My dear, I don't even take it off in the shower.
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I've been leaked Corbyn's conditions to meet with the PM
(1) 5 mile Chuka exclusion zone
(2) Cabinet to give rendition of "Oh Jeremy Corbyn" as he enters the room
(3) Nobody mentions the words "Peoples Vote"
(4) Comfy chair for Seumas
(5) Unlimited falafel buffet
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Corbyn actually gave his seat to Harambe but you won't read that in the MSM
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"so you get off at Old Oak and walk to Euston, couldn't be easier"
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'so tis agreed, if Mistress Berger do renounce her heathen ways and pledge herself to the one true Lord, we can avoid much unpleasantness with ye deselection stool'
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What's the hardest drug the Tory leadership candidates have ever done -
Stewart - Opium
Gove - Coke
Boris - Coke
Hancock - Licked a toad
Javid - Sherbet Dip
McVey - Blastaway
Leadsom - Sherry
Gyimah - Hooch
Raab - Steroids
Hunt - Sake
Harper - Crack
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Gillian Keegan first day back at work, morning v evening
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This could've been our PM but you went with the little guy in too short trousers
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You just know he's confused Arlene Foster for a waitress and is complaining about his steak being underdone
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winning the argument v pretending you've won the argument
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Now all her policies have been ditched Liz is just left with her quick wit and sparkling oratory
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'are you staying for coffee David?'
'no I'm leaving'
'THAT'S IT LADS HE'S TRIGGERED ARTICLE 50'
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"Thank you Mr Speaker and may I say how delighted I am with your updated guidance on Commons attire" (h/t
@wallaceme
)
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Just so I've got this absolutely crystal clear, not a single one of you actually saw the fucking drone?
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Rishi is such an amateur, Boris would have appeared in full flight suit singing Danger Zone and making plane noises
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What in the name of actual loving f*** is going on at the Telegraph
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'our plan is to put food on the spoon and attempt to get the child to eat it'
'and if that doesn't work, what's your Plan B'
'exactly the same but with the aeroplane noise'
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"I admire your luck, Mr....."
"Stewart, Rory Stewart and I'd like to talk to you about prison reform"
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I think I speak on behalf of the entire country when I say GET ON THE INFLATABLE UNICORN DAVID
Good to get away for a few days. But somehow I keep getting reminded of the Brexit debate.
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Thank god, now I can realise my dream of owning an artisan tin mine staffed entirely with children
No business under 500 people will be subject to business regulation, says Treasury minister Chris Philp. What none at all?!
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Going to be totes awks in the Commons tomorrow now Jess knows I fancy her
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Erdoğan - 'Mr President, we have shot down a Russian jet and need help'
Obama - 'New phone, who dis?'
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Calling an election when we were 20 points ahead of Corbyn wasn't a mistake.
Running the shittest campaign ever was.
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Congratulations to 'guy with 11 followers and really strong opinions' on winning
#PersonOfTheYear
2016
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BBC4 are delighted to announce a one off special episode of Röry.
24 hours before polls close & Sir John Curtice is missing. Has he been kidnapped by rival broadcasters? Is he locked in a fridge? Only one man can find him in time for election night.
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'We're stuck with the boy Clegg until May but then he's out on a free transfer'
#DeadlineDay
http://t.co/kv1WRc6HHn
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I regret to announce that ITV's political editor has turned up at the Treasury wearing Adidas.....again
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I'd just like to take this opportunity to reiterate how much of a disgrace it is that Kylie only has a "legends" slot at
#Glastonbury
and not a full 2 hour Sat night headline set.
This would never have happened under a
@RoryStewartUK
premiership.
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Mrs Jolyon - this leftover turkey tastes a bit strange
Mr Jolyon - just eat it ok
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*** BREAKING NEWS ***
David Davis has sent his letter in. I've obtained the first page.
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Indefensible serial killing but Fred West put up some cracking extensions in his time.
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If I ever lose a World Cup final after scoring a hat-trick please don't let Rishi Sunak on the pitch to console me
#ArgFra
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