Garrett Watts
@Garrett_Watts
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Current bug/future ghost. Video maker. Never learned my times tables. Very good at eating breakfast burritos. Biz: GarrettWatts @28thAve .com
Los Angeles, CA
Joined March 2009
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Last night it was cold & windy & when I opened my door this cricket hopped in, so I set him up good for the night:
- lil’ pot of water
- pickle & Swiss cheese
- left airpod w/ Frank Ocean playing
This morning I let him go & he hopped away happily.
I miss him & hope he’s good
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Welp. That’s it. It’s official. My heart has melted.
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I went on a date last night and while attempting to eat a fried mozzarella stick I somehow bit my tongue so hard that my front teeth actually connected through my tongue and blood spilled out of my mouth 🤗
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I love
@youtube
& am grateful for their
efforts & platform, but...
*inhales*
WHOEVER’S RUNNING THE TRENDING
PAGE NEEDS TO WAKE UP & GET BEHIND MY BOY
@shanedawson
CAUSE
HE’S ELEVATING THE GAME &
INSPIRING MILLIONS DAILY!
To blatantly NOT support creators doing that is INSANE.
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If you’re seeing this at night or scare easily, maybe don’t finish reading this tweet:
but I’m editing a video rn about exploring an abandoned hospital built in the 1890’s and when I caught this in one of the video frames I legit felt sick & had to stop editing for the night.
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SHANE:
* Always gives new creators YT platforms
* Donates 30k to protect foster dogs
* Makes beloved 100mil+viewed YT series
* Buys YT creator 40k car to help him
* Raises bar for every creator on YT
* Uploads 1,719+ vids for a decade equaling 3,977,560,373 views for YT
YOUTUBE:
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I am cripplingly self-conscious & it’s something I battle every damn day. I know I’m not alone in this so as a big F*€k you! to that part of our brains, let’s all share a photo of ourselves that we love the way we look in & let’s keep that self-love energy moving into 2020! :.-)
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K I’ma say it: Santa’s reindeer are clout-chasing bullies.
One min they’re shaming Rudolph:
-laughing at him
-calling him names
-not letting him join in on games
UNTIL he’s Santa’s new superstar, THEN suddenly “OH how they love him” 😒
Get rekt u fake ass plain-nosed reindeer.
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Something sad happened today that inspired a thought that I’d love to share with anyone who cares to read this.
I mean no shade to any one person with my words but I’ve seen remarkable, generous people be needlessly lowkey bullied for this & I’d like to shed some light on it...
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Hello. My name is Garrett & welcome to my Twitter. Love u.
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When Voldemort hears that Umbridge took over as headmaster
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I want an emotional support bee. With a tiny vest. And a leash :.-)
🐝
/
/
🕺🏼
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Something really scary just happened :.(
I took a photo in my place and sent it to my mom and she said “Um...what’s that in the top right corner?”
I looked closer and when I saw it my heart hit my feet & I don’t know what to do and I’m freaking out 😰
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Even if you don’t believe in them, please consider for a moment that u might be haunted by a polite ghost.
NOT an obvious scary one who slams doors at night!
Just a selfless sweet one who quietly moves little hazardous items off the floor when ur not looking so u don’t trip
💕
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I’m physically graceless, dangerously clumsy and cannot catch an item or do a sport to save my life... but yet somehow when it comes to receiving Cheez-Its I turn into actual Spider-Man 😅
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I’m gay but I would marry Miss Honey from Matilda in a billisecond.
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🚨EMERGENCY GOOD VIBES TWEET!🚨
4 pics of Quokkas being VERY Quokkas :.-)
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This is my 1st time ever on the trending page & I am so stunned & grateful :.-)
With my videos all I’m tryin’ to do is represent that it’s fun to be curious & love the world and to see this warms my heart.
Thank y’all for watching & thank u
@YouTube
/
@YTCreators
so much 💕
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A little sweetie just wondered into my profile picture 😅 idk where he came from or what to do about it but he seems very chill & sweet & he can hang as long as he’d like! 🥰
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I know I’m cutting it close, but If I do not end up in a very serious committed long-term relationship with Jake Gyllenhaal before 2018 is out I’ll be furious.
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This sweet girl just asked for a photo in a coffee shop so I stood up & accidentally smashed my big stupid head on a glass light fixture so hard that I felt like throwing up & everyone stared at me & a girl behind me giggled at my psychological & physical pain.
Happy Monday! 🤗
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Might f**k around and leave all my useless self-conscious traits in the past and become an incredibly confident healthy person 🤗
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With just two words I fear I might have already blown my chances with Cody 🤦🏼♂️
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Photo taken almost 4 years ago today. Looks like we finally found em all :.-)
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My Uber driver was playin Disney music & we just screamed along in unison to every word of “Poor Unfortunate Souls”
We arrived, I thanked him, & he drove off into the night.
The only words we ever exchanged were “hello” & “thanks”
Thank you Mushir, I’ll never forget you :.)
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Today is the birthday of one of my favorite men on the planet Earth & in my life;
@AndrewSiwicki
! Go SPAM the boy with all the love he deserves!
Pro tip: he likes photos of small odd dogs.
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Go send stupid-big birthday love to one of the strongest, most generous big-hearted guys on the planet.
Shane has mentored me through hard times, helped me arrive at my dream reality & most importantly, shown me the value of true friendship.
Love u Shane & hbd 🔪 🎂 👽
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My siblings & I had a big crazy photo shoot this weekend for our moms birthday to give her updated pictures of us, and amongst the chaos the photographer pointed directly at me and said:
“Ok, now let’s get you with your wife & kids!”
and I said “ok”.
Hint: I’m the last photo
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I’m not usually the type to publicly call out a brand or institution on Twitter, but honestly
#Hogwarts
this is getting completely ridiculous. My letter is 19 years late. Please, please get this figured out because I literally don’t know what to do anymore.
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This is so sweet. This would be really cool. At my best, I’ve got a lot of love for being intrigued & curious in life & I feel like in the age of screens, kids need to see someone who has an actual, furious curiosity for life & show them how beautiful & empowering it can be :.)
GARRETT WAS BORN TO BE STEVE! THIS IS MY 2018 MISSION! MY OTHER JOBS ARE CANCELLED!
#garrettbluesclues
#garrettbluesclues
#garrettbluesclues
#garrettbluesclues
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@realDonaldTrump
Unreal. In a state’s & people’s time of need... THIS is what you think to say. Communities burning to the ground, American corpses & countless wildlife lost in flames, & this is what you offer. You truly are the most graceless, piece of shit president this country has ever seen.
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Happy bday
@Ryland_Adams
! Here’s us trying on
@kathygriffin
’s expensive coat while she wasn’t looking & u looking great/human in it seeing as you are not built like an actual mountain troll.
P.S. plz don’t kill us for this Kathy & sorry if the left arm is bigger now.
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If you’ve ever wanted to see me:
- Drive a car worth more than my life
- Get rejected by a hot guy in a park
- Not know how to hold a dog
- Try to control traffic with a wand
Then good news! You can see all these things & much more in
@JeffreeStar
’s new video!
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Oh yikes I just accidentally learned a lot about the childhood of some random ikea copywriter 🥺
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A tragic moment I just had with an unreasonably attractive security guard who approached me at Whole Foods. After 3min of what I thought was flirting:
Him: so bro...can I ask u something?
Me: (certain he’s about to ask me out)
Of course man. Anything.
Him: Ur Pewdiepie right?
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Happy birthday to my favorite clumsy girl and co-parent
@_morganadams_
you’re beautiful and cool and I love u 💕
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Happy 2-year anniversary of my third-wheeling to the cutest couple I know:
@shanedawson
&
@Ryland_Adams
💕
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I’m not big on raising my voice but um... *inhales* HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO MY FRIEND
@AndrewSiwicki
WHO I LOVE SO MUCH THAT I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO DO.
I took a secret ft screenshot last night at the exact moment his bday struck at 12:00am :.-)
Look at this Premium Birthday Boy™️
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Please take a moment to imagine Mary Poppins as an Avenger.
I genuinely think she could kick Thanos’ ass & I cannot stop thinking about this!
QUESTION: Who’s a Disney character that YOU think could successfully fight Thanos and why?!
Buzz? Scar? ELSA? TALK TO ME.
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Despite what your Twitter feed consists of, I’ve always felt like there’s infinitely more light & beauty in our world than there is cynicism & darkness.
I hope today you’re feeling love or giving as much of it as you can spare.
From the bottom of my heart, merry Christmas 💕
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Um... HELP.
I got an EMF “ghost meter” for my birthday & I just opened it up & tested it on the scariest item I own: an antique 1930’s teddy-bear that came from a dead woman’s house.
THIS HAPPENED. WHAT DO I DO.
TWITTER... HELP.
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I am excited & grateful everyday to call
@AndrewSiwicki
a friend :.) he’s endlessly thoughtful & his deadly-specific observations make me laugh so much. Happy bday to the guy who literally makes me a better person. Go spam him w/ love & pics of awkward animals. He loves those :.)
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I met a hairless cat today and it was arguably the best moment of my life :.)
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I think about these two sweeties every single damn day & I hope they’re doin’ good
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If I somehow died before I got to see Infinity War Part 2 my ghost ass would be haunting this planet till it came out. No doubt.
I wouldn’t care if Heaven or loved ones or whatever were waiting for me on the other side, I’d just be like “Na ima chill in this AMC for a sec”
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Maybe someone will feel me on this, but something that’s always confused me is seeing people put their astrology signs above others or lowkey shaming other people’s signs.
That stuff is supposed to be cosmic & cool, not like a competitive ego thing.
Just let it be sweet 💕✨🌚
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“She was fearless, and crazier than him. She was his queen, and God help anyone who disrespected his queen.”
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I’ve never turned on my phones flashlight without very quietly whispering “lumos” to myself.
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:.) Thank YOU! 💕
I’d be nowhere near 2mil without:
1. You. The most wholesome supportive fans on the planet 🌏
2. My rock-solid tribe of friends, namely, Shane who inspired & jumpstarted my channel at a crucial time in my life.
Ty, love u & I’ll never stop creating for u :.)
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Excuse me sir, this is an airport, not an actual cartoon. Also, WHAT IS THAT 😂 AND WHERE ON EARTH ARE U PLANNING ON PUTTING THAT DURING UR FLIGHT
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1. Love u, hope ur well & stay hydrated!
2. I did a lil’ thing with
@TeenVogue
that comes out tomorrow! 🙊🕺🏼🤷🏼♂️
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My veteran, hero-cop older brother (who has his masters degree) just called to tell me he bought a new house with his beautiful wife.
When he asked “what’s new with u?” I confidently informed him that “I bit my leftover thanksgiving turkey into the shape of a Yorkshire Terrier.”
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Looking at clouds is as free as it is fun :.-)
☁️ ☁️ ☁️ 🌞 ☁️ ☁️ ☁️
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What’s a movie that you know so well that you could watch it without sound and still *hear* it?
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We kissed ur mom & now we’re dating her srynotsry loser we’re ur dads now
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After half a year of replies I’m starting to get the idea that this is in fact NOT a battle bow for journeys & adventures 😑
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One of y’all made this on Instagram & I’m obsessed, THANK YOU 😂
HAPPY FRIDAY! 💕
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animal crackers in my soup
👋
\ 😫
|| \_
_/¯ ¯\_
MONKEYS & RABBITS LOOP DA LOOP
😭
👊/||\_
_/¯ ¯\_
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Dear past Garrett,
A “dashboard succulent” is not a cute or good idea. Please do not do this.
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911 what’s your emergency?
*in kooky voice*
HEY! Is being too RaNdOm an emergency?!
*sigh*
Good morning Garrett.
Ha, morning Sarah!
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*rubs magic lamp*
Ah! You’ve awoken me from my slumber! I grant thee three wis-
Find me a good Vine compilation with no repeats from other Vine compilations.
Very well! You have two more wi-
I’ll just take two more of those, thanks.
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Dude I’m dead... 😂 please look at how skilled my idiot brother Randy is at photo-bombing. Can you even spot him?
Hint: he’s NOT the guy in blue.
My friend and I saw Garrett Watts at a store today and I'm still dead
@Garrett_Watts
thank you for being so nice!!!!
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It rained in LA today just like it did when they broke the curse at the end of “Holes” (2003) 😂
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Ur a wiz ard arry
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..... (¯`v´¯)♥
\ A.S. /
..... `•.¸.•´
....¸.•´
... (
☻/
/▌♥♥
/ \ ♥♥
In this (tiny) house we stan
@AndrewSiwicki
!
Inside the life and career rise of YouTube star Shane Dawson's video editor, Andrew Siwicki
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Listen.
I love you.
I also love tiny things!
I also love making things!
I tried to combine all of these loves together and THIS is what happened as a result and I hope that you love it! 👉🏻👈🏻
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When a guy casually takes off his pull-over sweater & his undershirt accidentally comes up with it & u look for a sec cause he can’t see you cause his sweater is over his head, but then the sweater comes off & he regains his vision & u gotta pretend like u weren’t bein’ a creep.
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A pretty cute easy life tip: When someone goes to show you something they love on the internet (TikTok, meme, etc) instead of being like “I’ve seen this” just say nothing & delight in it again with them, because they’re just excited & wanna see ur reaction cause they love you 🥰
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I can’t stop thinking about this dog I saw in starbucks wearing a diaper.
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Proud mama’s boy here. I love my mom so damn much that it’s actually stupid. To my mom, your mom and all moms to be; happy Mother’s Day and thank you 💕
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Me with the cheddar section of those Christmas popcorn tin things
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@Ryland_Adams
“Ok!” He said to Ryland, knowing full-well that that very evening he would be leaving his doors & windows wide open, putting cheese cubes on his floor & praying to every god in existence that the rat would enter his home so that they could hang out & watch Thor Ragnarok together.
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FUN FACT: 0/3 people in this photo remember this photo being taken!
New video coming this week! 🤗
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Late-2019 me: I’m gonna fix my sleep schedule in 2020 & become a better me!
Mid-2020 me at 4:13am:
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I FOUND A BOY TO GO ON MY COACHELLA ADVENTURE WITH 😍
Also we don’t have tickets and have no idea what we’re doing 🤗
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