Dylan Adler
@DylanAdler6
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If Yzma was Asian. Writer on @latelateshow @Dylanadler_ on insta He/Him
Los Angeles, CA
Joined October 2018
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Pinned Tweet
Here’s my full
@latelateshow
stand up set! 🙏🏼 My mom made a surprise appearance lol.
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My Japanese mom said if I got on America’s Got Talent she’d pretend she doesn’t support my comedy career & no longer speaks to me to give me a solid “backstory”. She said she’d plan a dramatic moment where she “calls” for the first time in 5 years. I love her so much.
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Footage of a real live quick change I did during a Shakespearean play
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No matter how hard I’m ugly crying my therapist cuts that shit off right at 45 like “Let’s explore that next week”
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My mom got this book to help me when I was getting bullied in middle school I’m dying
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I was rejected from being a dancer at universal studios so I came to watch their first show
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No I will not use your crazy ass very strong password thank u very much
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“I wish I had Olivia Rodrigo when I was 15” you had Dubstep you ungrateful piece of shit
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Yoshiko is a real one
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Ppl 👏🏼 with 👏🏼 good 👏🏼 voices 👏🏼 shouldn’t 👏🏼be 👏🏼 allowed 👏🏼 to 👏🏼 do 👏🏼karaoke 👏🏼
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Happy Mother’s Day to my mom who got me this book to help me in middle school when I was getting bullied
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An Asian woman just told her white husband “stop talking” at H-mart. Nature is healing
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When a doctor is tik tok famous I’m like ……..focus on your patients
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My gay twin brother was like “Bitch I have Tea” then told me about a panic attack he had yesterday
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I’m seeing ur insta story. Ur seeing my insta story. When r u gonna propose
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My gay twin & I had a major fight and at the pinnacle he screamed “YOU DON’T HAVE STAR QUALITY”
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Unreleased footage of Lin Manuel Miranda auditioning for Wicked
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Last year this month I was attacked in NYC by a crazy white guy & it took a while for me to even register it was a hate crime since there was so little coverage on Anti-Asian Hate crimes. There must be more coverage. Change must happen now. Asians are terrified. Below r resources
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Honestly if I got killed by a woman serial killer I’d be like slayyyy Yas 👏🏼💅
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Literally at this very place today a small girl was shoved to the gravel & STEPPED ON by a cop & pepper sprayed and she had to flush out her eyes & I gave her water. This was not reported. She was shaking. FUCK YOU. Defund the NYPD.
You will always be accepted, included and celebrated in New York City. We’ll shine bright tonight in your honor.
#Pride
#LoveIsLove
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Someone’s kind white boyfriend took these photos at Asian Prom on a table then he started falling off
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When my phone stays on 1% for 10 min that’s the Hanukkah candle burning for 8 days
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My Uber driver played “Don’t stop believing” after I told him I just bombed a show I love him
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It’s always “Mr. DJ turn the music up” and never “Mr. DJ how is your healing journey”
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They should pay their rent!
-My Japanese mom watching rent
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If you think a guy is being creepy to a girl on the subway intervene! Last night a guy was being creepy & racist and no one did anything for a while so I came up to her & pretended to know her and after a little bit he eventually went away. It didn’t escalate the situation at all
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We 👏🏼need 👏🏼a 👏🏼 half 👏🏼Jewish 👏🏼 half 👏🏼Japanese👏🏼Gay 👏🏼Disney 👏🏼prince 👏🏼who 👏🏼doesn’t 👏🏼like 👏🏼being👏🏼touched👏🏼
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I tweeted a video of me doing a backflip. Here is what happened
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Never forget when my mom accidentally photo bombed the popular white boy prom photo
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Before my Japanese mom met my dads Jewish grandparents he told her “Just a warning they’re pretty racist” and she said “Just tell them I’m a Jewish american princess”
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Never forget when I taught a comedy masterclass with my friend then we bombed our show 30 min later
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And nobody, in all of Oz. No wizard that there is or was. Is ever..........
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Someone literally just airdropped this to me on the L train
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My Japanese mom opened the fridge and some beans fell out and she said “There’s so much drama in my life”
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If this kid gets the universal studios job I’m gonna scream
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Flirting with a guy then saw his painted nails & realized he’s straight
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An essay I wrote in high school scared my English teacher so she asked to meet during lunch. I told her I felt so depressed and started crying. She said...”You know, when you feel sad, you can just decide to be happy”. I was like....”Ok. Thank you”. Then the meeting was over.
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At 12K I’ll reveal which property brother is keeping me in their attic
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My mom just sent me this pic of white ppl next to her getting sunburnt
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Addicted to the death glares form white ppl today. Here’s a song I did for
@theestherchen_
and
@kylemarian
amazing show
@caveatnyc
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Once I had an empty subway car so I started singing “Wizard & I” and the conductor came in to ask if I was ok
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Why can’t Halloween be in the summer I’m gonna freeze in this slutty costume
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Ugh when u eat soup and it accidentally goes down the wrong pussy
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Normalize 👏🏼 letting 👏🏼me 👏🏼scope 👏🏼out 👏🏼the 👏🏼overall 👏🏼energy 👏🏼 of 👏🏼a👏🏼Club 👏🏼before 👏🏼making 👏🏼me 👏🏼pay👏🏼cover👏🏼charge👏🏼
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My roomie was on tinder and forgot she sent the first message so she had a convo w/ herself
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An👏🏼 app👏🏼in 👏🏼 NYC 👏🏼that 👏🏼shows👏🏼u 👏🏼where👏🏼 u 👏🏼can 👏🏼shit 👏🏼
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The video cut before I did a backflip
Imagine you get on a plane and you have to listen to this
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In all honestly I was bullied so bad in school for being gay. I was called homophobic slurs and once a kid picked me up and threw me in a trash can. That’s why this pride I’m partnering with GLAD trash bags
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I got a king size mattress cuz it didn’t look that big in the store but in my studio Apt it’s non refundable square that takes up half my living space I made a huge mistake 😭
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My gay brother & I started a podcast during quarantine but the 1st recording led to a fight so I called it off and he just Venmo requested me 9$ for the 18$ mic we got on Amazon
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I came out to my twin brother by telling him “honestly the most porn I watch is of guys” and he was like “omg same”. Happy national coming out day
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Every single major news outlet is not calling this what is which is a hate crime. Fucking call it what is I’m so angry. It literally prevents change from happening. I’ve talked with some white friends and some had no idea Asian hate crimes were a problem
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Last night my gay twin brother sprained his wrist doing a cartwheel on the dance floor
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There are actually only 20 gay men in NYC but we walk so fast it makes it seem like there’s more
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I was rejected by the New York Knicks so I came to their first performance
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Not me talking about my secondary crush in front of my primary crush
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My mom told our Japanese grandma we were gay and she was like “It’s this generation. That’s ok. I love them”. And my mom was like……….she never said that to me….???? Happy pride month
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