I wouldn't pay for a blue tick, but apparently I can add a blue whale.

Genius? @realDonaldTrump you don't understand capitalism at all. If I don't buy a thing because it's too expensive, or bady made, or I don't like the shops it's sold in, or I don't like the owner, those are my choices as a consumer. There is NO SUCH THING as an "illegal boycott"

Incidentally, the email that triggered this farcical conversation not only gave a WhatsApp number that no longer seems to be active, but noreply@bt.com as the contact email address. How do I put in an official complaint?

https://t.co/HnPioWTldG

Oh Elon. Eeellon. EEELLLONN! Ah, there you are @elonmusk . I know, long day, you must be shattered. Just been watching all the inspirational clips about Mars on your feed. Cool, cool. You forgot to post this one though, you silly poppet. The one that shows who you really are 😉

🇺🇸😡🇺🇸😡🇺🇸😡🇺🇸😡 Dear @USAmbUK … I wish to formally complain on behalf of ALL British people deeply offended by the behaviour and tweets of US citizen Elon Musk. He is single handedly disgracing your country and offending ours! #elonmusk

Inside the house, every device reports this.

I've just tried the reset button. And refreshed the Service Checker. What is it checking? The router is still rebooting. IT. IS. NOT. CONNECTED. TO. ANYTHING. Your app says the hub is connected & "everything looks ok" That's simply not true, so what is the service checker doing?

Um @skytv what is the point of the service checker on the MySky app if it doesn't actually check? Photo of hub not connected and screenshot taken as near simultaneously as it was possible to do.

Fascinating. If this is the best that @elonmusk's AI can do, I'm less scared of it than I have ever been. Incredible is right though, the results aren't credible at all.

It's not supposed to be fun Elon, you absolute pancake. Being in government is a responsibility. You're not supposed to be there to have fun, you're there to work FOR the people you govern. The world is going to shit at the moment because too many people are enjoying the power.

You know when you keep seeing screen grabs of something and you assume it's been edited for effect? Nope, this one finally popped up on my feed and, good grief, it's genuine. What a weapons grade bell-end. The irony is, his Grok AI thing could have written something better.

What? No sensational pictures yet? He's slipping. BBC News - Trump safe after gunshots in his vicinity - campaign https://t.co/QZcAoZjlae

If I could, I would print out every bit of paperwork now required to export to Ireland & force-feed it to people I know voted for #Brexit. Don't worry, they'll be fine, they can wash it down with glasses of all that extra sovereignty they were crapping on about #BrexitDisaster

https://t.co/cF76ci899L

BBC News - Oasis presale tickets relisted for £6,000 minutes after ballot - BBC News https://t.co/oqYntQ50Nn

Unfortunately, the new landlord keeps lighting bin fires in the town square, so a lot of people are now scared to visit. I still haven't worked out if Premium provides visitors with special fire protection or extra petrol...

Wow. Actually,the only surprising thing about this fantastic display of English exceptionalism is the gender gap being so small. I'd assumed the proportion of delusional men would be greater. But, seriously, if you believe you can, get off the sofa & do it https://t.co/mkoFP1jyeO

My followers are crashing... Because people are leaving this place? Because the algorithm is working against me? Because this site is blocking people from following me (that's already happened)? Please help me reach out to followers I've lost by RTing. And let's try to keep this

I Didn’t Know That You Were Racist…. I didn’t know that you were racist Till I saw you on the news Running out of JD sports With a pair of Nike shoes I didn’t know that you were racist Till it showed you standing there Beside that guy in a football shirt With your right arm

It's like listening to a mad old uncle trying to impress with tales of derring-do that get more impressive with every telling. Except you know he was actually hiding in a corner and missed the whole thing.