Dean Abbott
@DeanAbbott
Followers
17,790
Following
1,551
Media
1,199
Statuses
73,909
Pastoral Counselor. Spiritual Director. Chaplain. Teacher. Writer. Author of Two Books about Virtue and Happiness.
Joined January 2009
Don't wanna be here?
Send us removal request.
Explore trending content on Musk Viewer
-360度カメラ
• 10537787 Tweets
Back to Back
• 1118845 Tweets
Drake
• 384487 Tweets
#23point5EP9
• 331008 Tweets
Sant Rampal Ji Maharaj
• 243176 Tweets
#ขวัญฤทัยEP10
• 240130 Tweets
ONGSASUN LOVEBIRDS
• 173615 Tweets
Euphoria
• 91585 Tweets
Kendrick
• 57321 Tweets
Dua Lipa
• 56338 Tweets
Sony
• 53699 Tweets
Marco Reus
• 45978 Tweets
猫の恩返し
• 42525 Tweets
ゴジラ-1.0
• 38719 Tweets
ガルアワ
• 35209 Tweets
#ساعه_استجابه
• 34340 Tweets
#この世界は1ダフル
• 34014 Tweets
दहेज मुक्त
• 30556 Tweets
#الهلال_التعاون
• 29026 Tweets
雇用統計
• 24946 Tweets
まことお兄さん
• 17959 Tweets
Taylor Made
• 14661 Tweets
D-3 to BLOSSOM
• 12465 Tweets
ウズベキスタン
• 10805 Tweets
冒頭10分
• 10778 Tweets
Father's Day
• 10005 Tweets
Pinned Tweet
My coaching and consultation calendar has been filling up, but some spots remain open.
If you're working through issues in your relationships or with getting to a place of peace internally, click below and let's accelerate your progress.
24
3
27
DO NOT QUIT YOUR JOB.
Make them look you in the eye and fire you.
Then sue them.
171
2K
13K
When I was a professor at a small, struggling college, I suggested we make classes optional for most students and just sell a four-year, residential program where students could live, work, play sports, socialize and receive some minor professional training.
This was what the…
204
485
4K
Human beings were not designed to experience multiple "break ups".
The idea that "breaking up" is normal wreaks damage on the heart.
79
481
3K
I have basically lost all interest in the movies.
Am I alone?
419
109
3K
The current Steven Crowder revelations make a few important things clear:
1. Everything is fake. Behind the scenes of his pro-family, conservative facade, Crowder was living and treating others in a way that contradicts those values.
2. There is almost no actual conservative…
416
304
3K
Raising daughters requires a man to look right in a cute, beloved female face and tell her "no" again and again even when she's crying.
Not a job for wimps.
44
251
2K
The problem in lots of long term relationships is that, in order to feel safe and secure, women require a much greater amount of effort from the man than he is comfortable making.
Most guys just don't understand the level of care a woman needs, and they're shocked when they…
152
343
2K
Of course, life requires work and most people have always worked hard.
But, in the past, people didn't work hard to the exclusion of every other joy in life.
Never before has a 40 hour corporate work week been expected to substitute for all other emotional and spiritual…
She doesn't have the time, energy, or cash to enjoy her life outside of work
12K
2K
11K
208
308
2K
Men who don't do well with women are those who find the whimsy, complexity and mystery of femininity a burden rather than a delight.
33
301
2K
Depression is a normal reaction to a culture that holds nothing sacred.
23
313
2K
Been rewatching "Breaking Bad".
Even before his cancer diagnosis, Walt was predisposed to become a monster by his nihilism and his passivity.
He is a nothing guy, no beliefs in anything, no commitments that give his life meaning beyond the drudgery of day to day material…
58
159
2K
Many people who think they struggle with anxiety actually struggle with shame.
39
282
1K
Sometimes, when people say they're depressed they really just mean they are angry life requires effort.
47
136
1K
@ScottAdamsSays
Is the food poisoned in a way that encourages over-consumption?
Surely, eating too much plays a role of some sort in the obesity problem.
286
41
1K
So many of these young, redpill bros on Twitter talking about how they're gonna wife up a young dime and make a bunch of babies clearly have no idea what real marriage is like.
40
127
1K
@ScottAdamsSays
At the heart of the political is the personal.
Our marriage system is broken because our society has jettisoned its loosely Christian metanarrative that gave people some sense of meaning and direction.
Now we live in ever-increasing emotional and spiritual chaos.
56
76
1K
In just the few seconds of
@DaveRamsey
's show I heard this morning, he managed to outrage me.
According to Dave, an employee who accepts a position at a company but continues to look for a better job is committing a breach of ethics.
Continuing to look for a better job, Dave…
135
118
1K
You know why the Christian patriarchy crowd bothers me so much?
It's because they're bullies.
For each of them, underneath all the Bible quotes and the beards and cigars is the rage-filled, self-centered insecure heart of a playground bully.
Except these guys think they have…
126
126
1K
This is not the ideal wife because it is a drawing, a cartoon character.
Yes, some of the descriptors listed here are fine and good.
But the overall effect of memes like this is that they condition young men to fixate on a bunch of abstract qualities rather than on getting to…
123
91
1K
Why contemporary relations between the sexes are so messed up.
A short thread.
48
260
1K
People never talk about how dangerous your early 20's are.
A time of life when people make decisions that can affect them for decades.
25
181
1K
Women flourish when they are protected.
Men flourish when they protect.
10
119
938
Men,
When you approach a woman from a leadership mindset: declaring your intentions, setting an agenda, pursuing what you want, you intensify her sense of who you are.
When you are passive, halting, unfocused, she cannot feel your presence the way she wants.
Always be leading.
13
99
842
I tweeted this earlier.
The woman in the video says the number one reason married women stop having sex with their husbands is that they lose attraction for him because they stop feeling safe.
Lots of guys in the comments saying "Well, women have sex with dangerous criminals,…
93
56
825
About a year ago, I went to the doctor with an issue.
He literally told me there was nothing I could do to help it through diet or supplements.
Started researching it, and basically took care of the issue through diet and supplements.
Now, I wonder if doctors know anything.
42
61
735
This kind of gender role rigidity is dysfunctional.
Nobody lives like this perpetually in a real family.
In a real family, people are flexible enough to do what is needed at the moment without being anxious about whose "role" every task belongs to.
Ideas like this are a…
To help me post partum, my husband never: woke up to tend to baby at night (he tried at first but quit when he realized he was useless at it), changed a nappy, gave her a bath, changed her clothes, washed a bottle. No baby care, no cooking me food, didn’t wash one dish or ever do…
870
598
5K
65
64
787
Men,
Her "submissiveness" in relation to you is largely a result of her perception of your trustworthiness.
If you want more submission from her, instead of trying to control her, raise your level of trustworthiness.
23
123
736
Most men underestimate how important feeling safe is to most women.
14
137
727
You have no obligation to look. You have no obligation to expose yourself to horrors you cannot stop or situations you cannot influence.
Your energies are much better spent on improving the lives of those near you.
Force yourself to look at the videos of what Hamas did over the weekend. LOOK. This is what moral equivalence brings. Rape of women. Kidnapping of children. Murder of hundreds of innocents, including full families.
5K
9K
48K
35
78
748
The problem with all these guys who want a tradwife etc. is that they really only want half a woman.
They think femininity is fully captured by submissiveness, tranquility, and domesticity.
But there's an energetic, chaotic, creative side too, sometimes dark and vengeful.…
48
94
739
Most men aren't taught that a relationship with a woman means accepting responsibility. No one tells us that a woman represents not only pleasure, but obligation.
The fact that having a relationship with a woman means responsibility and obligation never enters many men's minds.
14
141
668
Too many dudes don't get that there are spiritual and emotional dimensions to sex that can only be experienced with a wife because they require the foundation of a lifelong commitment.
20
74
652
Men need to understand that when women consider them for a long term commitment, those women know they're taking a gamble.
Women, in a sense, are always betting on men.
So, men, if a woman sizes you up and rejects you, she may still see many great things about you. She may…
51
57
692
The average man has no clue how much power he has to make others feel safe and calm just by managing himself and his affairs well.
6
82
653
There is no reason for children to ever have homework. The hours spent at school are sufficient to acquire basic knowledge. Insisting children do more work at home is simply a way of extending the power of the state into the arena of the home.
39
104
572
This is a picture of a man whose cluelessness is destroying his wife and himself.
The look on his wife's face after he finishes his monologue says it all.
He cannot and will not learn how to engage her heart, but instead stays stuck in his pattern of insisting on getting his…
How is this even remotely controversial?
It seems that aspects of life that were universally accepted and unquestioned for millennia are now not only considered abnormal but also viewed as obscene.
His demeanor is of a battered, defeated man, worn by modernity, yearning for a…
856
158
2K
87
66
669
This tweet will damage marriages.
First off, most marital problems are not problems of "communication". They are problems of mismatched values or characterological problems that manifest themselves in relationship.
Second, she is not learning to diagnose him with "neat…
Seen this many times.
-Husband & wife have probs w. communication.
-She goes to therapy. He's not comfortable w. it. She learns from therapist how to diagnose him w. all kinds of neat jargon
-He feels labeled, dismissed, demeaned.
-Shockingly, this does not help communication.
231
70
1K
55
81
662
Sex has a fogging effect on judgement.
One reason to delay it as long as possible in a relationship is to retain the ability to see the other person clearly without the cloud of lust and oxytocin.
17
100
626
So much suffering in our time is caused by a mass media complex that encourages people to pretend, to live false lives chasing values they know deep down are not aligned with who they want to be.
10
184
625
Anxiety is often the result of trying to think your way out of a problem you can only act your way out of.
12
139
622
Let's break this down.
What we see here is an archetypal vision of the healthy Masculine and Feminine.
The Masculine rejoices in the presence of the Feminine and leads a dance.
He gently and safely extends to her an invitation to join him.
The initially resistant Feminine…
Men, you should grab your wife and dance with her. ❤️
15
38
305
20
69
626
Be very careful what mass media you consume. Not only is every movie, song or television show subtly advocating for a set of values, but they also transmit a mood.
Viewers absorb that mood which then influences them and the circumstances they choose to create in a profound way.
19
140
584
No one is less honorable than a man who harms what he is meant to care for.
8
99
586
You know the only thing that makes a healthy relationship?
Healthy individuals.
1
157
594
Contrary to redpill advice, it is ok for a man to be madly and ridiculously in love with a woman.
22
66
534
Modern people are so miserable because everything our culture considers normal is, in fact, extremely harmful and contrary to our deepest nature.
9
119
565
Men tend to have a hard time relating to the fear that is a woman's baseline emotional experience of the world.
Thus, we tend to dismiss their requests for attention and care as demanding to be "treated like a queen" when, in fact, she only wants to feel safe.
31
88
562
There is no such thing as love that is not sacrificial.
Anyone who does not sacrifice for you does not love you.
8
123
561
If psychedelics are supposed to be a shortcut to God, why does the artwork they inspire all look like pictures of Hell?
68
44
542
@domiono
@deadpoet______
A lot of guys have huge senses of entitlement and a lot of women have trouble valuing themselves enough to hold firm boundaries.
6
43
563
The happiest people I have ever known dated basically one person, married young, had kids and lived lives of quiet responsibility.
20
63
531
It's better to disappoint others by being honest than to keep them temporarily happy by concealing your true self.
5
140
526
@hollowearthterf
@Slatzism
"Baby, just because my ideology allows me to get everything I want with no real costs is not a reason for you to doubt it."
3
9
543
Your fantasies about another are never actually about that person.
They are actually about you, your desires, wishes, unmet needs projected onto that person, continual stories where that person is not really a character, but a prop.
17
76
533
A lot red-pill advice to men really does come down to saying "never risk really loving a woman."
32
56
515
The real sign of a healed soul is not happiness, but integrity.
7
152
530
This is such common sense that it wouldn't be controversial at all if this platform weren't over run by insecure guys whose brains have been red pilled to death.
53
49
532
The idea that marriage is going to be some trad fantasy of an ever submissive, malleable robot woman who makes no demands, has no needs and never gets tired is setting these dudes up for a lot of resentment.
4
40
507
The closer the person you are in private is to the person you are in public, the greater your peace.
9
95
503
Our society ceased to believe in love and so has gone mad.
20
52
475
Guys,
If you could reform society by calling women whores, you'd have done it by now.
35
83
496
So many of these guys in my mentions want a woman who only differs from the anatomically.
Spiritually and emotionally, they want another man.
48
46
485
Notice how this is not really a warning against the traditional vice of sloth, but an appeal to the desire to be a "winner".
Get up pre-dawn to work out and separate yourself from the mass of losers out there who don't have the steel you have.
Behind this sentiment is approval…
I refuse to be around people who frequently sleep in.
Loser mentality is contagious.
Winner mentality—also contagious.
I remember sitting down with Jocko Willink and wanting to catch what he had.
One of many reasons I now get up pre-dawn, and work out.
988
422
6K
26
39
497
Every toxic relationship is an attempt to extract value from the other.
Every healthy relationship is an attempt to create value together.
5
64
468
Because the problem starts with men, so must the solution.
The only way out of this mess is to teach men to value their honor, to see that their fulfillment lies in shouldering responsibility not in avoiding it and that they and their masculine nature are good and valuable.
17
42
471
When these men enter into a relationship with a woman, they are overwhelmed by her needs, her feminine communication style, and her emotions.
Moreover, he unconsciously resents her for having needs at all since he has been conditioned to see her solely as a source of pleasure.
7
45
468
Most online conservative Evangelical marital advice comes down to telling women they would find their marriages more satisfying if they just stopped having needs, emotions and intuitions.
29
65
468
Guys who resent women, who blame women for their loneliness and unhappiness exaggerate how much power women have.
This is just an inverted form of pedestalization.
13
67
450
Most people unconsciously resent the fact that love, their greatest desire, cannot be attained without suffering, their greatest fear.
4
90
461
A healthy, loving marriage requires the man to give and give and give to his wife.
She will, at times, be sad, unreasonable, moody, angry for no reason, restless or distant.
These guys need to learn to stand firm through all that. Need to learn to be her rock.
10
29
467
All the dating strategy and relationship skill in the world won't replace the mystery of an unpredictable organic connection with another person.
8
59
443
The feminine urge to be mad at her man because of something he said in her dream.
25
36
438
In relationships between men and women, men bear the greater burden for setting safe and moral sexual boundaries since women are more likely to be agreeable and comply with things they don't really want.
Her physical, emotional and moral safety often depends on his self-control.
17
48
461
All the guys on here trying to correct women or to get them to be more submissive or traditional would be much more effective if they brought more of this energy instead of the brittle, angry, nervous energy they normally project.
Men, you should grab your wife and dance with her. ❤️
15
38
305
25
43
444
What you want:
-Time to think
-Fulfilling relationships
-A health body
-A sense of history
What you get:
- A refrigerator that connects to the Internet.
3
86
410
Parents who subject their children to wild, emotional and erratic behavior predispose those children to accept abuse in later life by normalizing the emotional roller coaster abusers always force victims onto.
14
76
433
I noticed a tweet last night from an angry Millennial woman saying she had never "felt safe." This woman has to be almost 30. It's an easy mistake to dismiss her complaint as being self-centered emotionalism.
29
116
418
The Red Pill has become a guiding mythology for broken insecure men who think the aim of life is never to be duped or fooled.
They imagine the world is full of vicious women, and they think if they can make it to old age without ever being victimized by one, they'll be able to…
93
61
440
Reminder: You have zero obligation to be around people who make you feel bad.
9
87
416
@Jeremyakee
It's a perfectly reasonable point.
Why should he have to pretend he wants to learn to write literary analyses of "The Faerie Queen" when he is neither suited for nor interested in that work?
5
5
438
Women who start relationships trying to nurture a man into being his best always wind up resenting playing the mother role later.
15
34
415
Their entire understanding of relationships has been formed in an Internet bubble, made mostly of other, equally deluded men.
And they've been made unteachable by the argument that anyone who might correct them is either a beta male or a woman who's hit the wall.
5
26
409
I'm not especially interested in the fortunes of Steven Crowder, but I am interested in how our society deals with clear incidents of abuse and in the dynamics of abuse.
When the video of Crowder screaming at and threatening his pregnant wife was released, the best path forward…
38
47
428
In healthy relationships, problems are solved through more intimacy, greater self-revelation.
Unhealthy relationships are always simply a clash of two people's defensive mechanisms, each trying to meet his needs while avoiding vulnerability.
6
78
407
Part of what women find attractive in a man is his potential to create a safe, secure, meaningful life for her.
Because women are always gambling on men, their attraction to any particular man wanes and waxes based on their perception of his competence to create the life she…
36
45
421
Any honest person can see what the game is here.
@Eric_Conn
had a tweet a while ago calling women some other name, and it got tons of views and engagement.
He likes notoriety and wanted more of it.
So he sat around and thought of the next dehumanizing thing he could say about…
69
48
403
A lot of these trad/red pill guys hold a traditionalism that is a millimeter deep.
They don't really believe traditional points of view are true.
For them, traditionalism is just a tool to get women to do what they want.
12
47
401
Any society that does not stress to its young men the importance of honor and of their role as protector will end up with a predator/prey dynamic between the sexes.
12
71
392
So, we end up with a society filled with immature, resentful men and frightened, desperate women seeking power, status and attention as a means of achieving a sense of safety.
Establishing lasting relationships and families in this environment is made even more difficult.
3
34
388
WHY THIS TWEET IS SATANIC: AN EXPLANATION.
Justifying a husband's having sex with his sleeping wife communicates to men that their main concern should be their right to satisfy their momentary urges and desires.
From this point of view, others' negative feelings or…
46
32
395
A man who wants a woman who will never challenge him is a man who wants to be less than his best self.
12
44
377
Men,
All your good qualities won't mean a thing to her if they aren't consistent. You can't be strong, decisive and protective on Tuesdays and Thursdays only.
Everyday. Everyday. Everyday.
10
53
384
Most of us are living lives our nervous systems were not designed to handle.
10
47
382
Too many trad-type guys confuse "submissiveness" in a woman for what is really just a fear-based, people pleasing attitude that ultimately diminishes her and weakens the relationship.
6
47
362
People who think the sole purpose of relationships is pleasure and not growth build relationships that, in the end, offer neither.
2
66
377
The need to pursue "having fun" is a sign of inward deadness, despair and misery.
People whose souls are alive don't try to have fun, they simply take pleasure in moment to moment experience.
9
72
379
Fathers do as much damage through their passivity as they do through their mistakes.
6
37
378