David Letterman
@DavidLetterman
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Donald Trump has said he will end the Green Card lottery. If only he could end the Presidential lottery he was lucky enough to win. #StateofOurUnion
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What the Rich Won't Tell You. Ill swap your Fonzie for a one time only, never to be seen again, Ponzi.
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Little did they know when the Debt Ceiling hits 20. Parental Discretion Advised.
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#MakeANerdUnhappy Telling them that NASA really stands for Nerds Always Sleep Alone
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Donald Trump is set to release the app - TrumpemonGo Using the phone camera you just roam around and throw TrumpBalls at things to fix them.
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#MoreTrustedThanHillary Milli Vanilli claiming they are Siri
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#IfPoliticiansWereComedians they would hand out blows to create jobs and only ever start wars when the Tivo is stuck on pause.
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Donald Trump has entered the - Why did #Sandy bend the crane debate? He would know. Only an expert could keep his bird's nest in place.
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The secret to my success is that I bit off more than I could chew and chewed as fast as I could. #GoodByeDave
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#DavidLetterman is going to retire in 2015. Politicians, Sports stars and anyone that has been on Reality TV are said to be VERY relieved.
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#IDidntTextYouBackBecause I did not want the #NSA to read it.
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