Full site rewrite plus 7-email welcome sequence for Breathe Free Movement. Liam read it back and said: Damn. That's me. Yours could too. DM "Copy" to chat.

Full site rewrite plus 7-email welcome sequence for Breathe Free Movement. Liam read it back and said: Damn. That's me. Yours could too. DM "Copy" to chat.

If your website copy feels like it’s trying to be nice instead of doing its job, get an audit. I’ll tell you what’s working, what’s fluff, and what’s quietly scaring off your clients. DM me “Audit” and I’ll take a look.

Moral of the thread? Your copy might be nice. Polite. Friendly. Well-meaning. But if it doesn’t interrupt doubt or guide decisions, it’s just decoration. Your dream clients don’t need decoration. They need direction. That’s the difference between “maybe later” and “I’m in.”

The result? • Clearer emotional hooks • Stronger benefit-led messaging • Way more social proof • Less vagueness, more “oh damn, she gets me” energy I didn’t rewrite her brand. Just helped it speak up.

8. Final polish: design tweaks ✅ Calming layout ✅ Clean nav ❌ Social links tiny ❌ Chat button hiding in plain sight Fix: • Bigger social buttons (w/ hover effects) • Sticky nav bar • Bolder chat button colour • Optimise for mobile, fast load times Small tweaks =

7. Emails = started the convo, then ghosted Signup box existed. But no welcome sequence. No nurture. Just... vibes. Fix: • Wrote a sample 4-part sequence structure • Suggested segmenting audience by interest • Pitched adding mini client wins + bite-sized mindset tips

6. Digital shop = hidden gem She had hypnosis tracks + resources but no one could find them. Fix: • Highlight best sellers on homepage • Add visual shop previews • Promote free downloads more clearly (lead magnet gold)

5. CTAs were a bit too... British. You know the type: “No pressure, only if you want to, absolutely fine if not...” Fix: • Rewrite CTA copy to highlight the result (not just “book”) • Place a testimonial right next to the button • Sprinkle a little urgency: “Spots filling

4. Testimonials were hiding. Genuinely great client stories. But they were buried like treasure with no map. Fix: • Pulled out punchy one liners as standalone proof • Suggested adding a full page of social proof • Recommended video testimonials if possible

3. Audience? Broad. Message? Blurry. She works with adults, kids, and businesses, which is great. But the copy was trying to talk to everyone at once. Like shouting into three phone calls on speaker. Fix: • Segment the messaging • Add client personas • Tackle objections

2. Services were explained, not sold. Lots of “what” (mindset coaching, hypnotherapy, etc). Not enough “why it matters to me, the reader with 3 tabs open and mild anxiety.” Fix: • Swapped in benefits like “overcome self-doubt” and “build confidence” • Mentioned actual tools

1. The copy was warm but… vague. “Be your best self” is a nice thought. But it’s also printed on mugs in TK Maxx. ✅ The tone was empowering. ❌ But it didn’t show why she’s the one to help. Or what “best self” even means. Fix: More emotional specificity. Less vague

I audited a mindset coach’s site recently. Lovely energy. Beautiful intent. But the words? They were doing this thing where they politely step aside instead of getting in the way of doubt and dragging it out by the hair. Here’s what I fixed:

“Hey! Here’s 10% off. Bye forever!” isn’t a welcome... it’s abandonment with a discount code.

I’ve been on Typeshare 390+ days straight. Now I’m: • Ranked #15 of 85,000 • Writers turned my style into a verb ("Farrellyized") • Sending emails with 60%+ open rates to a weird, loyal list My advice? Don’t post to stay visible. Post to stay valuable.

Imagine your reader: tired, distracted, and one bad subject line away from marking you as spam just to feel alive. Does your email demand attention… or politely wait in the corner like a scared substitute teacher? Is your “call to action” actually telling them to do

The best “metrics” I’ve had this month? • A reader rage-writing their email at midnight and blaming me if they can’t sleep. • Someone laughing so hard they “can’t stop” & quoting my lines back (“Write like a wild animal on espresso. Edit like a sniper aiming for the head.”) •

Your audience isn’t hungry for more health facts. They’re choking on them. Another “Top 5 Gut Tips” doesn’t help. It’s just another rock in their pocket. Give them one action. One reason. Make it land. Make it matter.

Use it right, and you’ve got a built-in cliffhanger your audience can’t resist. Use it wrong, and you’re just another wellness brand politely whispering into the void. Go build a sandwich worth biting into!